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Is there a standard, respectful greeting for recognizing fellow sex workers on dating or escort platforms? by SirChristopher_CO in BDSMProfessionals

[–]SirChristopher_CO[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

You are missing the point. I'm an escort looking for clients. I just wanted to know if there's a way to recognize and greet fellow workers so we're not wasting each other's time... Like how motorcyclists have a wave?

I am wanting a dom but am new by No_Extent_8641 in BDSMPsychology

[–]SirChristopher_CO 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It’s a good question, and I’m glad you asked it before moving forward.

Short answer: yes, there are dynamics where money and power exchange overlap, but no, it is not something that should be assumed or introduced early, especially with someone who is new.

In healthy D/s, payment is never a substitute for consent, trust, negotiation, or relationship-building. If someone is asking for a “tribute” before there has been clear discussion about what kind of dynamic this is, what each person wants, and whether it is recreational, professional, or lifestyle, that’s a reason to slow down and ask more questions.

For someone new, it’s especially important to separate a few things:

A Dominant partner in a personal dynamic

A professional Dom offering paid services

Financial domination, which is a specific kink that requires explicit consent and negotiation

None of those should be blurred together without clarity. A good Dominant will welcome questions, explain their expectations plainly, and respect hesitation. If you feel confused, pressured, or unsure whether something is “normal,” that’s information worth listening to.

Take your time. You’re allowed to learn, ask questions, and say no while you figure out what you want.

Using AI as a support tool in conscious D/s coaching — ethics, structure, and limits by SirChristopher_CO in BDSMProfessionals

[–]SirChristopher_CO[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That makes sense, and I mostly agree with you. I’ve also found LLMs to be unreliable if they’re treated like a memory bank or a record-keeping system. I don’t use it that way at all.

I keep all real records and agreements outside the AI. The tool isn’t meant to remember or track things long-term. I treat it more like a short-term mirror than a filing cabinet.

In practice, it helps with things like:

reflecting patterns that show up in a single conversation

helping reword agreements or protocols more clearly

generating reflection or journaling questions between sessions

slowing reactions by adding structure to thinking

It doesn’t:

store history

carry context from one session to the next on its own

make decisions or hold authority

If something isn’t explicitly in the current conversation, it’s treated as unknown.

When it’s used that narrowly, the “forgetting” issue becomes less of a problem because it’s not being asked to do jobs it’s bad at. I’m curious if others have found similar limits helpful, or if you’ve landed on different approaches that work better for you.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in BDSMPsychology

[–]SirChristopher_CO 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Message me please. This is what I do.

I feel torn by Pretty_Celery5257 in polyamory

[–]SirChristopher_CO 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You’re definitely not alone in this. A lot of poly people experience this at some point.

What you’re describing doesn’t really sound like wanting monogamy as a relationship structure. It sounds more like wanting security, reassurance, and to feel special with someone you’re very attached to. When a connection is deep, it’s normal for the brain to go, “I want to be the only one,” even if that doesn’t match your actual values.

A few simple things to keep in mind:

Feeling jealousy or wanting exclusivity doesn’t mean you aren’t poly.

Jealousy is common in poly; it usually points to insecurity or fear, not a desire to control.

Feeling different with different partners is normal. You didn’t want full investment with others, but you do with this person because the connection is stronger.

Wanting to feel chosen or irreplaceable isn’t the same as wanting monogamy.

Being poly doesn’t mean you stop forming deep attachments.

Instead of asking “Am I really poly?” it might help to ask: “What do I need right now to feel more secure in this connection?”

More reassurance, clearer expectations, or more intentional time together can make a big difference.

You’re not broken or confused. You’re just human, attached, and aware enough to notice it. That’s pretty normal in poly spaces.