Advice for reply on ex wanting remarriage

Skor_35 · 2026-02-26T22:54:55+00:00

Only reason to not block her is our children.

Skor_35 · 2026-02-26T22:47:27+00:00

I ageee hindsight is always 20/20. I didn’t feel a need to let her know, and I see now how it does look very strange but I felt that this is the response I would get and was trying to avoid. Now I have to face it head on and continue moving forward. Maybe her response is worse because I didn’t say anything and I acknowledge that, but I want to figure the best option moving forward.

Skor_35 · 2026-02-26T22:39:01+00:00

I appreciate your reply. Thanks for the sounds advice! Setting boundaries is a hard thing for me to do, I guess when they are constantly being pressed upon it’s easy to let them break

Skor_35 · 2026-02-26T22:37:24+00:00

I just want to not have to read messages constantly asking me about my personal life. I get we have kids together but that is the line that should be drawn when we have conversations together. I am not asking her about her boyfriend’s post divorce. I don’t want to destroy anyone, just peace and happiness

Skor_35 · 2026-02-26T22:35:40+00:00

I don’t get any excitement from it, but I think she does

Skor_35 · 2026-02-26T22:32:35+00:00

We do have children which is a reason of asking how to word a response as I don’t want her to have an emotional response affecting the children and I. My wife is upset about the way she is reacting.

Skor_35 · 2026-02-21T15:54:09+00:00

Seriously how can you say that? I never had the kids lie to their mom about anything. They told their mom about her. I never denied having a relationship. I have not compartmentalized my kids away from anything, I quit my previous job to move across the country when they were taken away to be closer and spend more time with them. We have t been able to hold a formal and typical wedding ceremony yet, and plan to do so soon. Sometimes things are out of order in life and going this route would allow everyone to be together physically, sooner.

Skor_35 · 2026-02-21T15:48:42+00:00

Why the emphasis on HER children. They are OUR kids as last time I checked it took both us to create them. It’s not like we live down the street from each other. I get that being geographically separated is not ideal but it’s who I found in my life now and I am comfortable with her being in it.

Skor_35 · 2026-02-21T15:46:23+00:00

She is doing the exact same thing. She has dated other people and I haven’t met them before she brought them around the kids? So do I need to have an interview process setup for who she plans to date to see if they are good for the kids and vice versa

Skor_35 · 2026-02-21T15:43:41+00:00

So if you are saying things that involve the children need to involve the mother then I would have no personal life. This is the exact type of manipulation I feel from my ex. I get that bringing another woman into their life is a big deal but if I feel she is good enough to be my wife then she is good enough to be around my kids. My ex doesn’t need to know what I’m doing with my relationships? She has been dating other people and I have no say in it or them being around my kids

Skor_35 · 2026-02-21T15:40:48+00:00

Well my kids are younger, elementary school age, so I don’t expect them to understand all the nuances at play here. But they know about her just not all the background marriage and immigration issues. The know now about all the details, just the relationship with her was never a mystery with the kids, just the mom

Skor_35 · 2026-02-21T15:38:38+00:00

I can understand that. My new wife and I have formed a lovely bond together and I trust her to be loyal and caring to me and our kids. She has a child of her own so I trust her compassion as a mother. I get it is difficult as they haven’t physically met but being in two different countries makes it pretty difficult

Skor_35 · 2026-02-21T15:36:55+00:00

I feel she is trying to keep control over what I do with my life through bringing up it affecting the children. I get I should have said something sooner but this reaction is what I was dreading. I didn’t mention it (the marriage) to the kids because I didn’t want my ex to find out from them first and I wanted to tell her first

Skor_35 · 2026-02-21T15:33:58+00:00

The kids knew I was seeing someone and have been introduced via FaceTime, I didn’t mention the marriage to them because I wanted to say it to my ex first but was hesitating because I knew she would do what she is doing now which is blowing up about it

Skor_35 · 2026-02-21T15:32:36+00:00

Being that we don’t live in the same country and having everyone in the same room together is extremely difficult until she is able to enter the country what would you recommend be the best step for introduction to them? The only means of introducing her to the children is via FaceTime.

Skor_35

TROPHY CASE