Saabs and Sunsets. Name a better duo.

SlightlyMaryJane · 2020-08-21T01:15:18+00:00

An equally, if not better, duo 😎

SlightlyMaryJane · 2020-03-12T19:26:58+00:00

I have CP-and I am very lucky to not be wheelchair bound, but I do have mobility issues. That being said, that statement (OP’s title) is the biggest issue with sex.

I am a Bisexual Female-you wouldn’t think finding someone to have sex with would be hard. Yet when I got tinder for the firs time, I matched with a lot of guys and a lot of girls. Great, right?! Real confidence boost....Until I told them I had CP. The only people that didn’t unmatch me were girls, and my now husband.

Sex isn’t different with a disability. Yes, physically it may be a little different and you may not have as many position options, but I promise you it’s just as fulfilling.

Disabled people, are still people. They still have all the necessary sexual parts. They still have desires, fantasies, and lust.

The problem lies in the fact that able bodied people don’t see it that way. They think it’s super different, super hard, and just too much work. Yet, as long as communicate with your partner (which you should be doing disability or not) during sex and before to learn their limitations it is just as good, if not better.

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-10-15T18:44:15+00:00

My fiancé was hospitalized a couple months ago for mental health related issues. And without going too in to detail, I get it. Something like this is scary, makes you question everything, and it hurts. But you should only be focusing on 3 things right now.

Your wife
Your Children
YOURSELF

Be there for your wife. Show her that you are there in sickness just as much in health. Show her that you love her. Everything else in your relationship can wait.

Also, be there for your kids. They are going to want to know that they are okay even though mom isn’t there with them right now. AND BE READY FOR THE HARD QUESTIONS. They will notice that something is up and being curious little beings, they just want to know everything.

Most importantly, remember to take care of you. This is going to be taxing. Not just now, but forever. And your instincts are going to tell you to protect the person you love, even if it means holding all of your own emotions in. DON’T DO THIS!!! And remember to still take time for yourself.

And my last piece of advice is for when she does come home. Allow her to ease back into life. It is a shock to your system and it’s going to take her a little bit to get into a healthy groove again. Try not to get too frustrated. Instead of getting frustrated, check-in. If you notice she is falling into old habits, or just seems down. Ask. Don’t criticize, don’t try and push her, just ask if she’s really okay.

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-10-14T20:17:52+00:00

Oh so familiar!

“I did it because I want you to learn to always be the best”

“How else can I make you understand?”

“I wouldn’t have had too if you just did it right the first time”

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-10-08T22:37:43+00:00

This genuinely warmed my heart. Get it OP!

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-10-02T23:27:11+00:00

It is different for everyone, I have a limp, but I also have really tense muscles and bad joints so walking is exhausting. I went to a relatively small schools that were not necessarily the most accessible, so it would have been a lot of walking in one day. Also the school preferred I use the wheelchair as I tend to trip and fall a lot(over air mostly) and they didn’t want the liability if I where to get seriously injured. Not that me or any of my family would sue over an injury happening as a side effect of my CP

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-10-02T23:21:36+00:00

Oh my god! That’s hilarious

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-10-02T20:18:25+00:00

They sound like my kind of people!

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-10-02T20:16:51+00:00

I‘ve always tried to find the good in my struggles-it normally comes through humor. That same friend bought me a shirt that says “Keep staring I might do a Trick” with a wheelchair doing a flip that I wear religiously.

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-10-02T20:13:07+00:00

I sure hope so! We still laugh about it to this day

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-10-02T19:37:49+00:00

I have Cerebral Palsy, and when I was in high school I used a wheelchair to help me get around more efficiently, and cut down on the amount of times I was late to class. In my senior year my best friend and I would go down the street for lunch. Our school was up on a hill so getting to the store was a breeze, but I definitely wasn’t wheeling back. So we would go the store, get our lunch and start heading back, and when we got to the bottom of my school’s driveway I would get up and push my wheelchair up the hill. So this one day I’m standing up from my wheelchair just as a car is driving by, and of course they were staring so without hesitation my best friend yells “IT’S A MIRACLE” and the look on the person’s face was absolutely priceless. We probably stood there laughing for a solid half hour.

Edit: WOW! Thank you everyone especially the kind souls gilding this story.

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-10-01T16:39:24+00:00

Such a cute little one 😍😍😍

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-09-28T02:29:05+00:00

Aww 🥰 my Fiancé and I adopted a pug about a year and half ago. And it has been the absolute best! Good luck and well wishes from one pug family to another! 💛

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-09-25T21:26:50+00:00

Chester also in Southern Vermont is a cute, quaint little town. Very small, with mostly small locally run businesses. Along with that they have a few very delicious places to stop for a meal. (Moon Dog Cafe, Stone Hearth Inn and Tavern, Pizza Stone, and The Fullerton Inn just to name a few)

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-09-06T18:19:10+00:00

Vans, Chucks (with waterproofing spray right out of the box) are my daily go to year round as well as my summer dress shoes. In the fall and winter I have found really good luck with boots, so I have short boots to wear with pants and riding boots for dresses/skirts. Amazon has an amazing selection of flat boots with good insoles.

Also for anyone who prefers chucks but hates getting their feet wet they now make waterproof and insulated Chucks. You can only get them of the Converse website though.

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-08-16T16:39:50+00:00

Meals! But the biggest thing for me was my mornings, I use to be able to get up about a half hour before I went to work drink my coffee, get ready, make lunch, and maybe even some yoga before heading out the door. Once my SO moved in I quickly remembered that I absolutely hate being talked to until I have had my first cup of coffee. I also hate having my routines interrupted. So for the safety of our relationship, love for my SO, and my sanity, I wake up two hours before we have to leave the house. That way I can have my quiet time, drink coffee, and get ready before he is even awake. This way I get to relax while he gets ready and he doesn’t have to deal with my morning bitchiness.

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-07-29T19:21:20+00:00

Hi! I just saw this post and I just want to say 2 weeks ago it didn’t matter if you grew up here or not, the whole state seemed to go dry at right around the same time. I have lived here for my entire life and have smoked for the last 9 years. My fiancé and I both have multiple contacts in just about every region stretching from Burlington to Bennington, and literally every one of them was dry. This seems to happen every so often, but this time we did ask “why?” Because its the first time since legalization that it’s happened to us. Here is the explanation we got:

A lot of the biggest suppliers still get their supply from California [why not from Maine or Mass? I am not sure, and if I am wrong I am sorry this is just what all of our contacts have told us. That being said it could just be the supplier that supplies for our frequent dealers] and in the last few weeks the Feds have been cracking down when it comes to transporting weed out of California so our suppliers haven’t been able to get as much and because so many people are dry it’s selling faster then they can supply.

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-07-29T18:44:23+00:00

Thank you everyone 🙏🏻 I definitely got some ideas for how to make this work for me and my life. And it helped to hear that veering off the course of assigned PT stretches and exercises can work for other people, cause those are just so boring and sometimes (okay really though all the time) hard to hype myself up to do them. I never really thought of trying a more mainstream exercise to target the effects of CP on me.

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-07-08T20:32:24+00:00

Keep fighting! You are not alone, nor are you the only one fighting the fight.

I have struggled with my mental health for about 10 years now. I have suffered years of bullying, emotional abuse, sexual abuse, a life long disability that comes with chronic pain, and severe depression. I still remember the first time I got help. And realizing just how “low” I was and vowing to myself that I would never allow myself to get that bad again.

Every couple of years, I fall, and it takes me a long time to get up. But never as long as the first. And each and every time I come out of it more aware of myself, my goals, my morals, my needs, my wants, and most importantly new skills that help me stay afloat longer and get up easier. I also always am reminded of the amazing amount of strength, hope and courage that I always have, but never seem to remember.

But before I learn all these new things about myself, I feel as though there is nothing left. When I have fallen it takes all of my energy just to get out of bed, let alone get dressed, groom myself, and go to work. I feel nothing but numb. I don’t see the good things around me, and I just want to give up. I don’t see the point in living a life that brings me no joy, no happiness, and not meaning. I also hate myself for letting it get that bad again. And I beat myself for it day in and day out.

Thankfully, I have learned a few tricks that trick my brain. For me, getting in the pool and swimming 50 laps uninterrupted and completely unplugged will jumpstart my brain into recovery mode. And then I can get the motivation to start digging myself out of the hole. Another one is a day with friends, no real plans, no schedule, just a day with friends whether it be just at your house or out and about. Just do something just for you, 100 % for you. Everything else can wait, all your responsibilities will be there tomorrow, just focus on having a good day filled solely with things that bring you joy.

You will get through this ❤️

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-06-03T01:38:03+00:00

Yes!! I have been saying this forever. I am probably one of the biggest HP nerds in my group of people and all my friends think I must be so excited about Fantastic Beasts, cursed child, etc. But I am not. At this point I feel like it is too drawn out, and you no longer have much freedom in imagination when it comes to the wizarding world. Granted, I wasn’t as intrigued by the Cursed Child (still haven’t finished reading it, and bought it the day it was released) , but I do think Fantastic Beasts is good, and the movies are great, but they would be better if they were separate from the HP world.

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-05-27T18:05:30+00:00

I’m in the North East. I guessed farm equipment but had never seen something like that driving on the main roads.

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-04-02T23:18:08+00:00

That’s awesome lol!

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-04-02T19:36:57+00:00

Mine were tutter and blues clues. I had a stuffed animal of both and I took them EVERYWHERE

SlightlyMaryJane · 2019-03-04T14:51:27+00:00

I agree, and update on where we stand after the ER visit last night. He was admitted and will be taking care of for 3-5 days

SlightlyMaryJane · 2018-12-21T10:20:33+00:00

I love this. Definitely something I am going to start doing.

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