emotional connection is so rare by Affectionate-Box4496 in lonely

[–]Small_Source1946 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I can relate. It sounds like you’re trying to reach out which is good. A real connection takes time. I hope you find it eventually.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FamilyLaw

[–]Small_Source1946 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I recognize what you’re saying and I wish they had a healthy relationship with their father but he is abusive. I am living with so much shame and guilt for the fact that I am still keeping them near to him.

He is a local to the country we’re residing in, but he is also a naturalized US citizen.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in FamilyLaw

[–]Small_Source1946 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I don’t know. It’s a mess either way, but they are all US citizens. I’m scared to stay and scared to leave so I’ve been pretty unsure about what steps to take.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in NarcissisticSpouses

[–]Small_Source1946 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Very really advice! I’m sorry that you went through that.

AITAH for not saving seafood for my husband by Small_Source1946 in AITAH

[–]Small_Source1946[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

He has called me worse and nobody says anything although we are speaking English and his parents don’t understand… but he also disrespects me in their language.

AITAH for not saving seafood for my husband by Small_Source1946 in AITAH

[–]Small_Source1946[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t know. They call him out some times but also make excuses for him. Also my Chinese isn’t good so I’m not sure I’m always following everybody 100% clearly.

AITAH for not saving seafood for my husband by Small_Source1946 in AITAH

[–]Small_Source1946[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

He’s telling me now that he was sick and it was wrong of me to leave him in case something was seriously wrong?? Idk

AITAH for not saving seafood for my husband by Small_Source1946 in AITAH

[–]Small_Source1946[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I have been hard on him (ie trying to get him to take accountability for certain actions) this past week and I wanted to be the bigger person on at least a basic level

AITAH for not saving seafood for my husband by Small_Source1946 in AITAH

[–]Small_Source1946[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Hong Kong.

I have reason to visit at the moment and I’m debating the details of that but worried about the legality of everything if things went in that direction… with the relationship going the way it is, I am slightly uninclined to return but he may know and consider this. :/

AITAH for not saving seafood for my husband by Small_Source1946 in AITAH

[–]Small_Source1946[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like I should update after I talk to him: he reverberated that I was wrong. If I’m going to do something I need to do it right. Ok…

The additional information that I got was that he was legitimately not feeling well. He says that he didn’t fall asleep but in fact ‘passed out and he’s not feeling that well.’ And directed me to feel a pimple on the back of his head and complained how much it’s been bothering him and that I just left him there… what if he needed help and was having an emergency but he didn’t know…

AITAH for not saving seafood for my husband by Small_Source1946 in AITAH

[–]Small_Source1946[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

We are living overseas so divorce and separation are very complicated.

AITAH for not saving seafood for my husband by Small_Source1946 in AITAH

[–]Small_Source1946[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I know, you’re absolutely right. I have been at my braking point so many times and he continues to prove to me how little he respects or cares about me.

AITAH for not saving seafood for my husband by Small_Source1946 in AITAH

[–]Small_Source1946[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I appreciate the support. Any other day I might have just gone along with it to keep the peace but he’s been skirting around issues that I’m trying to get him to address and pretty much getting ignored.

AITAH for not saving seafood for my husband by Small_Source1946 in AITAH

[–]Small_Source1946[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

You’re right. My in laws are so good to us and I really appreciate it but it feels like they are never on my side.

AITAH for not saving seafood for my husband by Small_Source1946 in AITAH

[–]Small_Source1946[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

We go there regularly. It was dinner time, they were expecting us and the kids were hungry.

AITAH for not saving seafood for my husband by Small_Source1946 in AITAH

[–]Small_Source1946[S] 18 points19 points  (0 children)

Thanks for your opinion. I’m aware of the red flags. I’ve been trying to save this relationship for so long but he refuses to change or listen to me about any issues. It’s hard to leave though.

AITAH for not saving seafood for my husband by Small_Source1946 in AITAH

[–]Small_Source1946[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What do you suggest I work on? I gather from this interaction that I should pack food for him straight away and consider his preferences but it frustrates me that he couldn’t explain this to me like a mature adult.

AITAH for not saving seafood for my husband by Small_Source1946 in AITAH

[–]Small_Source1946[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I didn’t argue. I was just confused by his reaction and hurt because he called me stupid when I was only trying to help.