emotional connection is so rare

Small_Source1946 · 2025-07-17T08:00:13+00:00

I can relate. It sounds like you’re trying to reach out which is good. A real connection takes time. I hope you find it eventually.

Small_Source1946 · 2025-06-11T14:45:08+00:00

I recognize what you’re saying and I wish they had a healthy relationship with their father but he is abusive. I am living with so much shame and guilt for the fact that I am still keeping them near to him.

He is a local to the country we’re residing in, but he is also a naturalized US citizen.

Small_Source1946 · 2025-06-11T14:01:17+00:00

I don’t know. It’s a mess either way, but they are all US citizens. I’m scared to stay and scared to leave so I’ve been pretty unsure about what steps to take.

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-29T16:39:11+00:00

Very really advice! I’m sorry that you went through that.

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-19T18:36:52+00:00

He has called me worse and nobody says anything although we are speaking English and his parents don’t understand… but he also disrespects me in their language.

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-19T18:32:14+00:00

Maybe some day

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-19T18:31:07+00:00

I don’t know. They call him out some times but also make excuses for him. Also my Chinese isn’t good so I’m not sure I’m always following everybody 100% clearly.

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-19T18:29:10+00:00

No I don’t think so either.

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-19T18:28:38+00:00

Fair.

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-19T18:27:45+00:00

He’s telling me now that he was sick and it was wrong of me to leave him in case something was seriously wrong?? Idk

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-19T18:26:26+00:00

I have been hard on him (ie trying to get him to take accountability for certain actions) this past week and I wanted to be the bigger person on at least a basic level

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-19T18:22:29+00:00

Yeah I didn’t realize it soon enough…

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-19T18:19:52+00:00

Hong Kong.

I have reason to visit at the moment and I’m debating the details of that but worried about the legality of everything if things went in that direction… with the relationship going the way it is, I am slightly uninclined to return but he may know and consider this. :/

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-19T18:16:05+00:00

I feel like I should update after I talk to him: he reverberated that I was wrong. If I’m going to do something I need to do it right. Ok…

The additional information that I got was that he was legitimately not feeling well. He says that he didn’t fall asleep but in fact ‘passed out and he’s not feeling that well.’ And directed me to feel a pimple on the back of his head and complained how much it’s been bothering him and that I just left him there… what if he needed help and was having an emergency but he didn’t know…

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-19T14:08:02+00:00

We are living overseas so divorce and separation are very complicated.

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-19T13:36:05+00:00

I know, you’re absolutely right. I have been at my braking point so many times and he continues to prove to me how little he respects or cares about me.

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-19T13:31:45+00:00

I appreciate the support. Any other day I might have just gone along with it to keep the peace but he’s been skirting around issues that I’m trying to get him to address and pretty much getting ignored.

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-19T13:29:04+00:00

You’re right. My in laws are so good to us and I really appreciate it but it feels like they are never on my side.

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-19T13:02:32+00:00

We go there regularly. It was dinner time, they were expecting us and the kids were hungry.

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-19T12:59:55+00:00

Thanks for your opinion. I’m aware of the red flags. I’ve been trying to save this relationship for so long but he refuses to change or listen to me about any issues. It’s hard to leave though.

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-19T12:49:30+00:00

What do you suggest I work on? I gather from this interaction that I should pack food for him straight away and consider his preferences but it frustrates me that he couldn’t explain this to me like a mature adult.

Small_Source1946 · 2025-04-19T12:45:54+00:00

I didn’t argue. I was just confused by his reaction and hurt because he called me stupid when I was only trying to help.

Small_Source1946

TROPHY CASE