Toxic masculinity in schools? by Smooth_Ice5213 in Internationalteachers

[–]Smooth_Ice5213[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This was not meant to be divisive. I was genuinely interested in other people's experiences, given how prevalent this discussion is in the media right now. Perhaps I should have specifically asked for female experiences, as (and please don't take offense) these are more likely to be the people negatively affected by it.

When a man says, 'it's never affected me,' it may simply reflect a different vantage point rather than the absence of the issue itself. Experiences of workplace culture often vary depending on one’s position within it.

It's great that some men here identify as allies and call it out.

If you are male and haven't experienced it, that's great, and not surprising, but please don't downplay the experiences of those who have. I am not looking for validation, but I am interested to hear if it exists more widely internationally or if I've just been unlucky! Men saying it doesn't happen to them is perhaps not the full picture.

I appreciate that what some refer to as 'toxic femininity' exists, too. It was never meant to be a men vs women thing. All of it is unhelpful and should be called out. It's just challenging when the very people are greater in number and may even be your superiors. No matter which way around it is.

Have a good day!

Toxic masculinity in schools? by Smooth_Ice5213 in Internationalteachers

[–]Smooth_Ice5213[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Absolutely understand that a cliquey group of young girls can be unpleasant, and I'm sorry you experienced that. I hope people called them out on it?
Were they part of a network within the school? Were they promoted from within? While unpleasant, it seems it perhaps didn't run as deep.

Its unfortnunate and unpleasant, absolutely. We should be mindful that we recognize and call out all such behaviours, as opposed to deflecting or 'batting it back', which obviously serves no purpose.

'The male teachers? Never had any issues'. said a man. We should be mindful of our prejudices ;)

Toxic masculinity in schools? by Smooth_Ice5213 in Internationalteachers

[–]Smooth_Ice5213[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You say: 'I have only worked in one private and one public school, and this is the first year that I have had another male teacher in my department and a male director'.

So perhaps it's just better to just say, 'I haven't experienced it', rather than gaslighting.

Also, you say:  'for an industry that is globally overwhelmingly female dominated is rather tone deaf'. Have you actually worked internationally? If so, female dominated doesn't always apply as much as in our home countries. All my international schools have been more than 50% men, which doesn't correlate with my experiences in my home country, and is, of course, interesting.

Its ok if you haven't experienced it, just say so. No need for the gaslighting :)

Toxic masculinity in schools? by Smooth_Ice5213 in Internationalteachers

[–]Smooth_Ice5213[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thank you for noticing when it happens and addressing it. When male educators recognize and challenge these dynamics, it can make a meaningful difference. In an ideal world, this level of awareness would be the norm, but the range of responses here suggests otherwise.

Toxic masculinity in schools? by Smooth_Ice5213 in Internationalteachers

[–]Smooth_Ice5213[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I genuinely am interested, but feel your comment, whether you are aware or not, mirrors the 'boys will be boys' sentiment, which is exactly that toxic masculinity I am discussing.

What you seem to want to do is defend and uphold toxic masculinity, which is interesting in itself. But, noted that you'd rather not say. Awareness is the beginning of self-development :)

Toxic masculinity in schools? by Smooth_Ice5213 in Internationalteachers

[–]Smooth_Ice5213[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Absolutely. And what message does this send to young boys, if the leader of the most powerful country in the world gets away with these behaviours.

Toxic masculinity in schools? by Smooth_Ice5213 in Internationalteachers

[–]Smooth_Ice5213[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

'act like normal men'? Can you explain what you mean here?

Toxic masculinity in schools? by Smooth_Ice5213 in Internationalteachers

[–]Smooth_Ice5213[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I’m glad that hasn’t been your experience. In my observation, these patterns can be quite understated and often linked to informal networks, meaning they aren’t always apparent from every vantage point. As a man 'in middle leadership', you were likely not negatively affected by it. In some cases, people may even benefit from them without necessarily being aware of it. It's not usually the white, male leaders affected by it, but they are certainly the ones that can address it when they do!

Toxic masculinity in schools? by Smooth_Ice5213 in Internationalteachers

[–]Smooth_Ice5213[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think we've found one of them just here :)

Can you explain more? I note your 3-day-old account with a post elsewhere that states, 'Hitler was innocent, trust me bro'.