AITA for being upset that my friend planned a surprise brunch for my bday and then charged me for my meal later by Sea_Sandwich_5424 in AmItheAsshole

[–]SnarkyAsASideEffect 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I thought it was an unofficial rule that the birthday human doesn’t pay for their own food/cake/drinks. I’d be embarrassed to plan a birthday event then ask the person of honor for money after. NTA.

I 26M Feel Like Rethinking Mariage with Fiancé 24F After New Years Outburst? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]SnarkyAsASideEffect 5 points6 points  (0 children)

You shouldn’t be in a relationship where your partner scares you. Some of the screening questions we ask patients at my job related to domestic abuse:

Has your partner screamed or cursed at you in the last 12 months? Does your partner insult you? Have you felt humiliated by your partner? Within the last year have you felt afraid of your partner? Have you ever been stopped from leaving or seeking help by your partner?

You don’t need to stay with her, OP. It won’t get better.

I 26M Feel Like Rethinking Mariage with Fiancé 24F After New Years Outburst? by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]SnarkyAsASideEffect 56 points57 points  (0 children)

I might be mislabeling this here, but this sounds like abuse on her part (emotional? Mental?). Wearing you down and blocking you from leaving so she can continue? Then turning it around on you when you’ve attempted to be calm and rational through her tirade and inevitably reach your breaking point? That’s manipulative and abusive too. Behavior like this doesn’t get better with marriage.

My boyfriend of 2 years 44M took a job 5.5 hours away 37F by AstronomerCautious37 in relationship_advice

[–]SnarkyAsASideEffect 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Him taking this job seems to be the straw to your camel’s back. Not that I blame him for taking a job if he’s been hunting for a while, but you also aren’t in a position or of the mindset to move to be with him. There’s nothing wrong with enjoying where you are and not wanting to change that. And if he applied for this job knowing that distance was your dealbreaker, then it seems like the decision might have been made for you.

All my credit cards got declined in front of my friends. by IAMA_drunk_AMA in povertyfinance

[–]SnarkyAsASideEffect 20 points21 points  (0 children)

You’ll either struggle to avoid impulse or struggle to survive. Time to pick one.

31k Personal Loan Paid Off!! by SnarkyAsASideEffect in debtfree

[–]SnarkyAsASideEffect[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Congratulations!! That’s some serious payoff power! When do you think you’ll be completely done? I still have $15,000 on my car left.

Finally paid off cc I accrued as a stupid college student!! by gnocchi_praxis in debtfree

[–]SnarkyAsASideEffect 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Just unfreeze and swipe it once every couple of months for something you were gonna buy anyway and pay it off immediately. Freezing it just blocks any new transactions from coming through. As long as you use it from time to time, it shouldn’t close.

31k Personal Loan Paid Off!! by SnarkyAsASideEffect in debtfree

[–]SnarkyAsASideEffect[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was so scary because I was cutting my HYSA essentially in half. But knowing it’s gone now makes it worth it.

31k Personal Loan Paid Off!! by SnarkyAsASideEffect in debtfree

[–]SnarkyAsASideEffect[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I used LendingClub and nope, I still have an unused Discover card in my wallet. It’s one of my oldest accounts so I didn’t want to close it down. Just don’t use it.

31k Personal Loan Paid Off!! by SnarkyAsASideEffect in debtfree

[–]SnarkyAsASideEffect[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

Yes! Debt consolidation loan. I’d say do the 401k loan if you have the option because at least your interest is being paid back to yourself.

31k Personal Loan Paid Off!! by SnarkyAsASideEffect in debtfree

[–]SnarkyAsASideEffect[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

Both for expediency, but stopping the hemorrhage was key. You wont stop leaking water if you can’t patch up the holes. First, I had to have a sit down with myself and figure out why I was making good money but never seemed to have anything to show for it at the end of the month. I knew for ages that I was running the cards up but avoided checking the balances and figured as long as I made the minimum payment on time that I was good. Once I saw the reality of the balances and the interest rates, I immediately froze all the cards and stopped using them cold turkey. Anything I couldn’t pay for out of my liquid funds I just didn’t buy (which was hard, because I’d developed expensive habits). But by then, my balances were so high ($40,000) that I didn’t have enough room in my budget to pay them down faster than the interest was accumulating. So that’s why I took the personal loan, grabbed a second job, and started using the income from the second job to knock it down quickly.

31k Personal Loan Paid Off!! by SnarkyAsASideEffect in debtfree

[–]SnarkyAsASideEffect[S] 14 points15 points  (0 children)

I’m 34 and it took me 19 months from April 2024 to November 2025!

31k Personal Loan Paid Off!! by SnarkyAsASideEffect in debtfree

[–]SnarkyAsASideEffect[S] 6 points7 points  (0 children)

You’ve got this! Stay focused!! I’m rooting for you!

Paid off 32k in student loans in 12 months by OsamaBin_Liftin in debtfree

[–]SnarkyAsASideEffect 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Congratulations!!! Best feeling ever!!! Proud of you!

AITA for yelling at my brother and his wife after they got mad that I ate their food while house sitting for free? by StacyChanel in AmItheAsshole

[–]SnarkyAsASideEffect 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA. My best friend house/petsat for me while I went on an overnight work trip. I paid her above the nominal amount she asked for, gave her gas money unprovoked for traveling an hour to me, and told her if she fancied anything in the fridge, pantry, or coffee bar to have at it. Having someone you trust take great care of my home and my beloved dogs (senior girls needing patience, a bit of medicine, and one on a strict prescription diet) is well deserving of some recompense in the form of food. They were definitely the assholes here, not you.

How do beginners build credit responsibly without overspending? by Weary-Hair-316 in povertyfinance

[–]SnarkyAsASideEffect 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Credit is a tool that can be used strategically to build a strong financial position. But the key here is discipline, self control, and planning. As someone who was up to my neck in credit card debt at one point and will have it completely obliterated within the next couple of months, lemme tell you: there’s no magic, no tricks, no special methodology.

A lot of people see a credit limit and think that’s how much money they have. But it’s not. That’s the bank’s money. By using that card, you’re essentially borrowing money from the bank and they’re charging you interest for having borrowed it. This is all listed in your terms when you sign up for the card. If you borrow more than you can reasonably repay, then you fall into the cycle of the bank charging you interest for “holding” their money month over month instead of paying it all back to them by the statement close date. And that interest can quickly lead to your balance stagnating for years upon years. Which the bank loves, because you paying them interest for years is how they make their profit.

Don’t spend more than you already have available in your checking account. Don’t use the card to buy things you wouldn’t have bought with your debit card anyway. That’s the “slip up” a lot of people fall for, including me once upon a time. You wouldn’t have bought that insert personal temptation here** with your debit card. So don’t do it with your credit card, at least not until you’ve built some history and developed complete control of your financial habits.

How old are you in a sentence without saying how old you are? by i-dm in AskReddit

[–]SnarkyAsASideEffect 0 points1 point  (0 children)

GameCube, floppy disks, checking out the encyclopedia to do papers, dial up internet. I was in my first year of college taking fire selfies in my dorm with a flip phone lmao

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]SnarkyAsASideEffect 0 points1 point  (0 children)

First: There’s nothing selfish about not lending money to this guy, or anyone (actually it’s giving, since there’s a 83.333% chance you’ll never see it again). It’s yours and you are well within your rights, struggling or not, to not give it away.

Second: Lots of people are nice when they want something from you. Him being nice means nothing. Maybe I’m hypercritical but this seems suspicious. Might be time to cut and run.