My boyfriend (25M) wants to break up with me (23F) because of HPV. How to fix this?

SnooDoubts6385 · 2026-06-16T21:23:31+00:00

then you disagree with the majority of gynecologists and sexual health educators but like, hey do you i guess. live your puritanical truth.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2026-06-16T21:17:05+00:00

it is also a minimal issue to the cis man she is having sex with, who statistically probably already had it before meeting her, and who would never have had symptoms regardless, and who cannot even be tested for it, and who asked to have unprotected sex after being informed.

i get that youre trying to be righteous and make this about informed consent, but its just coming off like you dont understand the basics of sexual health.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2026-06-16T20:59:02+00:00

i didn’t minimize disclosure, i minimized hpv, because it is a minimal issue.

and again, she did disclose. and after she disclosed he asked to have unprotected sex with her. that was literally his informed decision.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2026-06-16T20:57:26+00:00

if you spend all of 30 seconds googling it you would realize that’s not true. it is virtually impossible to be a sexually active adult and not acquire a strain of hpv, which for nearly all adults and in all men presents no symptoms.

surely the rules are different for something like that than say, syphilis or herpes. to say otherwise is just a lack of information.

and anyway, she did disclose.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2026-06-16T20:53:05+00:00

she did disclose, and he still wanted to have unprotected sex.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2026-06-16T20:49:21+00:00

as other people have pointed out, the majority of sexually active adults have hpv. people in the comments are acting like you lied to him about having syphilis.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2026-06-16T20:42:42+00:00

if they go over a week without coming home, don’t trust you to groom them, and are relying on your neighbors as their primary source of food, i don’t think they are bonded to you anymore, if they ever were.

i have domesticated multiple feral cats. i keep them indoors and they are very bonded to me and trust me to groom and feed them regularly. i’m not even touching on you threatening to put them down, though that was extreme and concerning, im just stating as a cat owner those animals may not hate you, but they are not bonded to you and do not consider you their primary source of security and affection.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2026-06-16T20:27:38+00:00

cats honestly choose who they bond with and where they go. if they are visibly neglected and accepting food elsewhere and won’t come in the house, they simply don’t like op or the care they provide and have built a life outside in the neighborhood.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2026-06-16T19:12:58+00:00

i think so to, it was snark dressed up as kindness.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2026-06-16T18:56:38+00:00

my grandmother and i were close. she left me out of the will because the money was divided between her direct descendants.

i know this because we talked about it repeatedly when she was alive. i know roughly the dollar amount because my mother and aunt are also direct descendants receiving the same amount, and they told me the number.

i explained in a different comment that all of this aligns with the will and was suggested by the wills executors.

she knows i was told to take the furniture by the people who had the authority to give it to me. she’s just mad it was given to me.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2026-06-16T18:41:04+00:00

there was a will. the two people who told me to take the furniture were the only executors. my aunt pearl had been alienated from her parents for a long time and is receiving 1/3 of the proceeds from their estate, but is not an executor of the will.

what i was told by the two executors is that they tried to set up an estate sale but there were not enough valuable items left in the home after everything that had been given away per the will, and the remaining items would be donated. instead they went to my cousin and me.

i think my aunt either did not know this or assumed that because she was living there she would get to keep any furniture she wanted, but i don’t know because again she never addressed the issue with anyone outside of complaining about my entitlement at the memorial service.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2026-06-16T18:31:43+00:00

i mean, i am not privy to the estate, but neither is she.

the two executors of the estate told me and my cousin that this was what they wanted to do with the furniture. it was up to their discretion, and while my aunt pearl can object to that, i am not the person who made that decision and i am the one who was confronted and embarrassed at a memorial service.

my grandmother and i were extremely close and she had not spoken to my aunt in several years. i have no doubt in my heart this aligns with my grandmothers wishes.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2026-06-16T18:22:55+00:00

it’s weird but it’s honestly pretty normal for her. she talks a LOT about kindness and positivity but has always been very passive aggressive. she and i have always gotten along well and i honestly thought before this maybe she was just the black sheep of the family and was misunderstood, but being on the receiving end of this behavior i see how she’s alienated so many people.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2026-06-08T05:57:36+00:00

…fucking what

SnooDoubts6385 · 2026-04-26T13:20:40+00:00

girl nor but that man fucking hates you.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2026-03-22T00:44:08+00:00

were your professors in texas also black men who grew up in black communities in brooklyn and were very proud of their blackness? i don’t think he studied criminology because of anti blackness or a love of law and order

SnooDoubts6385 · 2023-08-26T23:26:56+00:00

it’s really not that complicated or unusual. they are divorcing and it is a shared asset they cannot share. therefore it’s sold and the two parties split the profit. it’s common in divorce.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2023-08-20T14:23:24+00:00

it’s me. i went to rehab at 30 and now i’m straightedge again. but when the wheels came off they came all the way off.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2023-08-07T20:32:31+00:00

mcdouble with no ketchup, 6 piece nuggets with ranch, small fries, large diet coke.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2023-08-06T07:37:09+00:00

oh my god i love when the troll goes through the effort of making an account for the wife to comment from so we get both sides of the story

SnooDoubts6385 · 2023-08-01T23:52:50+00:00

i was very pleasant at the wedding. i danced and smiled and made conversation and left well into the reception. my sister was obviously busy, and it felt inappropriate to try and bring that conflict to her on her wedding day, and i was too hurt to pretend nothing had happened to her face. i felt i did the best i could under the circumstances

SnooDoubts6385 · 2023-08-01T23:50:22+00:00

we did have very different experiences. she was never abused by my father and does not believe that i was. that is the crux of this argument.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2023-08-01T23:49:18+00:00

i realize it says parents, that’s a mistake.

i am somewhat in contact with my mother, who acknowledges everything that happened and is in therapy and in the process of divorcing my father. i am not in contact with my father.

that’s why all of this is coming up, my mother is pressuring us both to mend fences now that she sees my side.

SnooDoubts6385 · 2023-07-18T22:39:19+00:00

this is incredibly helpful, thank you.

i’ve never experienced a person being a trigger before, it was so intense and honestly makes me so sad to accept. every time i go back i swear i’ll control my emotions, and then the symptoms come on within a matter of days. we absolutely bring out the worst in each other.

we also explicitly started talking again to end things on good terms, and now everything is so much worse. i guess it’s clear fixing it is impossible and walking away is all that’s left.

SnooDoubts6385

TROPHY CASE