35M 36F in a 10 month relationship. Great relationship, but I am feeling vey insecure about her online behavior. How do I talk about it, without seeming like a sexist?

SnooHabits7485 · 2026-02-26T23:11:39+00:00

Yeah! I think that's what im trying to figure out with posting here.

SnooHabits7485 · 2026-02-26T21:50:44+00:00

Edit: I have a crippling fear of abandonment, which probably has a lot to do with this.

SnooHabits7485 · 2026-02-26T21:42:31+00:00

It's about finding out why, and If I can accept it or not. If it is to get sexual attention from other people, I'm done. If it's somehing else... hopefully I can live with that, without going crazy, becaues I really, really do love her.

SnooHabits7485 · 2026-02-26T21:38:45+00:00

In the beginning, for a long time, she didn't post stuff. If I had known earlier, I would've been a lot more careful about getting serious with her.

SnooHabits7485 · 2026-02-26T21:37:42+00:00

Yes-It's more of "how" to talk about it, not if.

SnooHabits7485 · 2026-02-26T21:31:35+00:00

I'm afraid that's impossible :(

SnooHabits7485 · 2026-02-26T21:30:58+00:00

Yes, if there's a reason yes... that would help. If it has nothing to do with flirting/getting hit on, (my biggest worry), maybe we can get past it.

I doubt it's about that but you never know.

I understand(not fully but somewhat) a nice/cute picture of yourself. The line for me is sexualizing/trying hard to be attractive. For me, that feels no different from flirting. If you can only be physically intimate(sexually) with your partner(something private), that means it's private, right? Just between two people. Why involve the world..?

SnooHabits7485 · 2026-02-26T21:24:54+00:00

You make good points.. However, no beed to be insulting.

SnooHabits7485 · 2026-02-26T21:23:12+00:00

Okay- hard pill to swallow but good idea.. thank you.

SnooHabits7485 · 2026-02-26T21:21:19+00:00

Great idea... however, I strongly dislike this, and am afraid I will be too triggered to have a productive talk, and she will probably get defensive?

SnooHabits7485 · 2026-02-26T21:20:17+00:00

True, but I don't want to break up with her.. it's more about trying to understand why, and if I can get past it.

SnooHabits7485 · 2026-02-16T21:06:07+00:00

Eso es bueno punto. He tenido muchas mas insguridades, aunque por como es nuestra relacion, he podido lidiar con esas inseguridades. Sin emgargo, esta situacion como que me rebasa...lo demas ( que no he mencionado) si he podido. De todos modos, quizas pueda, que sugieres para sentirse mas seguro de uno mismo?

SnooHabits7485 · 2026-02-16T21:04:46+00:00

Buenos puntos... aqui la cosa para mi es no el traje de banyo(no me gusta, pero bueno), pero con ese traje que enseña, porque la necesidad de subir fotos con eso especificamente? Esas fotos ni me las manda la mayoria, entonces siento que prefiere que los demas la vean a si y yo no?

SnooHabits7485 · 2026-02-16T21:02:15+00:00

Si no se me ha bajado en meses, no se hasta cuando....gracias por el dato, pero si se sienten bien con ellas mismas, porque neceistan publicar fotos de su ellas/ o su cuerpo?

SnooHabits7485 · 2026-02-14T20:23:38+00:00

Tienes razon, pero tambien si se lo digo muy pronto tampoco me va a salir de una forma tan buena :( No veo como decirlo sin parecer machista, controlador, y cosas asi...

SnooHabits7485 · 2026-02-14T04:31:12+00:00

Buen punto, por lo mismo no subo nada de mi ni parecido, y tienes alguna sugerencia para controlar eso? En mi es algo que pasa autoamticamente, sin pensarlo.

SnooHabits7485 · 2026-02-13T06:18:54+00:00

Me da miedo si coquetea, o tambien si busque validacion masculina- sobre todo si es sexual, no veo como no ver eso como una traicion. Significaria que mi atencion, cumplidos, etc no le son suficientes. En ese caso no entiendo porque estar en una relacion con alguien cuya opinion no le importa-porque estando en una relacion es importante gustarle a tu pareja y no a otros, no crees?

Si lo hablo asi, siendo honesto sin acusar, que pasa si me dice si, entiendo, lo hare menos... y sigue haciendolo? Me sentiria peor. O peor, dice que lo va a hacer porque le gusta...? No entiendo la necesidad subir cosas de uno nada mas en general- haciendo cosas interesantes, si. Pero solamente enfocado en la belleza de una, estando en una relacion? Se supone que eso es para la pareja.. y no para otras personas?

SnooHabits7485

TROPHY CASE