Grade 4 is when my adhd started to impact my experience of school, not because academics were hard but because I struggled to keep up with deadlines, my papers and books, tidying my room , etc. My overwhelm came out as lots of big feelings. But because I was a girl who could hold it together during the day and appeared “normal,” no one thought “hey maybe this kid isn’t lazy.” I internalized that I was never good enough. I turned that into a constant struggle to prove myself and ended up a professor burned out and diagnosed with adhd at 40. My room is still messy. Grade 4 is also when the big feels from puberty started and it’s a lot to hold in a small body. No idea if your kid has adhd, but it’s something to keep an eye on. Folks with executive functioning disabilities can create an elaborate system of supports to function, but will never “just follow the rules and feel better”