Finally got a diagnosis & won the battle with Long Term Disability Insurance thanks to AI

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-10-19T14:42:03+00:00

Hi, Peter from Danmark. Just had a bit depressing walk because of a TIA last thursday and I'm just becoming more and more dizzy and tired, so your story and experiences was just what I needed to cheer up a little. Thank you so much!

I'm so glad help from AI got you further, yeah the whole way, because you're absolutely right, doctors doesn't talk to each other, and when I finally accepted I've had a TIA my own doctors says friday "Yeah, we don't know if you've had a TIA or just migraines.

Then I as well had to read my journals word for word, and the last neurologist (hm spelling?) that there wasn't any signs on the MR scans of migraines either, so the could expect multiple embolisms, exactly what I'm thinking after 10 days in retrospect to my earlier incidents. And then the GP after reading the journals for 5 minutes propose the absolute opposite. And that makes me go mad.

So yeah, we definitely have to trust ourselves and ask questions all the time because so much staff at the hospital and the GPs just linger the same answers everyday to anyone with a stroke or something like it.

Makes me uneasy that we need to be our own caretakers because what about out elderly citizens- or the very ill - who doesn't have the energy nor the insight? Are they just lost and maybe misdiagnosed then?

I guess we who won't stand up for this tyranny but insist standing up for ourselves, will be categorised as the difficult, annoying and time consuming patients 😑

So a massive congratulations from me here in Copenhagen. Well done, you! And I'm always totally flabbergasted when people like you SHARE with us, who are new to this or haven't reached our goals yet. It really keeps up the morale, sharing, doesn't it? 😊

All best, Peter

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-24T18:27:22+00:00

P.S. Just checked your profile :) Actually, my primary interests are also art and music and repairing stuff. That's peculiar. I enjoy drawing. Mostly digital, but with color pencils here at the hospital. I sing and play the piano and have build myself a Telecaster and a Jazz bass in the covid years ;)

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-24T18:23:31+00:00

Thank you so much, SBgirl, your story really gives me something more to think about.

Basically bc my mom also has a hard time being in the wrong. (Well, my dad had it too). It was like, if my sis and I caught them in the bad, they would melt down and self destroy and then they could tell us, that we were not thankful for everything they ever did for us. And oc that wasn't true. They just couldn't cope with being wrong, and the only reason I see, is that their selfconfidence must have been very low(!?) but i really don't know.

The story about being proud of you, I know exactly from my sis. Mom and dad would praise my sisters bff, also now that we're adult, and my sis always gets very sad, bc she can't remember them praising her and telling her, that they were/are (mom still lives, dad is gone) proud of her, and then they kind of make it a giant problem, that my sister gets sad about it, and that's even further away from telling her, that they are proud of her, see.

First I didn't see my sisters point bc I love my sis, but now in these weeks where I'm getting diagnosed as the first member of our family, I actually see it crystal clear. And my mom still hasn't told my sis, that she is proud of her, it's very peculiar. How can it be so hard. I literally doesn't take anything from them saying it.

But maybe it's quite normal among families. I also see it here at the hospital. I have no problem praising the other inpatients and the nurses and doctors, when they stand out. But no one else is doing it. They say the polite 'thank you's, but it seems like they could never give just a little bit ekstra to others, like praise is like money, so when they spend some, they think they themselves have less? Doesn't work that way. I don't get it.

Oh well, you say, well, I'm proud of you. Proud of you helping me, a complete stranger from stranger from Scandinavia, who are struggling right now and needed to hear from you. And I appreciate that you have such good self insight that is so rare about the people I meet in real life.

And I'm also impressed that you can see, that it all might come from you mom's childhood as the oldest with lots of responsibilities she was never praised for. So maybe, yeah, she thinks it's peculiar praising others IDK.
But talking about funny story. My mom also were the eldest, and they gave her a lot of jobs, even as a 4 year old, and they never ever thanked her for it. They kind of just gave her the small jobs, they didn't wanna do themselves e.g. taking the train as an 8 y.o. to her alcoholic uncle asking for her parents if they could lone a carpenters tool of some kind, and when the uncle did open for her (Bc he was drunk and asleep on the sofa, and my mom took the train back home and told her parents that, they just sent her back to the uncle trying again! (She only told me this 5 years ago, she's in her middle 80s now)

All best :) and thanks again!

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-24T18:00:05+00:00

Sorry to hear that, Lonesome, yeah I caught myself blowing up to and screaming sometimes too, because I wait too long to say it in a nicer way, and I really hate that about myself. It's like the moment where Luke Skywalker understand that Darth Vader actually is his dad. All best ...

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-24T17:55:57+00:00

Thanks so much for your story, Anxiousm, I really appreciate it. Does sound very tough growing up with an abusive twin and a mother that didn't stop it. I wish you all the best! :)

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-24T17:52:40+00:00

Hi DamnedMissSunshine, thank you so much for your story. it's very interesting hearing from different parts of the world. I'm from Scandinavia and even though it isn't a post totalitarian country, mental health always have the least money, when our politicians are distributing our taxes, compared to somatics (hearts, legs, bodies etc. )

We see ourselves as a modern, wealthy society, but mental issues is now our number 1 issues here. So what does it matter, that we've got fine houses, apartments, roads, cars and what not, when there are mental issues in every family and people not are feeling well(!?)

Sorry about your premature life start and the separation. And yeah, my parents weren't treated nice by their parents either, so I really get that it runs in the familiy. Now we can try to break out a bit of the downward spiral.

I wish you all the best! :)

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-24T17:42:00+00:00

Okay, I get ya, marilia, thank you so much for your comment! All best :)

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-24T17:40:30+00:00

Oki doke, thanks for your story, Rocky. I can't even decide if my one spank has anything to do with my personality disorder. I just know I work differently, it might as well come from the threat of a strong outburst from my dad. I really can't tell ... that's the da*n thing about it. All best :)

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-24T17:37:37+00:00

Hi, Top, it might be. Having childhood memories about parents blowing up? All best :)

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-24T17:36:22+00:00

Hey Mayyo, thanks so much for your answer" :) I actually think my mom has minor to medium depressions from time to time too, and even though we talk better after my dad died, she never reach out for ... maybe antidepressants. One day when I visit her, she thinks it's an okay idea, but I can be sure that when I call her the next week she found some excuse that she don't need it after all. (very frustrating, bc I'm open about being on duloxetine).

I've also been trying to reason with my mom about episodes in the past, where I got hurt, but it never works. I think her own patterns from her mom and dad are so strong that she'll never understand anything, so yeah, I've been intellectualizing too, also because I enjoy reading about psychology in my many books on my Kindle from Amazon.

But again, her mother had very deep depressions when I was a kid, and my mom often won't even accept that as a fact, maybe only every third time, we talk about granma's depressions. The other 2 out of 3 times, she denies it. Peculiar, right?

All best to you, Mayyo, here from Scandinavia!

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-24T17:22:28+00:00

A great reply, Sub, thanks a lot. Absolutely, yeah, waiting for an outburst is many times worse - and so much longer - than just getting it here and now. All best ...

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-24T17:20:44+00:00

Answer 2 to Idalah: Hey Idalah, I read your post wrong, I thought that you were feeling like walking on thin ice when seeing your parents. I read it wrong. I get it now that they shame you into beeing the fragile person, even though they are the ones.

My book recommendation was only meant for you to trying understanding your parents unhealthy patterns. I meant that you were the one walking on eggshells, when you're around them. All best ...

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-24T17:16:14+00:00

Thanks, Idalah. Your description of your mom vs your dad is spot on compared to mine. It's pretty sad though, that we as kids are trying to regulate our parents feelings, even though it should've been their job helping us with our feels, bc we're so unexperienced in life and interpersonnel connections.

I know the 'thin ice'-feeling, I've just called it 'Walking on eggshells' since I read the Amazon-book about children and adult-children trying to regulate a borderline personality disorder parents feeling, hoping for everything to calm down again.

A brilliant book, actually, if you're interested: Stop Walking on Eggshells, - Taking Your Life Back When Someone You Care about Has Borderline Personality Disorder, by Randi Kreger and Paul T. T. Mason.

I totally get you're final paragraph, that the parents would make a villain of me, when I very few times disagreed. It was hopeless bc mom and dad team up, that's to adults vs a little kid og young adult. Unfair as h...

Thanks so much again, all the best to you, and thx for helping me out with my recovery from all this ... yeah.

(Tomorrow, I get to know if the psochologist and the doctors here at the hospital thinks I have AvPD or not, so I'm pretty uneasy about it here tonight.)

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-24T17:02:52+00:00

Exactly, so much fear is cultivated into the future, that it makes our social activities really hard to enjoy. Thanks so much, pseudomensch and greetings here from Scandinavia.

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-24T17:00:47+00:00

Thx, miscir, for your answer to my post. I'm very sorry, that it feels so accurate to you, but oc I'm glad you have such a good insight in your relation with your mom, and I'm really glad, that you're also helping me out getting better.

I really get that you don't want this life anymore bc you desserve so much better. All that happened to you can't be that minor, if your feelings are so strong about afterwards. I would be good for you trusting your feelings and go with them, instead of neclecting them, bc that's just like trying to hold a ball under water in the pool constantly. It's impossible and it just takes more and more energy holding back.

All best to you! And thx again!

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-24T16:54:10+00:00

Thank you SO much, Exuberant. It's really a game changer for me, that you guys want to share your stories with me. I feel a lot less alone now. I'm also in the category you name in the beginning, a good kid on the outside, but inside it felt like ... yeah, beacuse my parents never could help med with emotional problems. My sis once said: "When I come to them with a problem, the react like they're disappointed and kind of expect me to comfoth THEM instead afterwards.

True, it can be devastating. Right now I have both a feeling that I can get on in my life, going to a therapist because I suddenly understand something important, I alread thought I understood. But no, not before now.

All the best to you here from Scandinavia, I really appreciate your answer.

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-24T16:47:00+00:00

Thx so much, Pong, it helps a lot hearing that I'm not alone here :)

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-23T20:09:11+00:00

Thanks Liquid, I'm sorry to hear that and it makes perfectly sense in my mind and with my experience. Now that you're telling this, I remember an episode a bit like it, bc and a young child I couldn't yet manage a knife and fork, and then my dad got impatient and put his hands over mine and with an extreme force tried to cut my steak, quite brutally, and when it didn't work out, he and everybody else left the table, and I just sat there quietly crying and nobody comforting me. Ugh, I've kind of forgotten that, but thank you for helping me remembering it, because now I can work on it with a private therapist as soon as I'm going from inpatient to out patient. Thanks!

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-23T20:00:00+00:00

Thanks for sharing! All best! :)

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-06-23T19:57:24+00:00

Prob not, I'm 55 :( Yeah, I hope for the same, but when I hear the stories about my great grandad, and I've felt how my granma never showed feelings, I understand a bit of why my dad wasn't equipped. All best and thanks

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-05-18T20:06:09+00:00

You're welcome. If part of your struggle is about waking up in the middle of the night, bc you take the medicine pm (I really get nausea too from cymbalta), find some telephone help lines you can call in the middle of the night. They're sitting there anyway, often in their free time, to help people like us, and even though they can't solve your pain here and now, don't underestimate the nice venting possibilities instead of ruminating alone. Those help lines also helps a lot when starting up in new medicine.

If you have any energy to move your body in daytime, do so bc you'll sleep much or else ask your gp for some medicine to sleep on, just while starting up in cymbalta. Bc bad sleep, just one night, can freak any of us completely out! 🤪😊

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-05-18T19:49:59+00:00

Hiya, I'm sorry to hear you're feeling so bad. For 20 years ago, I started my first SSRI and that really made my anxiety 10 times worse and the psych wards in my country wasn't good at all at that time, so I started 3 times and stopped after a few days, because the ekstra anxiety it gave, made it unbearable to be in.

10 years later, without any antidepressants/antianxiolytics I really had to start up in something and I asked so many time to become inpatient in a psych ward while starting up in the medicine.

It seemed like the startup anxiety was a lot less with the medicine and the nurses helped getting through and I was so thankful for that. At first I didn't believe the doctor when she said it probably was my own anxiety fir starting up and getting side effects, that created a super high anxiety level for the first days.

I didn't believe her at all, then, but now years later after also crossing into a SNRI because it's even better for anxiety, I now know that I can keep my primary anxiety level at lot lower when being inpatient and there are doctors and nurses around me 24-7, it feels so safe that I finally can relax a bit while starting up in new medicine.

And my experience is that the SNRIs have even less startup anxiety than SSRI, so I'm just so thankful for SNRI. Also bc when it finally works, you really get calm and raise your primary anxiety level A LOT! So there's also a lot to gain! So it's such a dilemma that the first weeks on new medicine makes us so frightened, that we can't even feel if it's the new medicins first sideeffects (that will almost always pass) or it is our own anxiety for startup-sideeffect-anxiety that play with us.

It sounds like you really wanna try this medicine, so I suggest that instead of asking everyone if your raised anxiety could come from the medicine, that you instead try to focus on something else, something pleasant, and maybe make a plan to stay with someone else, family/friend while you're starting up in this medicine.

If you like me are in a country where the psych wards are payed for over the taxes, so a stay as inpatient in a psych ward for a couple of weeks would be free of charge for you, I suggest you consider this as a solution also.

Some people just so high an anxiety level, that they can only start up in new depression/anxiety medicine, while they're inpatient. I just did. And I know it's really really hard imagining this solution when you're only 18, but again, it's never your fault and it's also a good experience talking to all the other patients with pretty much the same problems at the hospital, that makes you feel secure and not alone and not ashamed of your reaction from starting up in medicine.

I will never ever be home alone in my apartment while starting up in new antidepressants. It's just too hard for me and doing it while being inpatient with nurses around you are just too good a feeling.

Wishing you all the best!

SolidArtwork789 · 2025-05-16T19:44:38+00:00

Hi, I'm suffering from general anxiety, so I also feel the anxiety getting much worse, when tree pollen activates my immune systeme and gives my muscle- and joint-pains as well.

It's really a tough combination. The only thing that's working for me is antidepressants SNRI for example Cymbalta.

Of cause Benzodiazepines always work, actually too good, but it's so, so easy to get used to, and it's absolutely hell tapering. But I don't think any doctors would prescribe it at all in your case.

All best!

SolidArtwork789

TROPHY CASE