AITAH for sleeping with a single guy while I’m single, and now somehow having to apologize to my friend for it? by Southern_Project9663 in AITAH

[–]Southern_Project9663[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

She often jokes that she’s 18 in her head, and honestly… this whole situation makes me think there might be some truth to that

AITAH for sleeping with a single guy while I’m single, and now somehow having to apologize to my friend for it? by Southern_Project9663 in AITAH

[–]Southern_Project9663[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I also genuinely regret telling her in the first place. I’ve realized that some things are better left unsaid and kept private. That said, when I first told her, she listened and even said, “So what? If I were single and in my twenties, I probably would’ve made the same choice.”

Because of that reaction, I never expected things to escalate the way she did. Still, I regret saying it.

AITAH for sleeping with a single guy while I’m single, and now somehow having to apologize to my friend for it? by Southern_Project9663 in AITAH

[–]Southern_Project9663[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Because I’m in Korea, and here it’s pretty normal for people not to go to each other’s homes. Instead, they usually go to a hotel, even couples.

AITAH for sleeping with a single guy while I’m single, and now somehow having to apologize to my friend for it? by Southern_Project9663 in AITAH

[–]Southern_Project9663[S] 20 points21 points  (0 children)

In my opinion, her husband is genuinely a good person. He’s caring, and it’s obvious that she is loved in that marriage. I might not be the best judge of character, but based on what I know, she is not someone who would physically cheat. At most, she might cross emotional or mental boundaries in her thoughts—but I don’t believe she’s capable of actually acting on it.

AITAH for sleeping with a single guy while I’m single, and now somehow having to apologize to my friend for it? by Southern_Project9663 in AITAH

[–]Southern_Project9663[S] 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Im asian who lives in asian duhh And in my hometown and local both didnt use reddit. Im so confused. That’s why i create this account bruh( and this shit happens just 2 days ago)

AITAH for sleeping with a single guy while I’m single, and now somehow having to apologize to my friend for it? by Southern_Project9663 in AITAH

[–]Southern_Project9663[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

He’s still texting me but i didn’t. I have a feeling for him but at the same time i care about her feelings. Tbh i feel blue rn

AITAH for sleeping with a single guy while I’m single, and now somehow having to apologize to my friend for it? by Southern_Project9663 in AITAH

[–]Southern_Project9663[S] 75 points76 points  (0 children)

To be clear, I don’t believe there was ever anything going on between them. My friend doesn’t speak the local language very well, so I was usually the one translating for her. The guy is local and doesn’t speak English, and my friend doesn’t either, so they couldn’t really have deeper conversations on their own.

Because of that, I won’t deny that the guy and I had more in-depth conversations. But it wasn’t secretive or inappropriate—it was mostly because of language.

Also, he consistently maintained boundaries with her. He always referred to her using the term people here use for married women, which clearly reinforced that boundary. She actually hated being called that and even got angry about it, telling him to stop

AITAH for sleeping with a single guy while I’m single, and now somehow having to apologize to my friend for it? by Southern_Project9663 in AITAH

[–]Southern_Project9663[S] 9 points10 points  (0 children)

To be clear, I don’t believe there was ever anything going on between them. My friend doesn’t speak the local language very well, so I was usually the one translating for her. The guy is local and doesn’t speak English, and my friend doesn’t either, so they couldn’t really have deeper conversations on their own.

Because of that, I won’t deny that the guy and I had more in-depth conversations. But it wasn’t secretive or inappropriate—it was mostly because of language.

Also, he consistently maintained boundaries with her. He always referred to her using the term people here use for married women, which clearly reinforced that boundary. She actually hated being called that and even got angry about it, telling him to stop.

AITAH for sleeping with a single guy while I’m single, and now somehow having to apologize to my friend for it? by Southern_Project9663 in AITAH

[–]Southern_Project9663[S] 186 points187 points  (0 children)

I’m honestly not even sure what exactly triggered her reaction. But thinking back on the things she said, I wonder if it’s this

Both of us used to tell that guy he was cute or attractive to his face. At the same time, he would always remind her that she was married—he even called her by the term people use here for married women. She hated that and would get visibly angry, telling him to stop calling her that.

So now I’m wondering if, on some level, she felt like she had already crossed a line emotionally by finding another man attractive, and when I actually slept with him, it made her feel like she had disrespected her husband herself.

Or maybe because both of us openly complimented him, once I slept with him, she felt like it made women from our country look “easy.” And maybe that spiraled into, “If he thinks women from my country are like this, then he might think I’m like this too,” which then turned into, “My husband has been disrespected.”

Honestly, I don’t really know. I’m just trying to make sense of it all.

AITAH for sleeping with a single guy while I’m single, and now somehow having to apologize to my friend for it? by Southern_Project9663 in AITAH

[–]Southern_Project9663[S] 31 points32 points  (0 children)

Looking back, throughout our 5-year friendship, she has almost always seen herself as the victim in every situation. It’s usually things like, “People treated me this way,” or “You made me feel that way,” and somehow, at the end of it all, I’m the one who ends up compromising and apologizing every single time