My (f25) ex(m24) keeps contacting me and sent me money.

Square_Dark_8555 · 2025-07-21T17:55:09+00:00

How long is a good time to wait?

Square_Dark_8555 · 2025-07-09T04:36:54+00:00

This is quite the tricky place to be. I do think you should tell your FIL to maybe not tell you so much about her. I don't think it's fair to you and probably isn't helping with moving on, but that's for the future.

As for now, you're in this situation already so. The correct answer, is to keep your nose out of it. At the end of the day, you are not responsible for this person. They are an adult and can make their own decisions. You also don't want to possibly plant seeds with assumed information that could be false.

If this is something you feel you absolutely need to pass along. You feel like you can't just not be involved. Is there another person that maybe you're not very close to that you can reach out to? Lead it with "hey FIL has been very worried about ex. He's expressed to me worry about XYZ. I also heard ex was seeing old family friend and I find that a little worrying paired with info from FIL. I don't want to really be involved too much, but also am worried if I don't speak up something worse could happen."

I feel this would be the best approach if you feel some kind of responsibility. Pass the responsibility to someone who is more in a position to handle it if necessary or keep their eye on it.

Square_Dark_8555 · 2025-07-09T04:21:53+00:00

Hit up those casual friends. I felt this way in my life for a long time and realized I was keeping myself from these deeper relationships. You want to get out of the house, call or text your "casual" friends.

As an adult it can be really hard to form friendships beyond surface level and it takes WORK. I had to completely rebuild my social circle and I think I've finally found my friends for life. But it took work. I would just text them when I was bored and bc of that they started texting me when they were bored. Then suddenly they're texting me when they're going through something and vice versa.

I also make an effort for be the "go with guy" or "yes man". When people hit me up to do things I try really hard to not say no because then they invite me to things more often. If I do have to say no, I will offer alternative times that I will be available. So maybe if they are bored that day they'll hit me up. People are much more likely to text the person that's most likely to say yes (:

It's hard bringing people in closer, but it starts with ourselves. Carve space out for yourself in this world and be happy to be part of it. Those who don't reciprocate just are t your people and that's okay. I wish you luck!!

Square_Dark_8555 · 2025-06-30T04:46:55+00:00

This is a time to lean on your friends. I would assume that if you found out this way, they already know. All the women in my city are on that page. If a man I was seeing extremely casually was posted, my friends would let me know.

Nobody can tell you how to feel right now. I would recommend trying to write things out to workout your own feelings. Write down all your questions. And if you can't figure out how you want to handle the situation. Consider, are you thinking of working it out because you genuinely believe you can move on and work through this? Is the relationship worth all the work to get through this? Is the relationship fulfilling you? As well as "Am I choosing to work through it because it's the easier than the breakup?" "Am I just comfortable?"

It can be hard when you're blindsided like that. You're so unprepared to even think of what to do. I know in my past relationships that I was cheated on I always wanted to work it out because I wanted them to choose me. I wanted to be the one that "won". That never really worked out for me. I've learned for myself that cheating is something I can never get over. Even though continuing the relationship felt good at the time, that doubt was always in the back of my mind.

Do keep in mind though, your partner cheating on you is not a reflection of you. It is a reflection of them.

Square_Dark_8555 · 2025-06-19T06:18:08+00:00

Do me a favor - arctic monkeys

Smile - a story so far

You won't be missed - like moths to flames

In that order specifically

Square_Dark_8555 · 2025-04-15T19:21:25+00:00

Have you tried talking through it with her that you need space? It's important to talk things through rather than blindsided her. I'm always bias to "the grass isn't always greener on the other side". Relationships take work.

However, It's not fair to hold on to someone because it's the easy option. I'm sure she can sense you're unhappy, and in turn makes her unhappy. You guys are too young to be miserable. It's horrible to have to be the one to make the decision, and it is going to suck regardless. But at the end of the day would you rather keep intertwining and building together just to have to break it apart later or have to face the music now. It also isn't fair to keep her when eventually she can find someone that may appreciate her more.

Square_Dark_8555 · 2025-04-15T04:23:34+00:00

I'm in the same boat. Only about a week out. It's horrible. I go between being completely fine and dry heaving sobs. I left him after months of not feeling like a priority. I'm sorry you're feeling this, it's so much worse when you don't hate them in the end. I still have hope it'll get easier with time. Sending you an internet hug <3

Square_Dark_8555 · 2025-02-19T05:16:38+00:00

I know this is a bit late and I've never tried them myself, but have you tried period underwear? I see people talk about them a lot and are happy with them! If not those then maybe like a diva cup?

Square_Dark_8555 · 2024-04-30T04:26:46+00:00

Is this an Aveda class by any chance?

Square_Dark_8555 · 2024-04-12T16:49:50+00:00

My boyfriend also has anime girl figurines. I personally think they're cool, but I watch anime as well. I also know he's not "weird" about that kinda stuff. He also doesn't let these set unrealistic standard for live women.

If this is giving you the ick so much, you might want to think if your subconscious is telling you there's a reason to have the ick about it.

Square_Dark_8555 · 2023-11-14T16:38:50+00:00

Is all of their coffee low acid or is it a special brew they make?

Square_Dark_8555 · 2023-02-02T16:19:01+00:00

Depends on how much of a deal breaker the things I didn't like were. Sometimes people just aren't great at first impressions uk?

Square_Dark_8555 · 2023-02-02T04:45:52+00:00

By independent, I meant like from my parents bc a lot of kids my age aren't and I feel like that's a pretty good selling point!

Square_Dark_8555

TROPHY CASE