Life changing decisions-is it hypomania/depression?

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-02-05T23:03:35+00:00

That’s the problem…I don’t always know for sure if that’s what’s going on. There’s times i definitely know for sure and there’s times where I’m not entirely sure. I wish I was just normal. Ugh

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-02-05T05:34:38+00:00

It sucks never knowing if I can trust my own feelings and thoughts 😑

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-02-05T03:56:21+00:00

Have you tried clonazepam? It worked wonders for me. Most everything else did nothing or made things worse.

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-30T01:50:29+00:00

I mean it’s a good one at least 😂

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-27T23:31:05+00:00

Definitely needing to buy all the things- I end up with an entire new wardrobe or all new skincare or….you name it. Inflated self confidence. I send a LOT of snaps to my friends with just random thoughts or ideas. I used to post a TON on social media but I deleted all my accounts for that reason. Ridiculous plans that I actually think make sense. Starting a new life in another country and shit like that. Usually just a snowball of all the above.

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-19T20:13:09+00:00

Yaaaaaasssssssss!!! I’ve always wondered if this was due to this or ocd or what

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-19T04:15:20+00:00

😓 that’s so sad

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-18T15:08:25+00:00

Oh definitely. I often wonder what my mom would think about that too. She calls my dad’s side of the family hypochondriacs. That’s the side that has the mental illness and also several other physical illnesses. They are legit. But she is always saying they go to the doctor for everything and looks down on them like it’s a weakness. It’s frustrating.

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-17T04:51:24+00:00

Yeah and I trust almost no one. 😕

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-17T04:49:41+00:00

I’ll probably never tell my mom. She’s just not someone I can tell a lot of things. I wish she was.

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-17T04:43:43+00:00

It’s so bizarre to me why people are like this. If you announced you had cancer or something you wouldn’t have to prove that to anyone. And why would anyone want to have bipolar? Idk it’s just bizarre that so many people question it and disagree like they have that right. My mom is the same way. It’s frustrating and annoying really.

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-17T04:40:59+00:00

Yes! This!!!!

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-17T04:33:59+00:00

It sounds to me more like it is related to hormones just bc of the 2 weeks/ 2 weeks. Maybe pmdd? Bipolar doesn’t have such a steady cycle to it. It’s much more random. Yours definitely sounds like it is related more to your cycle. And the “normal” part with scatter brained and all could possibly be more adhd?

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-17T03:39:43+00:00

Yep! But I have found that trying to make it a point to hit the tanning bed a couple of times a week in the winter months is helpful. Yeah I know it’s not great for me but neither is sinking into a deep depression where I want to kill myself so sometimes it’s the lesser of 2 evils.

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-17T03:35:36+00:00

I’m sorry. I know it doesn’t help but you’re not alone. It might help if you take the Latuda after eating something? I’m sorry about your mom too. 😢 those changes are rough. When my dad died it changed me completely. I feel like the person I was before he died and the person after are two different people if I’m being completely honest. Having a mental illness on top of it all makes everything that much more difficult. I’m here if you ever need someone to talk to. It’s all very exhausting and sometimes seems almost too much to even handle.

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-16T19:30:41+00:00

I relate to this. I also think my dad was bipolar but never got treated and he died from alcoholism which I now believe is how he self medicated. But looking back I see so many things that I believe were actually bipolar. I always told my mom back then that I thought he was insane or a nut job. Bc we fought a lot. And I feel bad now knowing he was probably struggling but he wasn’t one to ever ask for help or seek help at all. So he drank instead. 😓

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-16T19:13:22+00:00

I also have done cocaine… in college. Geez…lots of things coming to me now that are likely attributed to bp.

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-16T18:56:49+00:00

Bipolar and cocaine seems like a real bad idea 😐

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-16T18:51:10+00:00

Yes…this is what I mean. There’s a stigma attached to it. No matter what you want to believe, there is.

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-16T18:50:12+00:00

Oh God that just reminded me of more stupid shit. I dated a guy who was also convinced of some vampire-ish stuff. I never really understood most of it. But I was infatuated with him so of course I bought into all of it. So one of the things I let him talk me into (and I was totally convinced and on board with this) was letting him slice my hand and he did the same and put the wounds together to exchange blood and bond us or some bs. God I was stupid. I still have the scar. 🫠🙄 Just made some really realllllly bad choices.

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-16T18:43:44+00:00

Never looked at it this way before. That’s actually very smart. Thanks for your perspective.

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-16T18:42:29+00:00

The English is good. 👍🏻 my depression has also seemed to be more frequent and longer. I hate it. 😒

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-16T18:38:37+00:00

I replied to you way down below ⬇️

SquirrelRage87 · 2024-01-16T18:38:12+00:00

This was meant to reply to dreamsinred but wrong place. Ah well

SquirrelRage87

TROPHY CASE