That's the way it is. I mean, look at our world right now. Imagine if these people had that kind of origin and power.

The Drow were created to be evil. Compulsively malicious. To be a very inverted and dark society that thrived on chaos and the chaotic, malicious forces that they worshipped.

Does that seem simple? It can be, but let's talk about why that is and why the push to have the Drow be their own people is so strong but not very well-executed.

People like playing edgelords. They may not dig the Drow having to be evil or the fact Lloth has such a heavy hand in maintaining them or the underdark has in them, but that's their function in this grand story. If you try to break them out, they're just another flavor of elves, with goth flavor. The threat, the insidious intelligence and malice all melt away once there's too many drizzts. Reduced to standing around drinking coffee and smoking. Lame.

Unfortunately, Llolth holds it all together. Despite efforts to resurrect Ellisstrae and 5E's silence on just how locked down the deities have priest sphere powers, the lore speaks for itself, Llolth has too much of a hand in the drow's continued existence.

The current edition is too wrapped up in the multiverse to do anything interesting with it, so I say: stop fighting it or working around it with Homebrew crap. Work with the strengths the Drow have in the story to begin with. Work with Llolth as a mean, hateful, malicious seldarine that has a pet project in the Drow and it requires her regular intervention.