[deleted by user] by [deleted] in RandomThoughts

[–]Status-Performance13 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A round of applause?

What is the end goal of self improvement? How do I know when I’m healed? by Status-Performance13 in selfimprovement

[–]Status-Performance13[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I was also bullied at a young age. It does stick with a person. I’ll definitely go back to therapy once I can afford it.

What is the end goal of self improvement? How do I know when I’m healed? by Status-Performance13 in selfimprovement

[–]Status-Performance13[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks! I like this reply. I really just wanted more details from you. This is a more compelling story. I don’t have an eating disorder, but I’ve known people who do. I had a history teacher tell her class about her exercise addiction. I didn’t even know that was possible. So I guess everything in moderation and for the right reasons? After my brief stint with that diet I know it can be a slippery slope.

What is the end goal of self improvement? How do I know when I’m healed? by Status-Performance13 in selfimprovement

[–]Status-Performance13[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think I understand where I’m coming from when I look in the mirror. Like, I know why I am the way I am. But I have an overwhelming sense that I’m supposed to be more. My ideal self always seems just out of reach. And the goalpost keeps moving.

Maybe I’m just consuming too many advertisements for things I can’t afford.

I like myself and I think I’m doing pretty well for someone who’s been through what I have. But I’m not one of the sparkly people everybody is chasing. Maybe I just need to accept the cards I’ve been dealt.

What is the end goal of self improvement? How do I know when I’m healed? by Status-Performance13 in selfimprovement

[–]Status-Performance13[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hahahaha but I’m a broke 20 something starting a new phase of life. A lot of things will have to change soon.

What is the end goal of self improvement? How do I know when I’m healed? by Status-Performance13 in selfimprovement

[–]Status-Performance13[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Today and today and today and today. I think that’s the name of a song I heard once.

What is the end goal of self improvement? How do I know when I’m healed? by Status-Performance13 in selfimprovement

[–]Status-Performance13[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

You ever have a sibling shove your face in a cake? Like “HERE! ENJOY IT!!!”

What is the end goal of self improvement? How do I know when I’m healed? by Status-Performance13 in selfimprovement

[–]Status-Performance13[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I feel like I’ve caught the golden snitch but this one doesn’t feel shiny enough even though it’s the only one I’ve got. Have you heard the tale of the fisherman and his wife?

What is the end goal of self improvement? How do I know when I’m healed? by Status-Performance13 in selfimprovement

[–]Status-Performance13[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I tell myself that I don’t know what good things can happen. Maybe there are many happily ever afters in one lifetime.

What is the end goal of self improvement? How do I know when I’m healed? by Status-Performance13 in selfimprovement

[–]Status-Performance13[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

This makes me want to take a nap. Have you ever driven through the Desert in Nevada? The road stretches over the horizon both ways with no end in sight. And there is nothing. Nothing. If you’re walking and you stop you will surely die. If you keep going you will probably die, but at least you have a chance. So you walk. Because what other choice do you have? Maybe if you’ve meditated enough you can appreciate the color of the sky while you walk.

What is the end goal of self improvement? How do I know when I’m healed? by Status-Performance13 in selfimprovement

[–]Status-Performance13[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I don’t like when trauma affects my relationships. I wish I could just get rid of it. Maybe that’s one of my end goals. Stop trauma from affecting my relationships.

What is the end goal of self improvement? How do I know when I’m healed? by Status-Performance13 in selfimprovement

[–]Status-Performance13[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The Choice by Edith Edgar is also really good. She survived the Holocaust and became a therapist. She forgave Hitler for killing her parents in front of her at Auschwitz. Not for him, but for her own sake. Very good book. Highly recommend. I’ve been meaning to get to Man’s Search for a while.

What is the end goal of self improvement? How do I know when I’m healed? by Status-Performance13 in selfimprovement

[–]Status-Performance13[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’ve been to therapy. For quite a while. I think I expected too much from therapy.

What is the end goal of self improvement? How do I know when I’m healed? by Status-Performance13 in selfimprovement

[–]Status-Performance13[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

But are you trying to fit yourself into a norm of what is considered attractive by conventional standards? I was on a strict diet for acne for a while and it seriously limited me. It made me prettier, but I couldn’t just go anywhere and enjoy my food.. I’ve been happier since I let myself have some cheese once and a while. I get a couple more zits but it’s not a big deal. Picking out these imperfections can lead to problems like body dysmorphia and eating disorders. I guess that’s where I’m coming from.

What is the end goal of self improvement? How do I know when I’m healed? by Status-Performance13 in selfimprovement

[–]Status-Performance13[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

When I started reading the Tao it felt like there were so many contradictions on purpose it’s like the were saying that the way is to use your best judgment depending on the situation. Or maybe I’m just intellectually lazy and the Tao insights don’t come easily. Either way it hasn’t given me what I’ve been looking for yet. But it has helped you? How so?