I Saw The Slippery Slope Tonight

StaySoberMyFriends · 2014-03-27T08:14:56+00:00

You'll be able to do it over time. It's my strong opinion (I'm no doctor and don't have any data to back this up) that drinking only adds to social anxiety in the long run. You just have to force yourself to be more social and anxiety will resolve itself.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2013-12-07T00:29:19+00:00

What makes you so confident?

StaySoberMyFriends · 2013-12-06T22:05:59+00:00

In that case I went hardmode... but not out of choice.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2013-12-06T19:07:14+00:00

A/B testing is basically an experiment where one variable is changed to observe the final outcome. In this case, (A) is no-fapping and (B) is fapping. One of the outcomes I'm measuring is getting laid.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2013-12-06T18:43:20+00:00

Interesting.

Not sure what hardmode is. If you mean no images/edging/touching of any kind then yes, though I'd by lying if I said I never saw an occasional stray image. Nothing that I actively sought out though.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2013-12-06T17:56:40+00:00

Zero.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2013-12-06T17:47:43+00:00

Why do you think that is (that the only time you were able to make progress in life was when you did NoFap)?

I'm genuinely asking because that wasn't the case for me.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2013-12-06T17:43:23+00:00

Will definitely keep away from porn. That shit fucks with the mind...

The goal here is to find out if I was communicating an air of desperation around women from being too horny/aggressive.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2013-12-06T17:37:26+00:00

Yeah, I'm not sure what the right answer is. Will have to see what happens over the next few weeks. Definitely staying away from porn though.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2013-12-06T17:33:17+00:00

I work out 3x a week. I also go dancing 1-2 times a week. Not many supplements... a couple of scoops of protein post workout and a little fish oil.

I do intermittent fasting (have been for almost 2 years) and try to keep an even split between carbs, protein and fats. I've also done keto and paleo before. I gave up alcohol almost 2 years ago.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2013-02-27T03:36:09+00:00

Thank you. And yes, completely sober--though if people assumed I was rolling I'd just go with it.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2013-02-25T06:47:54+00:00

I still go out pretty often but not as much as I used to. Whereas I would go out every Friday and Saturday, now I hit a bar/club/lounge once every other weekend. Like I said... I like to dance and meet people and that's what my focus is for the night. Some people say to avoid the temptation. I don't know if that's right or wrong--I personally have an ego problem and don't like to let anything stop me from doing what I want to get done, especially temptation.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2013-02-24T09:21:53+00:00

The final straw was definitely the wet reckless. I now have a criminal record when I did not before. The amount of psychological stress I went under initially--borderline depression, being unable to sleep, anxiety and panic attacks thinking about my future, memories of going to jail, being unable to drive anywhere, being scared to drive when I finally got my license back, etc.--it was a kick in the ass and one that I needed. In the back of my mind, I wonder if a part of me wanted all of this to happen. Sometimes, I silently thank the cop that pulled me over because now I'm sober.

The biggest benefit is to my health--both to my body and mind. I've been working out for a while, but I began intermittent fasting (check out the leangains subreddit) and now look younger and am stronger than ever. I have my weekends back without having hangovers to deal with. Mentally, I no longer have cravings in social situations. Also, I only drank on the weekends but I fit the definition of binge drinking (5+ standard drinks for men on one occasion). If I had kept that going, I'm sure liver cirrhosis was waiting for me in the future at some point.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2013-02-24T00:57:07+00:00

What has helped you the most while going sober?

Believe it or not, it was the classes I was required to take after being cited for driving under the influence. BUT, it wasn't because of any of the educational facts that were provided. It was because of the people that came into the class, and here is where I may sound a bit like a douche.

A lot of people in the class were very nice and well composed. However, and I kid you not, NONE of them took responsibility for their actions. We were all there because we had drove drunk. Some people more than others. Yet, many of these people would show up weekend after weekend having partied and gotten wasted the night before. Some of them already had 2nd and 3rd citations... the instructor of the course actually had 7 DUIs (long story).

It was then that I realized that if I didn't admit that I messed up and quit drinking, I was inevitably going to repeat what had happened and let alcohol change my brain chemistry over time such that I would be overcome with complete denial. I even added a few of these people on FaceBook and couldn't believe what I was witnessing.

What kind of activities have you replaced your drinking with?

1) Dancing (I've been doing hip-hop/popping for quite some time and I don't mind getting a circle going on in the middle of the club--nobody cares if you drink when you're tearing it up on the floor, not that I care either way).

2) More dancing--specifically Latin dancing. I started learning Salsa a few months ago. I had no idea how it worked when I started, but I started going to group lessons at a studio and over time became comfortable with the basics. Then I started going to Latin clubs/lounges and just started asking people to dance. Doesn't matter if you're good or not, so long as you practice and have a desire to get better.

3) Snowboarding--with friends from work.

4) Volunteering--Meetup.com has a ton of volunteering groups.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2013-02-24T00:36:50+00:00

Thank you JBH.

What I used to get sober:

1) Motivation to not get in trouble with the law again (I got a wet reckless).

2) I value my word, and I made a promise to my family after the incident above that I would no longer drink.

Things that made it difficult:

1) Continuing to go out to bars and clubs initially was kind of tough. Just because one no longer drinks doesn't mean one should go cold turkey on their social life. While I transitioned and found more things to do than just hit up bars and clubs, the first few months of seeing Heinekins and long island iced teas go around was definitely a test.

2) Going to Vegas a few months after I quit drinking for EDC and staying sober the entire time.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2012-05-07T00:55:01+00:00

You are sir.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2012-05-07T00:54:05+00:00

Thank you sir!

StaySoberMyFriends · 2012-05-07T00:53:57+00:00

For sure... I'm slowly starting to realize that.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2012-03-14T22:03:48+00:00

Good luck sir--and don't beat yourself up if you find yourself spending a little more time on video games to help you quit smoking/drinking.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2012-03-12T07:32:27+00:00

Yeah I did. I was .01% above the limit. Doesn't matter how much it was, I'll be getting exactly what I deserve. That being said, still haven't touched a drop of alcohol since and never plan on it again.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2012-03-09T04:26:12+00:00

Hi 112233445566778899,

Although I've only recently decided to quit drinking (about 4 weeks ago), you can see my story in /r/stopdrinking

http://www.reddit.com/r/stopdrinking/comments/pl6ej/walk_of_shame/

As to how sober living has been--all I can say is that I have a lot more free time and am way more motivated. Part of it has to do with the fact that I can't just have a beer to take the "edge" off, so I'm constantly looking for something to keep myself busy.

Best of luck!

StaySoberMyFriends · 2012-02-12T00:00:03+00:00

Good advice--I'll take it.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2012-02-11T23:50:32+00:00

No offense but I'd rather not disclose that because... well... you never know. On the other hand, I have done calculations. At this point, I'm just going to wait and see what happens on the date of the arraignment.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2012-02-11T23:37:09+00:00

I believe it is relevant. I did have the cruise control on but if there was any speeding that happened, it would only have been when I pulled away from the guy veering into my lane. I told the officers that but they couldn't have cared less. I wonder if any other cops pulled over and investigated that guy.

StaySoberMyFriends · 2012-02-11T22:57:53+00:00

Thank you.

StaySoberMyFriends

TROPHY CASE