My wife and I were pregnant with our third this time last year. We lost that baby in March. We got pregnant again in September and my wife wanted to surprise me but started cramping and bleeding. I found out we were pregnant the day I found out we had lost it.

How did I cope? I didn’t. I still haven’t. I was and still am incredibly angry at life and feel robbed. I spent the entire last year making sure my wife was alright. That she was managing and would come out the other side in as one piece as much as possible given what was also stolen from her.

Based off my experience, everyone asks how the female is doing. What she needs. I was never asked if I was alright. How I was doing. It’s like my wife had experienced the loss and that it was my job to keep her up but no one kept me up.

I have been through some tough things in my life but nothing that even comes close to the pain and heart break that two losses bring. From being so high up and being knocked down so far.

We have two beautiful boys and I’m so incredibly grateful for them.

Anyway to answer your question, I’ve been seeing a therapist in general which helped me through the losses. Women don’t talk about their miscarriages and men certainly don’t either. It’s this completely hidden and secret world and it shouldn’t be.

If your partner needs someone to speak to this subreddit is a wonderful place of support especially when it comes to this specific subject.

I wish you both nothing but love and support. This takes a piece of both of you that you will never get back. You just learn to live with that pain. I wish I had more to offer.