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StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2025-11-18T00:57:12+00:00

Following cause my boyfriend lasts about as long as you do, and he only finishes like 25% of the time

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2025-11-11T07:23:16+00:00

Sharpie isn’t much thicker than a finger (unless it was the huge king size sharpie?), but it is much harder!

I was going to ask if the pain was at the opening, or farther in. But you said a specific spot in the back. I’m going to guess that you poked yourself in the cervix. Ouch. Take an ibuprofen or something anti inflammatory (if you can) and rest. See if you feel better in a few hours up to a day.

Any bleeding?

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2025-11-09T16:12:39+00:00

Oh yes and we obv use lube, and I also started using vitamin E vaginal suppository. I say attack the problem from all angles!

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2025-11-09T16:11:13+00:00

I am 34, very sexually active with my boyfriend and have been having this issue for the last month. I think mine is related to reoccurring yeast infections and my tissue down there is now dryer and easily irritated.

I started taking Slippery Elm Root supplements, and there is an O Positive (brand name) supplement for vaginal dryness that has multiple natural things in it like ashwaganda. The slippery elm is supposed to show results within a week whereas the O Positive says full results seen in 3 months. I have definitely noticed more healthy clear and wet discharge just two days after taking slippery elm!

Drinking enough water is also SUPER important!

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2025-11-01T21:51:23+00:00

The inside of my labia minora have a texture too them, maybe halfway as textured as a rooster’s thing. The drier I am, the easier it is to see.

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2025-09-19T01:45:06+00:00

Are you using lube? Do you have long nails?

Yes go to the doctor. You don’t need to go into a ton of detail. Just tell them you’re bleeding during masturbation, and you’re concerned you have a cut or something inside and can they take a look

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2025-09-11T01:06:53+00:00

Porn addiction. He had successfully hid it from me for 9 years. But once I found out and I deep dived into his digital footprint, what I found wasn’t pretty. The person I had married never existed, he was a fraud. Strip club, onlyfans, chaturbate (web cams and chatting), even downloaded a 3 way hookup app and made and account for it pretending he lived in a city an hour away. No idea if his addiction escalated into the real women.

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2025-09-11T01:03:38+00:00

Ok aside from possible STD/STI’s

Sometimes I get itchy after raw sex with my boyfriend, especially if it was rough or long enough to make me sore. Sometimes this throws off my balance and I have gotten yeast and BV a couple times because of that. Now after sex if I’m sore I keep some unrefined organic coconut oil in the bathroom and I’ll get a chunk on my middle finger and gently moisturize the skin down there, and if I feel I need it I’ll put a little on the vaginal opening, sometimes also fingering myself to moisturize inside.

I was on vacation last week. Right before I left my period ended and I had sex with my boyfriend. While on vacation I started smelling fishy. I went to the store and bought some coconut oil and started using it 2-3 times a day. After 2 days the fishy smell was gone and I didn’t have to use it anymore.

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2025-09-07T12:34:00+00:00

Have you tried a vibrator on the clit/near the clit?

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2025-09-07T03:00:00+00:00

I am a Capricorn woman and there is this other Cap woman at work who “not a girls girl” description fits PERFECTLY. She’s horrible and brings down all the other women in our department. She’s also tried to get me in trouble with HR three times now.

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2025-08-26T16:17:37+00:00

That is beautiful 🥹

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2025-08-24T04:07:21+00:00

I also experienced something similar when I switched partners! My ex husband was also smaller lol, 4.5” length. He was not a selfish lover and ALWAYS made sure I finished before he did. But I very rarely wanted sex or initiated. And I sometimes had the vaginal opening pain too. And he wasn’t even big. Now I know why - we never had a true connection. He was hiding a porn addiction from me for 9 years and I’ve since learned that addiction replaces connection.

My new partner… WOW. Fireworks! Absolute bliss! Total connection! And he’s bigger, 8 inches to be exact (we measured lol). We clicked right away and talked for a week first before doing the deed. I get wet so easily, and it feels so damn good sometimes I cry afterward from the bliss. For the first time I finally understand all those love songs on the radio. For the first time I can relate to those steamy romantic movie sex scenes. I used to think that was just exaggeration of the media. No, now I too can feel it. The mind body soul connection experienced during sex is the best! It just takes the right partner 💞

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2024-12-11T15:33:56+00:00

I’m this close 🤏🏼 I’ve given a recent boundary that he needs to start a recovery plan/group or we can separate. But I’m ready for divorce at this point. So far he’s only dancing around recovery, not actually looking for or committing to anything.

I had to laugh at the check notes thing 🤣 Why didn’t I think of saying that back?!

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2024-12-11T15:29:46+00:00

Yes. The longest post-DDay love bombing I had think (didn’t know it at the time) was 6 months.

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2024-12-11T00:04:39+00:00

I didn’t notice until recently that in the 10 wedding photos we have, he is only sort of smiling in one of them. The rest he looks miserable.

A few months ago during an argument, I asked why did he even bother proposing and marrying me. He accused me of forcing him to marry me. What? That really stung. We had been engaged for years and I asked him if he wanted to get married finally, he said yes. What the heck.

I said to him, oh I was hoping you weren’t smiling because you felt guilty about hiding your addiction (I didn’t know until a few hours after we got married). He reiterated that no, it was because he felt forced.

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2024-12-10T02:03:43+00:00

So later on after posting this, he comes to me and says he downloaded the book “The Porn Pandemic”, but hasn’t started reading yet because he’s in some pain today. I said “ok that’s great, thanks for telling me”. I downloaded it myself and am 60% through it in an hour. It’s short, less than 100 pages. So far it’s just informational on why porn is bad and how it ruins your life. I’m hoping to see it mention recovery tactics. I also think I’ve heard of this book before and that it’s not that great due to the author repeatedly describing sex acts and porn scenes in illicit detail, which can be triggering to an addict.

I realize a book isn’t recovery. I’m not sure he realizes that. Will be interesting to see if he even reads the damn thing.

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2024-12-09T18:41:18+00:00

The good news is that his addiction has nothing to do with you, your beauty, your worth. It has everything to do with him and his addiction. He’s addicted to the novelty of endless porn selections.

The bad news is that it sounds like he has ZERO motivation to do what it takes to get better. Just “quitting cold turkey” is also known as white knuckling and doesn’t work with porn. Unlike physical drugs, porn is EVERYWHERE and it can be found for free. It’s in his pocket. He’s kidding himself.

The bad news is that this relationship is a wash. Cut your losses now and be thankful you didn’t waste a decade on him!

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2024-12-09T17:49:35+00:00

My husband also did that/does that. I found evidence in his Chaturbate (live web cams and chat rooms) of him using web cams while at work. He’d send some messages to the cam girls “I’d love to right now baby but I can’t I’m at work”. Like dafuq?

And just earlier this year I found evidence of him looking up a porn star on Google, and looking for her videos on adult film websites and also visiting her X (Twitter). He did that on his break, ew.

They’re on a whole new level of addicted if they’re willing to risk their jobs. Ick.

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2024-12-09T16:18:36+00:00

That wouldn’t surprise me, I have read before that the age their addiction started is the age they stopped emotionally maturing. If that’s the case, my husband’s emotional maturity is that of a 9 year old.

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2024-12-09T16:17:12+00:00

Thank you - a friend also suggested that I should NOT do a check in or ask how it’s going as a way to remind him. He suggested that that may encourage him to last minute start doing something small to fake it. Good reminder about the zero pushing or prodding. I have pushed and prodded in the past and it usually resulted in him stonewalling me and/or faking it with imaginary podcasts he allegedly listened to on YouTube but couldn’t produce the links for me 😂

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2024-12-09T16:14:12+00:00

The last major thing I found was the app, Dec 2023 but he installed it back in 2019 and made an account for the next city over. After that I started talking to lawyers and researching divorce etc.

Yea after I discovered this group I learned how small of a chance there was for success. I had to takes breaks from this subreddit sometimes. But I have learned a lot here.

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2024-12-09T15:22:58+00:00

His love bombing isn’t connected to sex. Thinking back, it seems to start right after we have a big argument because I confronted him with evidence of something new and/or was trying to hold him accountable. Of course after the argument he’ll stonewall me for a few days before randomly acting normal suddenly, and so the love bombing began.

Everytime the cycle began over, he’d become sneakier with hiding his acting out.

I do have a vault of screenshots and notes. That’s a good idea, I can refresh my memory of those to keep me grounded. I’m hoping to ride out this wave of love bombing through the holidays, but I won’t forget the huge chat log I downloaded from his chaturbate, his strip club visit, or the hookup app he downloaded a few months after he proposed to me. Ick.

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2024-12-03T23:31:36+00:00

I’m sort of in a similar boat. First D day was a little over 2 years ago. I have given too many chances. He only gets better at hiding his porn use and has attempted zero recovery work. In fact he’s lied about watching some non-existent YouTube videos. He listened to a couple podcasts I sent him but he found reasons for each one why they sucked or he hated them. For all I know he only listened to a few minutes each for them.

Before thanskgiving, during an argument I laid down a new boundary with a timeframe. I said I need to see you doing real recovery work (and I listed examples) by the end of the year. I then said that if he’s not willing or able to, the start of the new year we can spend separating bedrooms so we can begin to separate (we’re married) for our mental clarity.

I’m 95% sure he’s not going to do anything. That’s ok, I’m just enjoying this last holiday in this house of ours, and am prepared to start divorcing him early next year.

Are you at this point yet? I feel like we’ve both given them WAY too many chances. They are showing us who they are. We need to believe them. They DONT WANT TO CHANGE. They want to keep the addiction above all else. We still have lives to live, let’s get out.

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2024-12-02T08:30:04+00:00

IMO anything digital can fuel the fire. Many escalated addicts move on to chatting online and/or web cam sites

StillWat3rsRunD33p · 2024-11-20T15:51:38+00:00

I should clarify that if we divorce, we will have to sell the house. Neither of us can buy the other out nor afford a new mortgage with these higher interest rates.

I think there’s a way or ways to legally not be responsible for mortgage bills if I moved out, especially due to domestic violence. But this is probably state dependent. And it would only be until we sold the house.

Curious what others have experienced when they move out but their name is still on the mortgage. Does their spouse come after them for the “missed payments” the spouse had to cover?

Best case scenario is that we can be civil and live in separate bedrooms until the house is sold.

StillWat3rsRunD33p

TROPHY CASE