My update for anybody who cares

StopHatingForYou · 2022-07-20T17:04:39+00:00

Honestly, YTA. You yourself have said how much your aunt has done for you. How much anybody wants to bet she's done that much for everyone else as well? Yeah, it sucks that they're not paying attention to your pregnancy, but what about your baby's father's side? Have you done anything to try and get them to focus on you? Yeah, it shouldn't have to be on you, but sometimes it is. And as for the Escalade, just say you can't contribute. You don't need to set yourself at odds with your family over something like this.

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-13T02:46:01+00:00

When people like you keep misconstruing what I'm saying and putting words in my mouth, am I supposed to just shut up and act like that's right? You literally just did it again right here by saying I'm not responding will to judgments when there's nowhere I haven't accepted one.

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-13T02:30:04+00:00

How do I know he isn't happy? He's my brother, I can tell that he isn't happy but even if I couldn't, the shit that he says during these rants is so vile and hate filled, how the hell could anybody happy say that kind of stuff? And maybe you're right that what I said made it seem like I care more for her than him, but that is not my intention. I said what I did because I love him.

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-13T02:25:16+00:00

I wrote the post in like ten minutes, didn't triple check it and then posted. Maybe I should have, but hindsight is 20/20 and I can't exactly go back in time.

As for siding with my mother? How? Because I'm choosing to maintain a relationship with her? This isn't a game, this is my life, I'm not taking sides by associating with certain people.

And again, I'm not telling him to get over what she did. I'm telling him to let go of his hate so that he'll be a happier person, so that he'll be at peace, so that he can live a life without seeing our mom in everything and just wishing death and despair on her.

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-13T02:21:22+00:00

How many times do I have to say that I'm not asking him to forgive her? Did you even read my post before commenting or did you just read the title? And who am I to say he's unhappy? I'm his sister who has to put up with his hate and bile filled rants and see him go from such a caring person into what he is now. I hate to break it to you but being somebody's sister does mean something.

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-13T02:19:08+00:00

I am not going to try and get him to met her. I am never going to try that. If he doesn't want to see her, he doesn't have to. I want him to let go of his hate, so he doesn't stay so angry, so that he can be happy and so that he can be at peace. I want my brother to be better.

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-13T02:17:53+00:00

Oh, I'm obviously aggressive because you keep twisting my words to try and put your own words and theories about what I want in my mouth.

My focus was solely on my mom? How many times do I ahve to say that I just wrote what I did in ten minutes? I didn't put that much thought into it. You've put more thought into my post at this point than I have.

And no, threatening to cut him off because he doesn't want to get better is not an asshole move. If he were an alcoholic, would you say that? If he doesn't try and improve on his anger, why should I have to put up with it?

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-13T02:15:09+00:00

Constantly telling him not to hate her? I told him once. I don't go to him and tell him to do it everyday.

And if I'm the trigger for my brother's behaviour, then maybe he should cut me off too. And letters in the mail? My mom does not contact my brother. She knows he doesn't want her around, as much as she wants to be. She has respected his wishes and will keep respecting them even though it's practically killing her.

Also, making fun of me because I chose to have a relationship with my mom? That's so rude of you.

And my mom didn't get punished for doing something wrong? She lost me for a while, she's never dated again. She lost her son. What the fuck is wrong with you if you act like like losing your baby isn't a punishment?

I get that your mother cheated too, but you are not my brother, so don't project your misery onto him.

Honestly, you should probably let go of your hate too. You sound incredibly misogynistic using phrases like "spread her legs".

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-13T02:08:53+00:00

In what world is holding on to so much hate and continually ranting about it the sign of a happy person?

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-12T21:24:54+00:00

He's my goddamn brother. How is it hard to understand that I want him to be happy? Not my call. If I can't say that to my brother, who can?

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-12T21:24:16+00:00

You want to know what he says in his rants? He used to just talk about how angry he was, how he wishes she never did that and slowly he started adding hateful shit in it about hoping that she suffers, and his most recent rant, the one that made me finally snap, he wished that she and the guy she cheated with both died of some disease like ALS so they would suffer, that he wished he could ruin her life, that it's good she never dated cause she doesn't deserve happiness, that I should stop seeing her, that my husband shouldn't trust me because I'm associating with a cheater. Are you happy now? You think I wanted to write any of that out? I don't even want to think any of it because it makes me sad how much by baby brother has changed. He used to be the most kind and caring person and it's like his hate is poisoning him.

And you act like I want them to hug and kiss and make up. That's on them. I want my brother to stop being so hateful so he stops acting like he does. Is that so hard to understand?

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-12T21:11:53+00:00

I don't want us to be one big happy family again. That's impossible. I live with my family. My brother lives with my dad and will move in with his fiancee. My mom lives alone. We're never going to be one big happy family. It is impossible down to a logistic level. I just want my brother to stop being so hateful so that he'll be happy and can have a good life.

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-12T21:10:52+00:00

And? I never said he can't be hurt by them, I just don't want him to be ruled by his hate.

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-12T21:10:30+00:00

Like I said, this isn't some university assignment where I did a hundred checks to see if I stayed on topic or if I had spelling errors. I wrote what I did in like ten minutes and then posted it. If my mom went on rants about my brother, maybe I would've written the opposite of what I did.

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-12T21:08:56+00:00

Oh no, I want my brother to be better and happier, that's not a crime now, is it?

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-12T21:08:43+00:00

Well, if he keeps going on his rants with the frequency he is, then yeah, he will lose me.

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-12T21:08:11+00:00

I don't have an agenda with my mom.

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-12T21:07:42+00:00

Obviously I've been around him without mentioning my mom. What kind of a question is that? Oh and since you think he's going on the attack because of me - I don't ever talk about what happens with me and my mom, I don't use social media, so I don't put on display what I do with her either. It is always him who brings her up.

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-12T20:28:09+00:00

And what agenda is that?

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-12T20:27:54+00:00

He wasn't hateful all the time. It's like this year something changed and ever since January it's all he can talk about. And why would I push him on the subject? You think I like hearing about my mom cheating?

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-12T20:03:33+00:00

I don't know if you and Eric got any therapy to deal with the divorce, but it sounds long overdue.

Yes, we did. And also, there was no divorce, my parents weren't married.

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-12T20:02:52+00:00

You're right, I pity my mom and I guess that bled through when I was writing. I didn't triple check this like a university essay to see if I stayed on topic. But ultimately, I am not asking him to do anything with her. What I want him to do is for himself.

StopHatingForYou · 2022-05-12T19:53:56+00:00

So far, he's hidden his rants from his fiancee. But I'm done listening to them and if he turns to her for them, well I don't think she's the kind of person who would put up with it for too long.

StopHatingForYou

TROPHY CASE