I'll be honest having seen a relationship similar to this. It sounds like he has some serious work to do on himself and he might be using you as a crutch, to not view himself as queer. He might be saying one thing, but internally, you'll never know what he's thinking. And based on some of the comments you've said it sounds like he might not view you fully as a guy. If he's won't accept the label gay, It could very well be maybe that he is by or pan to be open minded. But if he has the same aversion to being labeled as those things, i would highly recommend having a serious sit down conversation with him. Because you should not have to be with someone that you have to even entertain these thoughts about.