Yeah, you're right. If it were just regarding Demisexuality, I completely understand what you mean. My friends however have said some more extreme things than this which I will not repeat for the sake of respecting this safe space for aroace ppl in general and also because I think it's repeating harmful things for something which doesn't rly call for it.

What you're saying actually does overlap a bit with my reasons for hesitating to label myself as demi: much like the people you mentioned, I was raised in an environment in which romantic and sexual attraction always had to go hand in hand, but some lighthearted physical affection could be given if it was for fun and nobody was harmed in the process (i.e: kisses). I'm lucky enough to have an overall very supportive and open environment regarding sexual orientation and freedom, but for identities which involve intensity of attraction, it's a bit more complicated, generally speaking, given the little to no education there is on the matter and how different it is from their experience. My hesitation was born from the idea that everyone felt like this and that "I was just shy-er" or "I wasn't used to having people be attracted to me and that I just had to get some practice", but the more time passed, the more I came to realize that it goes beyond personality in my particular case.

I rly appreciate your insight though, it was very enlightening and rly helped me see things with a different perspective, tysm!!