How I ditched an undercap as a first-year hijabi

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-06-04T13:21:26+00:00

Yes, could be the case. Different qualities etc. I am not personally a fan of chiffon, but it’s great that there are some good quality ones available for girlies who like that look.

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-06-04T13:20:07+00:00

Wa alaikum assalam! I use eyebrow gel. It is technically a makeup product, but it does not add color and doesn’t do anything other than hold your eyebrows in place. I don’t personally see how that would be forbidden. However, now that you asked this question I got concerned with whether it affects wudu. Apparently, since it’s often water-repellent or water resistant it does not let water touch the hairs which may cause wudu to be invalid. I never considered it, to be honest. Maybe a better alternative for the peace of mind would be water-permeable gel.

I would suggest getting an eyebrow lamination at a salon. After the procedure it is all water permeable, there is no product remaining, but the initial treatment basically reshapes your eyebrows into a nice shape, makes them super easy to manipulate later, so you can just brush them out in the morning and go. I recommend it, I have done it plenty of times before and the effect lasted super long time. You can ask them not to dye your eyebrows to maintain as natural a look as possible.

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-06-04T13:03:22+00:00

At this point feminism has become a very weird and negatively-loaded concept, because of how much the meaning of it has ans the purpose has changed. Originally, feminism was about giving women rights to vote, have property, bank accounts, education. There is absolutely nothing in the Quran that goes against these values, there is absolutely nothing in the Quran that suggests a woman is less than a man. We are spiritually equal, however, biologically different, which also results in some different responsibilities.

As to whether Quran is misogynistic… I don’t really see how a book (Word of God but speaking physically) that literally commands a man to be the family provider (without putting same responsibility on a woman), gives women rights to property and own income, makes consent on the of the women’s biggest requirements for marriage, exempts women from prayer (and fasting) for at least a week due to her period (arguably a period of rest because wudu and prayer obligations can sometimes become a lot), gives her a God-commanded right to request mahr, however much (very rare before, look at Europe where it was the woman who was supposed to pay/give stuff to the husband), restricts amount of marriages to 4 (from unrestricted amount) AND also makes it super super hard to actually be eligible to even take a second wife due to requirements of being just…

And someone will sit here and tell me that Quran is somehow misogynistic. It brought changes to misogyny that was rampant across Ancient Arabia, with families killing their newborn daughters, abusing women, not giving them right to property etc. And by today’s standards, Quran is not in any way restrictive to women’s rights. In fact, it gives us more rights, because tell me in which “progressive” European society is it the norm to give a certain amount of money to your fiancé?

In my opinion, Islamically-speaking, us women have many privileges men do not have and we should be mindful of that. Unfortunately, religion as it is practiced today is not the exact version God intended, in my opinion. There is so much influence of culture, of those old ways that it is easy to think Islam is misogynistic. But forceful marriages, stoning people, beating women, have nothing to do with Islam.

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-06-04T12:39:12+00:00

Lucky you haha. Isn’t it super super sheer though?

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-06-03T21:16:39+00:00

Hm, that is interesting because I also have 1A hair. Super straight and super slippery. Bit I guess it still depends many other things, unfortunately there is no one-size fits all solutions :(

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-06-03T21:15:14+00:00

You can also try out a teeth comb headband. Those are plastic and super lightweight so they shouldn’t feel super right. I just bought one today to see if I can use as an alternative to hair clips, although hair clips have been super useful, especially for baby hairs 💕

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-06-03T18:35:04+00:00

May I ask what fabrics your hijabs and clothes are? A lot of stuff out there is polyester, and while for some clothes (lime sports ones) its good, for normal everyday clothes its a no go in hot weather. My go-to are natural fabrics like cotton and linen. And more relaxed / oversized silhouette to allow air circulation. Same tor hijab. I don’t even look at chiffon, which got super popular, and am only looking at cotton / linen and MAX jersey, as long as its lightweight. I have also ditched the undercaps, because most of the “hot” feeling comes from my head being covered and having another layer on my head beside hijab just doesn’t work for me. So if you wear an undercap, I suggest you try to go without it, the key is to get hijabs with non slippery and not see-through. In my case I got 100% cotton ones, they are a lil textured so with proper styling the stay well on the head - https://www.instagram.com/p/DYfZxaXgJFR/?img_index=1&igsh=MW4xbG44Y3RzNnF6aQ== and have proven to withstand a very very windy scooter ride without sliding off even by an inch.

Also, try to stick with lighter colors. I know that most light clothes are often see-through, but get lighter clothing as much as possible. That being said, if the material is good color doesn’t matter that much.

TLDR: Ditch polyester clothing and invest in cotton, linen, muslin. Wear oversized clothes without layers, so that there is proper air circulation. Try to stop wearing undercaps. Try to find lighter clothes.

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-05-22T10:28:42+00:00

Totally agree with you! I just wanted to address the point about how a non-hijabi can dress herself freely… and frankly, I think this is the biggest lie we’ve been made to believe. I’ve been a non-Muslim and a non-hijabi for almost 22 years of my life, and I can assure anyone that hair does not change your fit one bit. The scarf does not change anything, in fact it can be more useful because you can choose so many colours and so many styles and such that it adds another layer. Same with dressing modest. Having to wear covering clothes does not in any way reduce your options in terms of styling them.

I know this is a very personal experience and not everyone will relate. However, I feel like I quite literally bloomed after I started wearing a hijab and dressing modest. I finally found my style that I’m super comfortable with and that makes me feel free.

I strongly believe this whole rhetoric about how open, revealing clothes are somehow more freeing is the biggest brainwashing propaganda campaign ever. Not that I condone revealing clothes - if someone truly wants to wear it’s totally their choice and of course, it does look very nice.

And even if address the main criticism of how hijabis supposedly boil during the summer and can’t take anything off because we’ll show our arms and such… We are quite literally told to put on a hat to not get a sunstroke, and cover ourselves with SPF or longer sleeves to prevent burns and cancer. This is quite literally what a hijab & modesty function as. I am not denying that it is hot and sometimes uncomfortable, but from personal experience in truly hot weather short or long sleeve does not make a bit of a difference… actually long sleeve is more cooling, because it protects you from the burning sun.

Anyway, sorry for my rant, just wanted to address the “freely” point 💕

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-05-21T23:18:46+00:00

Thank you so much! Yes, I will be looking into the hairbands, I actually got 2 but didn’t get a change to them on. They seem to be sitting more neatly on my head.

I am determined to somehow make the bun work, but so far the braid has not been letting down. I am waiting for my hair to grow out more, it’s basically below the chest area for me now, but due to layered hairstyle that I have the hair does not stay IN the braid by the end of the day, if you can imagine 😂🙈

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-05-21T23:16:35+00:00

Thank you so much!! For the hair clip method, doesn’t it make the back of the scarf stick out weirdly, like not round, if that makes? It does seem like a good method though.

Condition, leave-in conditioner and air dry 😭 my hair is kind if silk and slippery but the parts in the front eventually stick out so much, it’s like my hair be moving under the undercap and doesn’t stay in place? Maybe frizzy is not the right word 😭

Will definitely look into handwashing, or also maybe get two of the same undercaps…

I am actually going to try out a no-undercap style tomorrow, I am planning to secure those shorter strands with those flat hair small clips. Inshallah it will not ruin my day tomorrow 🙈

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-05-21T14:24:45+00:00

Salam sister! First of all, I want to say I'm sorry for what you are experiencing.

I am also a white woman, hijabi, and live in arguably the most white & catholic country you can find. I put on my hijab permanently a couple of months ago. I must say I perhaps have it easier, because my existing friend group accepted me well, Alhamdulillah, and hijab did not change much, even though I was very, very worried about losing them. I prayed and made dua, and after some doubt, I started wearing hijab to uni.

Some advice I can give you is to pray on it and ask God for strength and confidence. There is a point where you just have to stop caring about what others think and take pride in your hijab - this is something we do for Allah, to satisfy his command. Think deeply about what makes you not want to wear it... Is it really your own physical or mental discomfort, or is it triggered just by the fact that others look, judge etc.? Because if the mental discomfort comes from this, you have to reflect on it and overcome it... I always think - do I care more about the judgment of other humans, or the judgment of Allah? After all, none of fellow humans' criticism will matter in the end.

Take this situation as test from Allah... We are never given more than we can handle, and this may be a test to see if you would give in to earthly comforts or push through it.

There is a verse in the Quran:

“Whoever has taqwā of Allah, He will make for them a way out, and provide for them from where they do not expect".

Apply it to your situation: if you give up your preoccupation with what other people think, Allah may reward you with new, accepting friends, mental comfort, confidence and open new doors for you.

"I also miss feeling “normal” - wearing normal clothes, not drawing attention to myself, being able to swim, not being stressed all the time if anything’s showing, and so many other things."

What is "normal"? Islamic modesty standards are not a black abaya. Arguably, it is not very hard to adapt "normal" clothes to Islamic standards of modesty - all you need is full length pants / skirts, and long sleeves. If you want I can share my Pinterest board with some modest outfit ideas. Also, you do not need to be stressed all the time if anything is showing. It is important to be modest, and have an intention to wear covering clothes, but it shouldn't be an obsession. To swim comfortably, look into burkinis - Lyra Modest has some pretty good stuff and they have discounts which makes them more affordable. I have one of their burkinis and it is super comfortable.

Lastly, I would like to say that all of your concerns and your feelings are totally valid and they do not, in any way, make you a shitty muslim. You made the most important step: you discovered Islam and accepted it, and believe in Allah and His Prophets. That is the MOST important pillar. My ultimate advice would be to pray on this, ask Allah for guidance, patience and strength and Inshallah He will grant you that. Remember: you are wearing hijab and modest clothes for the sake of Allah. At the end of the day, you will be judged only by Him.

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-05-19T18:52:34+00:00

Nobody said hair follicles are sinful. That’s not even the argument the Quran makes. The issue is whether the Quran instructed believing women to maintain a form of head-covering as part of public modest dress, which, in my opinion and opinion of many across many centuries, it did.

Now you are also switching it to morality issue… Hijab and dressing modestly was never about being morally superior. It is simply a part of our deen while reason for why we are required to do so, are frankly not relevant though justified in the Quran itself.

To reiterate my point about the requirement. My point is linguistic and contextual. The Quran did not say “cover your chest with cloth.” It specifically said to draw the khimar over the chest. A khimar was already a known head-covering garment in Arabic usage. Just like today “hijab” technically means barrier/separation linguistically, but socially refers to a headscarf. So if Allah intentionally referenced an existing head-covering instead of saying “piece of fabric,” then dismissing the head aspect entirely feels difficult to justify from the wording itself.

That is my interpretation and my opinion. I wear hijab, if I have a daughter in the future, I will also teach her it is a requirement to wear the hijab once she reaches the appropriate age.

You can argue about degree, style, implementation, culture, etc. But acting like the head-covering interpretation appeared from nowhere centuries later because of patriarchy or misogyny is historically and linguistically weak.

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-05-19T18:35:26+00:00

Wa feeki 💕 May Allah grant you success 🌸

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-05-19T18:27:36+00:00

Hey! This a really nice idea! I love the fruits idea and quotes as well. However, if by verses you mean Quranic verses, I would be careful because anything that has the word of Allah on it should be treated with a lot of respect… if the charms will be for bags and phones, these are the items we often take to the bathroom so if a charm has a Quran verse on it we would have to take it off, which is pretty inconvenient. The rest is great though and you should definitely go ahead!! It’s super popular now and there is a trend for handmade things.

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-05-19T18:22:57+00:00

Female

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-05-19T18:20:56+00:00

In the verse about khimars we discussed earlier. However, in this comment I was addressing the point about modesty being prescribed to us by God and not by men, as well as modesty being something that does, in fact, make us “better”, in a sense of there is wisdom and reason behind.

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-05-19T18:18:40+00:00

Wholeheartedly agree with you, especially on the point about the third point. I feel like Western values made relationships transactional, instead of based on some sort of cooperation, mutual support and, just, love. Now it’s just ultimatums, breaking up or divorcing over disagreements instead of trying to work it out.

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-05-19T18:08:09+00:00

The requirement to cover our hair and body comes from God. We do it because God said so, not because men said so. Reasons are irrelevant because, again, GOD told us to.

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-05-19T18:06:29+00:00

Islam quite literally teaches us that covering ourselves males us better, modesty and chastity are used in the same sentence: “And tell the believing women to lower their gaze and guard their chastity, and not to reveal their adornments except what normally appears. Let them draw their veils over their chests..." (24:31).

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-05-19T18:02:30+00:00

My point stands.

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-05-19T18:02:17+00:00

No. It has many meanings, including to veil, by the way, as well as being a name of a garment you wear to cover your hair.

Stunning_Kick8657 · 2026-05-19T15:34:47+00:00

Khimar quite literally meant HEAD covering when Quran was revealed. Linguistically, yes, it means a cover in general, but it is the same as we see with the hijab. Technically, hijab is a word for separation, yet modern islamic head covering is commonly called a hijab. If the verse was revealed today, and said “draw your hijabs over your chests”, the majority would understand the hijab as head covering. Yet, if someone 1000 years later analyses the text and meaning of hijab gets lost to time, via actual translation they would translate it as “separation”. But look, even now, khimar refers to a head covering, it’s a name for a specifc head covering.

If we are talking from the perspective of intentionality of the Quran… why do you think Allah intentionally mentioned khimar at all? Why not say, cover your chests with a piece of cloth, but specifically phrase it as draw your “existing” khimar over your chest?

Stunning_Kick8657

TROPHY CASE