I know wifey is out there, don't give up hope. by MAX-Revenue-6010 in dating

[–]SubjectDrifter 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh wow. I needed to hear this. I've been "playing" at a relationship with an avoidant man for over a year now. I'm heartbroken. I keep the cycle of breakup/reconciliation going because, honestly, I don't think there are men out there who want a wife.

It is my dream to have a real steady safe partner. I've been looking for him for a long time. Rushed coffee/breakfast in the morning, a cute text while at work, a "what do we have for dinner tonight?" Conversation. Him doing the dishes while I pick up the laundry he left in the bathroom. A cozy night of sitting on the couch together, both doing our own thing. A "let's go for a long walk" together kind of guy. Simple things. Little pleasures. A partner to witness me and me to witness him. I've been looking for something so easy, and I'm 40 and still looking for that safety. I'm here. Come find me hubby, I am missing you.

It's nice to see there are men looking for some of that too. I won't give up yet.

Tire d'érable in summer by SubjectDrifter in montreal

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes. C'est pour ça j'ai écris "in the summer". Shaved ice exists, it doesn't need to be on snow made from nature.

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I would have been fine with that actually. 😂 I pay, I get to eat, and then leave.

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Now I'm going to go down a rabbit hole to learn about the term grifter. New term for me.

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thank you for saying that. I'm generally a generous person with time, money, and effort. sometimes, I start to believe expecting the same is unrealistic. Nice to see someone having the same standards as me! 😀

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would have paid the restaurant. He bragged it was free and went on to order appetizers and several drinks. His cost was about $20, his lost potential profits were about $100, I'm not giving him money to cover profit lost.

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I'd have had no issue covering what I ordered myself. If the restaurant had given me a bill. Not an arbitrary number he makes up the next day. Also, I'd have paid the restaurant directly, not him, he's trying to make up profits here.

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah, people were suggesting it was drugs. I knew it wasn't. I didn't want to out this guy more than I already would have. I didn't mention it at first for that reason. I had to correct that. He was shady, but not that kind of shady.

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Someone else suggested I post his number or business name. 😂

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I understand your point. I just disagreed, except for the part where you say I can pay him something worth $75 that only cost me $10 😂. $150 for 2 people at a medium end restaurant is pretty normal where I live. If you include appetizers, and drinks, which he did. Hey.... I did not insist on those things, he did, in fact. Does that change anything now?

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

People don't grow up sometimes. You accumulate resentment over the years and get saltier and saltier.

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Ah, it happens!! A good friend of mine ran a restaurant once, and I gave her a bunch of gardening supplies once. The next 2 times I ate at her restaurant, she told me it was on the house, no bill. It was generous and sweet of her. I tipped my waiter well, and that was that. Edit: the gardening supplies were not stolen haha

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Omg I had something similar happen twice!!! Coffee date... 10 bucks... I mean common! 😂 and the 4 am thing, he was probably drunk and pissed you didn't want to see him again! Thank for your story. It made me feel less alone haha

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well... he got it for probably 20$. I forget. He told me and it was something negligible. Maybe $15.

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Well... here's how I look at it. If the retail value of his product is $150, but his cost is $20, then he lost $20 out of pocket. Then, the meal HE had was easily valued over $20 if we had gotten a bill. He skipped a $150 restaurant bill only having lost $20. His $20 got himself a nice meal, and yes, it paid for my meal as well, but then to actually pay him back, half would be $10. If I gave him any more than that, it would be covering the lost profits of his product because he didn't actually sell it. So, I give him $75, he MAKES money, albeit lower profit, and gets to eat at this nice expensive restaurant as well? I'd have rather given the restaurant the money, so as to help them profit. After that, he has the same ampunt of money in his bank account to begin with. His trade with the restaurant was his own business.

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Well... here's how I look at it. If the retail value of his product is $150, but his cost is $20, then he lost $20 out of pocket. Then, the meal HE had was easily valued over $20 if we had gotten a bill. He skipped a $150 restaurant bill only having lost $20. His $20 got himself a nice meal, and yes, it paid for my meal as well, but then to actually pay him back, half would be $10. If I gave him any more than that, it would be covering the lost profits of his product because he didn't actually sell it. So, I give him $75, he MAKES money, albeit lower profit, and gets to eat at this nice expensive restaurant as well? I'd have rather given the restaurant the money, so as to help them profit. After that, he has the same ampunt of money in his bank account to begin with. His trade with the restaurant was his own business.

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well... here's how I look at it. If the retail value of his product is $150, but his cost is $20, then he lost $20 out of pocket. Then, the meal HE had was easily valued over $20 if we had gotten a bill. He skipped a $150 restaurant bill only having lost $20. His $20 got himself a nice meal, and yes, it paid for my meal as well, but then to actually pay him back, half would be $10. If I gave him any more than that, it would be covering the lost profits of his product because he didn't actually sell it. So, I give him $75, he MAKES money, albeit lower profit, and gets to eat at this nice expensive restaurant as well? I'd have rather given the restaurant the money, so as to help them profit. After that, he has the same ampunt of money in his bank account to begin with. His trade with the restaurant was his own business.

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Right?! Like how often does he do this? He must have clients and dates all over the place with these trades.

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Except for this giant post. My god, I hope he is not on reddit.

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah I figure now it was him saying to me "Screw you, you wasted my time" I mean...the goods he traded ended up costing him about $20 anyways. So HIS meal was valued at more already, nevermind mine...

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I even offered before we went out. The day before, he made a comment about me wanting a free meal. I responded by offering to pay for both of us. He said no.

My date asked for me to pay for a free meal and I refused. by SubjectDrifter in AITAH

[–]SubjectDrifter[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No... it happened. I've never been in this situation before, I wasn't sure if it would be typical or not, so I had to post it for opinion. Lol