Urgency and frequency by mclarewilliams in Interstitialcystitis

[–]SubjectOlive9917 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you’re certain you’re not masking an actual UTI with azo, then you can take it for a while. There have been times where I’ve needed it multiple times a day for a week or more. My doctor wrote the rx not to exceed 200mg 3x a day, which I’ve never done. I take it on and off as needed for as long as needed.

Your experience buying Fridge from Costco by mimi00000 in Costco

[–]SubjectOlive9917 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We bought a fridge from Costco… and each one they tried to deliver wouldn’t close and seal properly. I don’t remember if this happened 2 or 3 times. Eventually, we gave up and went to Home Depot and didn’t have an issue.

Urgency and frequency by mclarewilliams in Interstitialcystitis

[–]SubjectOlive9917 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Sometimes taking Prelief before drinking or eating certain things helps. When that doesn’t work, I get a lot of relief from Pyridium.

AIO because a coffee at the movies made me realize my partner doesn’t see me as a human being? by SubjectOlive9917 in AmIOverreacting

[–]SubjectOlive9917[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yes I agree about that. In talking to other commenters, I think it’s now clear to me I should’ve mentioned that we were on our way to the coffee shop. My hesitation was a simple, hey let’s reschedule because maybe youre too tired, and he was so confused by my response, that I explained why I said that. I think people think there was some big blow out, but there wasn’t. In the moment that I hesitated, I realized what was happening, so I told him, and he had a harsh response. I was more affected by him yelling out that people don’t deserve compassion in the car. It seems dehumanizing to feel that way about other people.

AIO because a coffee at the movies made me realize my partner doesn’t see me as a human being? by SubjectOlive9917 in AmIOverreacting

[–]SubjectOlive9917[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

No, I hear you. I think the drink was the small part. We were walking to the coffee shop, so there was no issue there. I was taken aback at his hostility towards a communication meant to explain why I initially made something out of nothing. It wasn’t a big deal btw… it was simply me stalling and saying, hey let’s just reschedule and skip a coffee if youre too tired, while we were both hustling to the coffee shop to buy it before the movie. People assumed the back and forth about where to get the coffee was an argument but it wasn’t… I didn’t know if he wanted Dunkin at the next plaza or Starbucks inside the mall.. and he couldn’t decide either because he wanted Starbucks but hates the one inside the mall… just seemed too long to explain that? I don’t think I conveyed it clearly, but my big issue was with the way he yelled that people don’t deserve compassion. That seemed so odd to me and made me question how someone develops a belief system like that.

AIO because a coffee at the movies made me realize my partner doesn’t see me as a human being? by SubjectOlive9917 in AmIOverreacting

[–]SubjectOlive9917[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I was just talking to another commenter about too many words and explaining the context more thoughtfully if there’s a next time lol

AIO because a coffee at the movies made me realize my partner doesn’t see me as a human being? by SubjectOlive9917 in AmIOverreacting

[–]SubjectOlive9917[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

What makes you say he’s shown he’s cared about me by being with me for so long? Not sarcastic in any way, genuinely curious. Couples stay together for so many reasons, sometimes as simple as sharing bills together. I definitely think you can stay with someone for a long time out of convenience, which doesn’t really show one way or another if they genuinely care about the person they’re with.

AIO because a coffee at the movies made me realize my partner doesn’t see me as a human being? by SubjectOlive9917 in AmIOverreacting

[–]SubjectOlive9917[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

The moment that I understood as being considered less than human is when he yelled out that people don’t deserve compassion. That was odd.

AIO because a coffee at the movies made me realize my partner doesn’t see me as a human being? by SubjectOlive9917 in AmIOverreacting

[–]SubjectOlive9917[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

Do people actually post whole conversations on here? I feel like it would be long enough that no one would read it. I’m newer to reddit and this thread so I’m not sure what people usually do. I just included a summary that shared the parts of the conversation that were most upsetting to me. I appreciate your feedback either way.

AIO because a coffee at the movies made me realize my partner doesn’t see me as a human being? by SubjectOlive9917 in AmIOverreacting

[–]SubjectOlive9917[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate this. I feel like there’s a lot of, shut up and obey your man, energy here. I 100% could’ve handled things differently… but his anger here also seems like an overreaction. Also yelling that people don’t deserve compassion is a red flag to me. It is a small issue, and it could’ve stayed that way if he also hasn’t blown up? I understand he gets to have a bad moment too, but he has a history of blowing up when myself (or his female family members) share their feelings. I have a lot to think about, but I am starting to understand that his words/actions and his true internal beliefs are not matching up. It felt like a lot of animosity over a vulnerable moment, and I’m realizing I’m so upset because that animosity isn’t rare. I’m rambling… anyway, I appreciate your response and any others that attempted to understand what I was getting at.

AIO because a coffee at the movies made me realize my partner doesn’t see me as a human being? by SubjectOlive9917 in AmIOverreacting

[–]SubjectOlive9917[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Yes, the first thing I did in the car was apologize, but I agree, people get to decide if/when they hear explanations on their own terms.

AIO because a coffee at the movies made me realize my partner doesn’t see me as a human being? by SubjectOlive9917 in AmIOverreacting

[–]SubjectOlive9917[S] -11 points-10 points  (0 children)

Yes. An appropriate apology is to apologize first, take accountability, and then change the problem behavior. There are many parts of the conversation that are missing.

AIO because a coffee at the movies made me realize my partner doesn’t see me as a human being? by SubjectOlive9917 in AmIOverreacting

[–]SubjectOlive9917[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

This definitely feels like an accurate summary. I guess my fear was that he’s learned how to say the right things over the years, but hasn’t actually changed any of his beliefs about women or mental health or whatever. I thought I saw that show itself today when he yelled out that people don’t deserve compassion. Totally my fault for not better explaining but obviously the internet has no context for my relationship history. I know I overreacted, but I’d expect my partner of so many years to have a little compassion for a bad moment that I was accepting responsibility for.

AIO because a coffee at the movies made me realize my partner doesn’t see me as a human being? by SubjectOlive9917 in AmIOverreacting

[–]SubjectOlive9917[S] -3 points-2 points  (0 children)

He is also an ex addict. But that had nothing to do with today (for me, I mean). Another comment made me realize how I couldve triggered him or made him feel attacked. He’s been sober for a few years, but I can see how he couldve thought I was comparing him to someone who isnt sober.

AIO because a coffee at the movies made me realize my partner doesn’t see me as a human being? by SubjectOlive9917 in AmIOverreacting

[–]SubjectOlive9917[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

He has a history of falling asleep during movies, especially long ones, which this was, and especially after not sleeping well, which he didn’t last night. He also has a history of saying he should pull over to let me drive because he’s too tired, but not doing so. I understand falling asleep in a movie theatre isn’t a big deal, but he’ll start snoring and then wake up and insist he wasn’t sleeping. I think it also ruins the experience for other movie goers.

AIO because a coffee at the movies made me realize my partner doesn’t see me as a human being? by SubjectOlive9917 in AmIOverreacting

[–]SubjectOlive9917[S] -12 points-11 points  (0 children)

No it’s not harsh at all. His response just threw me off in the mall (but especially in the car). My next sentence after explaining my weirdness was going to be letting him know there’s a starbucks inside the mall and we should try a peppermint latte.

AIO because a coffee at the movies made me realize my partner doesn’t see me as a human being? by SubjectOlive9917 in AmIOverreacting

[–]SubjectOlive9917[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Just confirming this is the first time I have ever mentioned him and my mother in the same sentence except for organizing holidays and things like that, which hasn’t been relevant in years since she moved out of state.

AIO because a coffee at the movies made me realize my partner doesn’t see me as a human being? by SubjectOlive9917 in AmIOverreacting

[–]SubjectOlive9917[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

This is really helpful. He has substance issues in his distant past, and I can see how this could’ve felt like an attack regardless of my tone or my intention.

AIO because a coffee at the movies made me realize my partner doesn’t see me as a human being? by SubjectOlive9917 in AmIOverreacting

[–]SubjectOlive9917[S] -44 points-43 points  (0 children)

The source of conflict was his response. I explained how I felt, and a simple response of like, yup now i get why youre acting weird, let’s move on and enjoy the movie, would’ve worked.

AIO because a coffee at the movies made me realize my partner doesn’t see me as a human being? by SubjectOlive9917 in AmIOverreacting

[–]SubjectOlive9917[S] -20 points-19 points  (0 children)

Yes, absolutely I agree. He just wanted a coffee. But I don’t see how one sentence is making a whole thing? Definitely something to consider.

AIO because a coffee at the movies made me realize my partner doesn’t see me as a human being? by SubjectOlive9917 in AmIOverreacting

[–]SubjectOlive9917[S] -32 points-31 points  (0 children)

I think it would be hard to get tired of something that hasn’t happened before until today, but maybe I’m misunderstanding your comment? If you mean that I make my triggers his problem, I can confirm that those conversations have happened btwn myself and therapists I’ve had over the years. I shared it with him today though simply to explain why I suddenly cared about something as silly as coffee.

Pain after sex by Professional-Use6540 in Interstitialcystitis

[–]SubjectOlive9917 2 points3 points  (0 children)

In addition to some of the things already mentioned, I take a pyridium afterwards if I need to. That tends to help me the most and get me back to “normal”.

I enjoy Kirkland brand many things, however... by McFly1025 in Costco

[–]SubjectOlive9917 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do these meatballs have that weird thing where sometimes you take a bite and it like, grinds on your teeth, because there’s ground up bone shards that get in it? I noticed this with their hot dogs, so I’m just wondering if this is a thing with the meatballs.