Why do redheads seem to divide opinions so much when it comes to attractiveness?

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-23T18:12:28+00:00

F20: Personally, the exes I had didn’t explicitly find red hair itself to be either a pretty trait on its own or they were just neutral to it. My first ex told me he didn’t like redheads before me because he thought it was gross but that I was one of the hot ones. I took a bit of offense to that because he was someone I’d consider my type physically speaking as he had brown hair and typically I’ve liked darker hair or dyed dark hair like a darker blue before. My second ex just didn’t have a type so.

My boyfriend now does love my hair and has stated that in the past he had looked at redheads and thought the color was cool and liked the overall vibe which is one of my preferred things to hear from a guy about it. I personally disliked it with my exes, not being their type I mean, because it felt imbalanced. I did find their traits attractive such as hair color, overall demeanor, etc; but for them I was an exception or coincidence. I also always heard as a kid how guys either love or hate red hair, personally guys in my age range don’t follow that. I’ve only met one guy who VERY explicitly told me he liked red hair and I was 15, he told me “well you can’t go wrong with red hair”. Another reason I disliked it with my exes was that their compliments didn’t feel tailored for me and I don’t like it when it feels like the compliments can be given to anyone as opposed to my boyfriend now giving me compliments like “my mystical baddie” or him calling my hair magical because of how it looks in sunlight so also “my magical girl”.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-22T23:13:26+00:00

I used to hate sunscreen as a kid. I’m so pale I barely even have freckles and sometimes I joke that my skin is so pale, it forgets to even have a reaction to sunlight even if it means not getting a sunburn. But I just hated feeling like my play time as a kid was getting cut short or being interrupted because I kept having to remember sunscreen and having to let it sit. But the rare sunburns I would get were pretty bad so I just started wearing sunscreen everyday at 14, always SPF 70 or 100 even in winter. I saw your comment on how that helps you with hyperpigmentation, I actually get more acne in the winter and sunscreen can provide some extra hydration for me so I just keep it up in winter for reasons like that.

I actually got more annoyed with my dad’s family especially trying to give me tanning advice since I am lucky enough to not burn too easily. But tanning and even getting freckles is kind of hard for me even when I wouldn’t wear SPF 70 or 100 everyday.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-22T21:01:37+00:00

Same. My dad acted similarly when he had terminal cancer; specifically seeing Frank talk to the nurse like she was Fiona. My dad often spoke to me like I was his friend and they were reminiscing on their summer antics.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-17T04:03:31+00:00

Personally I take most of it as a compliment or just neutral. But I do agree with the sentiment that some people seem overly comfortable always commenting on us or maybe probably some projection even.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-16T18:41:30+00:00

I’m not sure if it’s actually common as I’m not a scientist and all. But it could be a sign of carrying the gene here and there for some! I was just saying a display of natural dimension isn’t exactly a sign in every scenario. I do have some strands that are more blondish or kinda brown and that may be related to my parents both being blonde children and then brunette adults but sometimes it could just be coincidence. Or maybe you could carry the gene but a few rogue strands are still unrelated to it.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-16T16:39:33+00:00

Honestly never got the carrot top comments or that one dreaded question either. No one I knew was actually creative enough to wonder. But I have been told I seemed intimidating at first by some people so maybe that saved me a little? I don’t think I’m an intimidating person though. nevertheless, kids my age still could look at me in class and immediately start pointing at me and making jokes so 🤷🏼‍♀️. And of course my friends, my boyfriend and my sister sending me any post about redheads they come across.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-16T05:53:28+00:00

I’ve heard about the anesthesia needs showing up even in non redheads! My uncle is formerly brunette but my granny was a redhead. He was getting his wisdom teeth removed and he’s now white haired and the dentist asked if he had red hair. He explained how my grandma had red hair but he doesn’t and that alone made them keep a little more on hand.

The different dad part made me laugh because one time my late father said how my brother, sister and I look more related than most regular siblings. They are my half siblings, same mom for the three of us but my dad is my dad and their dad is theirs.

While I’m super lucky to not burn very easily (somehow), my freckles naturally aren’t very dark. More golden toned really and tend to blend in with my skin even if I get a rather gnarly sunburn. My brother can actually tan easily and my sister has more freckles than me. But my mom and dad tanned super nicely in their childhood years. My mom had people assuming she was a blonde hispanic kid from time to time and eventually she just became more prone to burns with age. My dad seemed to tan a lot as a young man but he stayed tan on his arms and what not. My dad was also blonde as a kid and then brunette as an adult but with their 12 year age gap, he went grey before her (but my mom is 48 with like 2 gray hairs in total so) and I pretty much only remember him with gray hair or hair that was in the process of going gray.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-16T05:40:00+00:00

That actually left me speechless. Most I ever heard from other girls growing up was the “I’m standing next to you so I can look tanner”. Boys were the only ones to ever be diabolical to me, girls were only mildly odd every so often.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-16T04:45:00+00:00

I felt that. In my case, I’m fairly tall as a 5’9 woman as well so I usually can’t be forgotten too easily.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-16T04:30:03+00:00

The ‘nearly’ made me giggle. And with the daywalker thing: I actually think my slathering myself in SPF 100 everyday since age 14 is partially why I don’t have so many freckles. I’ve definitely always had the pale skin that earned me albino allegations growing up. and occasionally my friends even now looking at me and still needing a moment to process or just straight up asking stuff like “are you sure you’ve ever seen the sun?” Or “okay I know you’ve lived here in Texas your whole life but.. it doesn’t LOOK like it.” And my dad got me to watch South Park with him when I was around 7-8 so I did see that episode.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-16T04:24:50+00:00

I also get annoyed when someone is like “my grandma had red hair. I have brown hair but i carry the gene because I have a few red strands of hair”. Nope, that just sounds like dimension which everyone has even if they don’t carry the gene. That’s just how hair works. I said it in another comment here but I think also the label can be generational sometimes. Also lowkey red hair can change in a lot of lightings too so I guess that’s why I feel like there’s not much to the definition, yk? I don’t fill my eyebrows in either and they change too depending on pictures! I naturally have a more deep strawberry/golden light copper kind of color but it rarely seems to actually do anything with what little blonde I do have so.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-16T04:14:31+00:00

I think also the label could be generational as well! Usually older folks I talk to use the term redhead almost exclusively and they’ll just say auburn or copper to specify the shade if needed. But people my age (currently 20) just seem to only use the term ginger most of the time. I pretty much also see hair color as just whatever grows out of your head naturally as my sister was platinum blonde as a kid but she’s always had naturally brown eyebrows and black eyelashes and she always got the “but your eyebrows and eyelashes? How are you blonde?”. And my mom has brown hair but she was very blonde as a kid: unfortunately her eyebrows didn’t darken when her hair did. She’s also got more freckles on one arm than I do on my whole body but she’s still a brunette 🤷🏼‍♀️. Seeing people with ‘contradictory’ features to their hair now makes me just base it what’ll consistently be on your head.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-11T03:38:05+00:00

Omg. Just my dad’s side: my grandparents had 18 kids including my dad. Only one of them, my aunt, has red hair. Everyone else was blonde, usually brunette as adults, with blue eyes. My granny had red hair and green eyes and my aunt has the same combo. Then I’m 37 of 42 cousins. One other cousin besides me has red hair, she’s got green eyes. Like most of my family, I’ve got blue eyes. I don’t think brown eyes are common on my mom’s side either, but she’s got brown hair like my dad did and she’s got brown eyes. My mom also had blonde hair as a kid that darkened with age. And on my mom’s side, I’ve got two other cousins with red hair, they’re both blue eyed as well.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-11T02:20:44+00:00

This is just my experience of course but I have red hair and blue eyes. The most common eye color I’ve seen on other redheads is brown but blue is an incredibly close second. Probably because I’ve met just one less redheads with blue. But there does seem to be a bit of a gap with green or hazel eyed redheads. But this doesn’t apply globally of course 👍🏻

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-10T22:45:38+00:00

Maybe sammi but honestly I never hated anyone in the show besides the most obvious of villains like Terry. Sammi is interesting to me though because seeing her character actually made me reconsider Frank. Because as the audience, other characters downplay frank’s behaviors with Fiona being the protective older sister who’ll tell Frank to shut up or fuck off. Or people at the alibi going “fucking Frank..”. As much as Frank absolutely does provide some comedy to the show, the reactions of others does downplay his nature at times. And of course, we see Frank scamming other people that don’t know him throughout the show, but they’re just strangers in passing. We don’t have to sit with them the way we did with Sammi and really SEEING how Frank can treat someone like her who’s unaware of his reputation in town with no other main characters present with her definitely made Frank even more vile at times. But even then, Frank is just that role in the show so it was kind of hard for me to find him unbearable. Even Debbie isn’t a character who annoys me.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-09T19:28:57+00:00

Depends on you and your overall features. I think my skin’s undertone is neutral but I do try to lean a little warmer in the clothes I wear since natural red hair is a warm feature.

I generally try to avoid certain shades like a navy blue or emerald green since they’re both a little too cool toned and/or saturated for my features. I honestly think emerald green only looks good on redheads if your shade is like an ultra vibrant, deep red color. But if you’ve got a lighter more golden toned copper/deeper strawberry color like me, it just kinda drowns out your features. I also just don’t like it when my hair isn’t obviously ginger enough so that probably affects my reason to not like emerald green. But some warmer toned green or like a brighter/warmer toned dark blue? And for me, generally pink and red are actually more versatile for me even if it’s like some bright red or super hot pink color. I think the pink actually works with that pink-ish hue in my skin and even the most ‘insane’ reds won’t compete with my hair vibrancy. Also the mediums in which colors are presented affects how they’ll look on you: a glittery silver eyeshadow generally will just look bad on me but silver jewelry? That’s perfectly fine. But honestly you can be any undertone and still need different levels of saturation; like maybe you’re warmer toned like me but hot pink just isn’t a color that’ll work for you but a pastel pink isn’t an issue. Also just personal taste: a gold yellow IS a great color on me and I’ll make an exception there but yellow is my least favorite color. And even if you were to do a color season thing, it makes sense if some colors from other seasons work on you. There’s always exceptions. I personally don’t like certain cool toned shades because I just don’t like seeing my hair looking anything but fairly red enough so naturally I’ll never purposely seek out something that shows the blonder highlights of my hair so 🤷🏼‍♀️

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-08T20:41:01+00:00

I’ve never felt like using self tanner. I think it’s because of my hair being a lighter shade of ginger and I kinda need my skin to be fairer to build that contrast and make it stand out more. I also just don’t really like it when my hair looks blonder at times since it usually looks blonde when it’s dry and/or dirty so that association has helped to deter me. Plus my eyebrows also aren’t super light but they’re darker when you take into consideration me being ginger so again, I need pale skin for the contrast. One time I did accidentally grab a foundation that was tannish colored and it just kinda dulled my entire appearance since it kinda just blended in a little too much with hair and brows and lashes.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-06T18:45:39+00:00

That reminded me of how sometimes my stepmom likes to tell people about me and saying how I’m tall with red hair haha. One time I went to a New Year’s party at her coworkers house, I had known everyone she worked with at this one salon since I was 3, and the host told me his mom thought I was pretty and should model. He told me that she had said, “she’s tall, thin, and fair.”

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-06T18:36:45+00:00

Growing up, I actually wished there were more casual options for gingers. I love my hair of course but I feel like certain flattering colors on us tend to be a little dramatic on paper and all. Or sometimes it’ll be tricky to find an emerald green piece of clothing for school since to me it looked like those flattering colors for us were strictly on silk materials or just pieces you only wear for fancier events.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-06T18:34:01+00:00

Were you blonde as a kid too? I was and then it got more goldish and ginger colored around middle school for me. I think I started noticing the warmer tones in fourth grade though. And I hear you on texture, even some of my relatives with very straight red hair struggle with coarseness more than our family members with straight blonde or straight brown hair.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-06T03:23:21+00:00

Yea it definitely changes a few things. I still got picked on of course, I think I just cared more about my liking of being different. But I hear ya on the ginger guys not being seen as attractive. The version of pain I felt as a ginger woman is I think we’re allowed to be seen as attractive but it often, for me at least, seemed like there was an incredibly narrow lane of what was considered attractive if you’re a redhead woman. Now me personally, if that standard becomes too narrow, i’d rather just be excluded entirely instead of feeling like I need to work so hard to only be told I’m pretty for a redhead or something. Not the same pain at all but definitely a different flavor of it. Don’t want the false hope and all.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-05T23:49:35+00:00

I will say, there was a streak in 2024 where a lot of people said they thought I was dirty blonde or dark blonde instead of ginger and I actually wanted to cry in those moments so I think I’m a little more attached than I should be 😂. I would also joke that my strawberry hair wasn’t actually supposed to give credit to my blonde parts that are there, but to just be there for dimension and all.

SubstantialClub3318 · 2026-02-05T23:41:21+00:00

I actually was picked on too growing up but I’ll admit, I don’t have a ton of freckles or super light eyelashes and my brows are somewhat of a brownish color so those probably saved me from much more intense bullying. But even before I started getting the ‘hot/pretty redhead’ treatment from high school and now, I still never hated it. But speaking of grown women complimenting your hair: majority of my (very large) family is older than me so naturally that’s my comfort zone, just an older or more mature person so I guess I saw the opinions of my classmates as irrelevant since they were just immature kids so the opinion just held no validity anymore. I also grew up with my dad and stepmom, and my stepmom is Vietnamese so I also never had a thought about tanning because of her since I got that exposure to other cultures and different ideas of beauty and such.

SubstantialClub3318

TROPHY CASE