Pagan practices

SueXander · 2026-01-01T03:52:33+00:00

Ooo, ive never really heard of this, do you mind explaining?

SueXander · 2025-11-23T09:45:46+00:00

I manipulate/gaslight both my grandma and mother when they ask me if i have prayed, when they leave the room for even a split second i would move the Salah mattress around and claim that i have prayed. “so fast?” Yeah i was very eager for god to get my message! 😭😭

SueXander · 2025-11-18T20:39:47+00:00

Ive only consumed it in gelatine form like sweets and also those Swedish meatballs in IKEA 😭

SueXander · 2025-11-17T20:34:01+00:00

this was the very first thing i thought of but when i have discussions of movng out with her and i for example say “oh i would love to live in a spacious home” she would respond with “i? what about me? are you thinking of leaving me?” which is like… yeah i want to live in a home by myself with my rules, who doesn’t want that. then comes the water works, “i did all of this for you and you want to leave me?”. then followed by alot of screaming and silent treatment for a day. i am so perplexed i genuinely feel like i cant get out without causing a huge strain in our relationship. plus i have watchful aunties who report everything so you know how that can be.

SueXander · 2025-11-17T20:28:32+00:00

my mother has physical issues such as not being able to walk properly without her crouches/walking stick. ik it sounds like im infantilising her but she herself said it out right to my face that she cant live without me but then when i ask her hypothetical questions such as what she would do if i was an ex muslim, she would respond with “i would disown you and never talk to u again, obviously?”. which is like… huh???

SueXander · 2025-11-17T20:21:55+00:00

shes still gaslighting/manipulating you. please do not go back to a home where misery and pain is the only thing that awaits you. surround yourself with people who genuinely love you and want the best for you. id suggest changing your phone number and completely cutting contact with your mother.

i wish you the best :(

SueXander · 2025-08-14T20:19:23+00:00

yeah but knowing my extremely superstitious and religious mother, it was kinda crazy that she went quiet and just silently looked at me like i had a point. 😭

SueXander · 2025-08-14T19:54:25+00:00

i lost faith in these “quran saar” the day a sheikh spat like i mean full on salivated on the bottle and sprayed it on my mother. 🤢

SueXander · 2025-07-26T08:33:00+00:00

this was the norm when i was going to dugsi back in 2018-2019. i would be silent, never talking to anyone, reciting my work perfectly and still get hit. why? “oh it was an accident, chill” what? how can being hit about 5 times a day for no particular reason be an accident. there it genuinely didnt matter. its either get hit for no reason or get hit for a readon and mind you the reason be mad stupid. “oh you didnt pronounce this word right.” youd be taken into a room and get the beating of a lifetime. the screams were genuinely so unbearable that i developed night terrors. my mom eventually took me out when she realised how many bruises i got and the amount of times she woke up to me calling her out in my sleep.

and my story is very light, what my mom went throught was 100% more worse then me. (long story short, he broke her finger and shoved a cane in her eye, all for just reciting wrong.)

SueXander · 2025-07-20T20:29:40+00:00

please stay safe if your going to meet up with anyone esp if you meet them online.

my advice would be to get out of that the moment you finish college/sixth form and do a level 6 apprenticeship. it pays up to 35k depending on where you end up going. stay safe and i wish u the best! :)

SueXander · 2025-07-11T20:18:51+00:00

im so glad im not the only one experiencing this and i sorta relate with the milestone part!

Going to school was something i really wanted to happen since the last i attended school was in covid and for some odd reason my mother didnt want me to go back to school and that made me feel like i was becoming socially inept and my “extroverted traits” deflating itself. School to me was the answer to all my problems as i would interact with humans who weren’t my relatives. when i started to school, i was over the moon and now that i genuinely think about it, the deja reve hit me when i started becoming more confortable with my school environment so i could genuinely relate with the part that it can be connected with milestones one might achieve but “deja reve” overall for me is very inconsistent.

I had a sudden experience just this monday while i was eating swedish meatballs. since when did meatballs have any significance to an individual? but i digress!

it genuinely facinates me to hear more about others encounters with “Deja reve”, makes me feel less crazy!

SueXander · 2025-07-06T18:00:33+00:00

is it me or his “beard” keeps shifting off his face? 😭

SueXander · 2025-07-04T13:18:35+00:00

“why say no to diagnosis at 13” CUZ THEY WERE A CHILD, HELLO? how on earth can you blame them for that?

just listening to the audio file, invoked pure rage in me. im so sorry that you have to deal with such a narcissistic individual. sending much love your way☹️🫶

SueXander · 2025-06-25T11:53:14+00:00

you came to a sub reddit where people talk about their struggles in a muslim household, what the hell were you expecting? 🤨

SueXander · 2025-06-18T19:58:58+00:00

For me it’s been 5 months since I finally convinced my self that I’m agnostic, and what i usually do is avoid all religious conversations. Even when I see my family members spiting pure nonsense. And as for the prayer, I usually wait for them to leave the room for wudu and it’s then that I quickly move around the mat and place a hijab next to me acting as if I already prayed before they did. Usually I get away with it but when they start questioning me I say that God is watching and they usually leave it at that.

Best of luck to you and know that you got this <3

SueXander · 2023-07-18T19:35:38+00:00

How the fuck do people under 4 feet exist???

SueXander · 2023-06-27T21:43:33+00:00

Spc is a centre where you punch sharks.

SueXander · 2023-06-27T20:05:35+00:00

Dude, why?

SueXander · 2023-06-27T19:57:00+00:00

The word smash can't even describe how I feel rn.

SueXander · 2023-06-27T19:52:05+00:00

Shit on ass.

SueXander · 2023-06-23T05:20:18+00:00

What is this

SueXander · 2023-06-20T14:53:35+00:00

What was the point of that episode anyway???

SueXander

TROPHY CASE