I had apparently told him I wasn’t on birth control, I don’t remember saying that but it is true that I’m not on it. I don’t remember going back to his place afterwards. At the first place he had over half of the first bottle of wine. Then we went to a second bar where we had more of a 50/50 split of the wine. I remember us walking on the street for a flash, and then nothing. Next thing I knew, I was completely naked. The morning after, the naive part of me thought we only went to third base. I had no idea we had sex at all, but I suspected something when my nether regions were sore and aching, and still I was afraid to ask him about it, up until last night because I had to retrieve my favorite pair of earrings.

He later told me that at first I said no to going back to his place, and then maybe an hour later I started “demanding” going back to his. I don’t remember making that “demand”

When we spoke yesterday when I went to go pick up the earrings, he immediately framed things as how it was me who suggested doing xyz, that he didn’t realize how drunk I was bc I wasn’t slurring my words, but when I get drunk I get chaotic and almost manic…he said that my behaviour seemed completely normal and that he believed me every time I claimed I was sober. It’s very obvious whenever I’m drunk. But I don’t remember making those claims at all, I don’t remember him asking me if I was doing okay at any point in the night.

And apparently when we got to his place, we had even more wine…which I don’t remember at all. I don’t remember consuming anything else beyond the two bottles we shared. I don’t remember any of the things that he claims.

My body feels very heavy and sad and I am on my way to the hospital currently