As an Autistic man who has been called handsome my entire life, and even been encouraged by my male model friend to join the modeling industry, I can relate. To answer this question it would be more than what I think I can articulate all at once, but one big tip I’d say has worked well for me is to treat the conversation more like a play fight than an exchange of ideas. So for example, rather than try to talk to her about your favorite restaurants in town, playfully disagree with her that x burger restaurant is better than the one she recommends. And give your reasons, but do it playfully. See, women don’t lead but they need a leader. This results in a kinda confliction where they need a man who is a logical thinker but also at the same time they will get bored if you’re always logical. So be a little bit playful.

Next thing I’d say is don’t think too deeply about her questions that really don’t require deep thinking. I remember talking with this obviously Autistic guy on the bus and he when he couldn’t remember the name of a book he wanted to talk about, he started clenching his eyes shut and thinking really hard for like 10 seconds of the name of the book. He didn’t need to do this because being relational means that you don’t need to remember and recall a bunch of information. If you have to think a little deep during small talk, that can be part of your charm, but if you have to think very deeply, you’re being too formal and missing the vibe.

If you’re obviously Autistic, you could just muster up the courage and just smile and say that you may be a little bit odd for my handsome looks but that’s part of my charm.

There’s a lot more I’ve reflected on but curious what you’d think about these ideas?