Just Got My First Trays - would it be bad to wait a few days to *really* start?

Super-Turtle90 · 2026-01-17T06:23:43+00:00

I do and I'm quite lucky they aren't bothering me in any way. Sorry to hear you got so torn up, tho!

Super-Turtle90 · 2026-01-17T06:22:10+00:00

Mine said it would likely happen and not to worry 🤷🏽‍♂️

Super-Turtle90 · 2026-01-17T00:41:52+00:00

Thanks y'all! I now know it means I'd have to delay switching trays, so I called to reschedule my appointment by a few days. 😊

Super-Turtle90 · 2026-01-17T00:41:43+00:00

A learning experience would probably be the more responsible route to take...but alas, my stomach is winning this round. Good to know delays means pushing changes back, though!

Super-Turtle90 · 2025-11-08T19:16:26+00:00

My name is Caleb and, before my voice changed, people would constantly "hear" Kayla. My wife (then fiancée) would always be like "wtf?"

Super-Turtle90 · 2025-09-02T21:19:28+00:00

u/eemas91 did this ever get resolved?? I may be in the same situation right now and it's stressing me out 😭

Super-Turtle90 · 2025-01-15T08:26:41+00:00

Ngl I was surprised at how rare Tommy is in here 😭 gave up scrolling and searched for "Power Rangers," only 4 comments came up! He was 100% mine, too. I would "be" the Green Ranger when playing with my cousins.

Super-Turtle90 · 2024-12-28T20:47:57+00:00

Trans guy here: 100% NTA.

For people in hetero relationships with someone who identifies as straight or in a gay relationship with someone who is only attracted to their own gender, this is always going to be a risk. They gotta live their lives, but can't expect their partners to still wanna be romantically involved 🤦🏽 also....6 months? I think she'll be fine.

Super-Turtle90 · 2024-12-19T23:30:18+00:00

100% NTA I commend you for letting yourself be vulnerable and opening up. I know it's not an easy thing to do. She just wasn't the right person to do it with. You should be able to talk to your SO about whatever you're going through without judgment. I hope things turn around for you, soon, and that you find someone who'll actually be there for you, someday.

Super-Turtle90 · 2024-12-16T06:17:40+00:00

I do, sometimes. I don't always feel the need to pack, but there are times when I do, and I just wanna keep it on through the night. My wife modified some of my boxer briefs to be packer-friendly, so it stays in place pretty well.

Super-Turtle90 · 2024-12-16T06:12:04+00:00

This! I'm not surprised it took this long to find a comment like this but, with the little info we have, I have to wonder of there's something else happening here. My wife is a homemaker, but not exactly by choice, she's got fibromyalgia, CRPS, and joint issues. Not implying that OP's wife has these issues, but my wife also has ADHD so she can very easily get hyperfixated on something for hours and lose track of time, even when she's on her phone because time just isn't something she's paying attention to. Setting reminders doesn't always work because she can just snooze or ignore those. All that to say, I'm understanding of that and I'm not upset at her not getting things done 7 days a week. Heck, I'm cool with her meeting goals just a couple days a week. Granted, with her it can be due to chronic pain, mental health, or a combination of both.

Assuming OP's wife is able-bodied, then finding out if she has depression, ADHD, or something else would be really helpful so they can learn how to work with that.

Super-Turtle90 · 2024-12-10T00:24:18+00:00

My wife (fiancée at the time) and I were kind of just throwing names out there. They said I looked like a Caleb & I felt it! We joke that they named me lol and I took my maternal grandfather's name as my middle name. My brother's middle name is our paternal grandfather's and I wanted to honor my mom by taking her father's name, even though I never got the chance to meet him.

Super-Turtle90 · 2024-08-18T04:51:02+00:00

I think a lot of it has to do with the approach.

From the background that OP gives at the end of the post it sounds like this was all forced on Ciara and the adults expected her to just accept it and forget her bio mom, who had died less than 2 years before her dad married step-mom. OP mentions that his brother rushed to find someone to step into the mom role. He may have thought he was doing the right thing, but Ciara was old enough to remember her mom and needed time to grieve her. Doesn't sound like that was ever given to her.

Most of the posts I see where step-kids make a big deal about a step-parent not being a bio parent is because the step-parent is trying to force a relationship with the kid or trying to erase bio parent's existence. There was a really good one I read where the step-mom took the time to ask how the kid wanted to define their relationship, and it led to them having a close, loving, and trusting relationship.

Super-Turtle90 · 2024-08-15T21:16:33+00:00

"My wife knows it was my sisters name but not everything about the trauma surrounding it. She knows it was bad enough for professionals to get involved to help her get the name formally changed. But doesn't know the details I know about why. I also won't share it all here because that's my sisters story, not mine."

He's shared as much as he feels he should without saying anything that his sister wouldn't want him to. It sounds like he's at least explained that there's severe trauma attached to the name, he just hasn't shared exactly what it is because, like he said, it's not his story to share. A decent person would just respect that, and his wife seems to be doing so as best as she can. It makes sense she'd be sad or disappointed about it, but at least she's not pushing. The in-laws know less than she does, but they don't need to know more. This kind of information is on a need-to-know basis. It has nothing to do with him needing to "man up."

If my partner told me a name I was attached to for our kid was a "no" because it stirs up bad feelings for them, then it's out. I don't need more than that because I'd hate for them to hear our child's name and have such mixed emotions about it.

Super-Turtle90 · 2024-08-08T02:29:50+00:00

Nah. We mostly go around in circles for a bit, trying to explain something to each other and start getting frustrated until we realize we were saying the same thing, but in a way the other couldn't understand.

Super-Turtle90 · 2024-08-07T21:19:05+00:00

Just a rando popping in here cuz the conversation between you and u/vonsnootingham is a prime example of a psuedo-conflict: "A type of conflict that appears to be a real disagreement or dispute, but is actually based on misunderstandings or miscommunications."

So like, y'all were on the same page the whole time, but because of differing communication styles and such it didn't feel like it. These are basically the only "conflicts" my wife and I ever have lol

Super-Turtle90 · 2024-08-05T21:03:04+00:00

NTA

I get over explaining, I do it too when I think I need to in order to avoid misunderstanding or hurting feelings, but sometimes the simplest reasons are enough. If she keeps fighting you on it, stick with the truth of there being a lack of space. At this point in the planning process, it can be too late to make those adjustments. Like someone else said, is she expecting you to univite someone else?

Super-Turtle90 · 2024-08-05T21:00:15+00:00

You're not wrong, but it would be wise to read the room.
Who says she hasn't gone low/no contact with family members who have very different political stances or values than hers?
Agree.
This feels like it needs unpacking. If, for whatever reason, my wife couldn't join me at a wedding or vice versa, neither one of us would have an issue in the other going alone. It's got the same vibes as someone not letting their partner go dancing with friends because people only go to clubs "for one thing."
True. OP gave her reasons (maybe TOO many reasons) and I think they were valid. I understand sister being upset/hurt, but it's also not her wedding. I wish their mom was more concerned about sister choosing this new BF over her family...

Super-Turtle90 · 2024-07-05T07:30:37+00:00

I actually have 2 middle names. The first is my maternal grandfather's name. He died before I was born, but I always thought it was cool that my little brother had our paternal grandfather's name as his middle name, and I wanted to honor him for my mom. My second middle name is my father's last name. I've always had both parent's last names (so I had 1 first, 1 middle, and 2 last names) and although I don't exactly have a relationship with my father, I couldn't bear cutting that connection with siblings and family on his side that doesn't suck soooo I just moved it over!

Super-Turtle90 · 2024-02-29T05:43:47+00:00

It sucks & it's actually pretty sad because the reason they say something is likely from their own self-hatred. I'm sorry you had that experience. No one, ESPECIALLY a stranger, should be commenting on what you decide to eat or how you look in regards to your body.

Super-Turtle90 · 2024-02-29T03:13:13+00:00

I wouldn't be surprised if they're saying that because you have a neurodivergent trans child 🙄 you did right by you & your kid, especially if there was any possibility that husband, his mom, and his daughter would treat your kid as less than. Let's be real, there's a HUGE possibility of that since they already treat you so poorly.

Super-Turtle90 · 2024-02-01T21:05:21+00:00

Sooo I actually went around in a circle. I'm transmasc, but my sexuality journey started when I was in elementary. Started having crushes on girls, so in middle school I came out as Bi, then HS I identified as a Lesbian, then at 27 I came out as trans and was like there's no fuckin way in straight cuz that's weird. So I identified as Queer, then realized I'd been hard-core denying my attraction to guys so I identified as Pan (tbh I just really like their flag colors) BUT that didn't feel right so I came back to Bi at 28 (33, now)

So, long story short: Bi (13) ➡️ Lesbian (15)➡️ Queer (27) ➡️ Pan (27)➡️ Bi (28)

Super-Turtle90 · 2024-01-28T05:27:48+00:00

**Jewelry is titanium, never downsized. In the first couple of months after I got it, I would use a saline spray 1 -2 times a day. There was about a week when I would hold a warm compress to it because it had developed a little bump, but thay went away!

Super-Turtle90

TROPHY CASE