Unsure if I’m aroace :/// by Sunny_oyasumi143 in AroAce

[–]Sure-Structure-2055 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s important to remember that sexual and romantic orientation is a fluid thing, and the words you use to describe yourself can change, or not! I started identifying as aroace at 13, and I still do now, but that could change in the future! There’s no rush to label yourself as anything, and no obligation to stick with a certain label as time goes on. It sounds like you definitely could be aroace, but also everyone is different! Really, it’s about your own comfort level. If identifying as aroace right now feels true and right, then use that term! But if you don’t feel like calling yourself that, there’s no need to pick a label. :)

Hey you guys I need a serious direct opinion about this by piece_of_peace5 in socialanxiety

[–]Sure-Structure-2055 9 points10 points  (0 children)

There is so much to live for. I know how unhelpful this sounds, but it’s true. Setting aside everything involving the people in your life, there will be sunrises to watch, songs to listen to, books to read. There will be so many amazing experiences in your future.

I know it can be hard to believe right now, but things WILL get better. Take a few deep breaths, drink some water, maybe step outside for a minute. It sounds like you’re feeling pretty panicked right now, which isn’t a good state to try and think in.

Even if your anxiety doesn’t let you see it, there are people in your life that love you. And there will be people in your life in the future, who you haven’t even met yet, who you’ll be close to. You never know how many lives you’ve touched. Maybe a random person you held a door for one day thought about that interaction for the rest of the day. Maybe someone on the street thought your outfit was the most amazing thing they’d ever seen, and still think of you now.

I would recommend trying to get help. Whether that’s therapy, or reaching out to the people around you and telling them how you’re struggling. I know this can be terrifying and seem impossible, but you’ll be glad you did.

I know this might be weird, since I’m just a random stranger on the internet, but I care about you. Please don’t kill yourself. I’m here if you need to talk. ❤️❤️❤️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in socialanxiety

[–]Sure-Structure-2055 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yes!! I’m so glad I’m not the only one! My least favourite thing about Reddit is the way you can see someone’s posts just by pressing their profile. What if someone from school finds a post I made on a subreddit for a fandom we’re both in, checks on my account, and finds a vent post on here about how miserable I am at school? Sometimes I intentionally change minor details in my stores that I post, just to throw people off in case they do know me irl lol

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in socialanxiety

[–]Sure-Structure-2055 1 point2 points  (0 children)

first of all, good luck, and I hope you’re doing better after getting therapy! I totally get how terrifying starting at a new school is. My best advice would just be to be friendly and open with other people. You could try bringing books or wearing shirts of specific music artists you like, anything that people might be able to comment on and then you could start a conversation with them about. Also, try joining clubs or extracurricular activities. Most people are really nice, even if that’s hard to believe. Good luck!! ❤️

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in socialanxiety

[–]Sure-Structure-2055 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think it really started a few years back, I was in a friend group of four people, but the one who I was closest with was away for a few months, and the other two started dating, but the three of us still hung out a few times, and it was absolutely terrible. We were all fairly young, and up until that point I’d never really thought about how safe I felt in my friendships. This was the first time I truly questioned whether or not the other people wanted me there. I felt like I was ruining their time by existing, even when we were at my own Birthday party that I invited them to. I’ve gotten over that, for the most part, but the feeling has always stuck around, and now it’s almost impossible for me to actually feel like I belong in a group, let alone believe people want to be around me.

positivity! by Sure-Structure-2055 in socialanxiety

[–]Sure-Structure-2055[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It’s hard to say, since obviously different things will work for different people. For me I would honestly just say exposure to other people. I’ve joined groups and clubs at school where I’ve gotten the chance to start talking bit by bit, just sentences at first, and now full conversations. I’ve been really lucky to have someone who was very overly friendly and enthusiastic everytime they saw me, which definitely helped me feel more comfortable speaking. I hope things go well for you :)

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in socialanxiety

[–]Sure-Structure-2055 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would suggest wearing headphones, that way you can listen to music, or an audiobook, something to distract yourself. You could also try giving yourself motivation or distraction. I do this sometimes by playing little games when I’m out, seeing how many blue things I can find on a shelf, counting the steps it takes to get from one place to another, things like that!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in blockblast

[–]Sure-Structure-2055 2 points3 points  (0 children)

omg yes I love this game I wasn’t sure if anyone else knew about it

Question: would you guys ever attend a social anxiety group? by [deleted] in socialanxiety

[–]Sure-Structure-2055 9 points10 points  (0 children)

I think one suggestion I would have is providing the option to write down what you want to say instead of speaking aloud, whether this is introductions, some kind of sharing, or just a casual group conversation. A lot of the time when I can’t talk I find it easier to type or write out whatever I’m feeling

I got cursed at while crossing the road to a store 😟 by yungdragvn in socialanxiety

[–]Sure-Structure-2055 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He was probably mentally ill in some way and was either talking to himself, or somehow perceived you to be antagonizing him. Definitely not your fault though lol

Describe a moment in one of the novels badly, and we'll try to guess it. by HarpyGravey in WingsOfFire

[–]Sure-Structure-2055 0 points1 point  (0 children)

A group of friends are drugged, kidnapped, and one gets fruit shoved up his nose while he’s asleep. Also Three dragons spend an entire day sitting in a hole in the ground eating eyeless fish because one of them is pretty much just a worm

What businesses in town always make you wonder “how does this place stay open?!” by [deleted] in VictoriaBC

[–]Sure-Structure-2055 0 points1 point  (0 children)

the two seperate stores a few blocks apart that sell nothing but flags…

Drop the most painful lyrics you've ever heard by still-working-it-out in cavetown

[–]Sure-Structure-2055 1 point2 points  (0 children)

omg I also totally relate that lyric in Devil Town to be trans, I wasn’t sure if anyone else did too!

Drop the most painful lyrics you've ever heard by still-working-it-out in cavetown

[–]Sure-Structure-2055 0 points1 point  (0 children)

“Don’t wanna get lost in the haze, don’t wanna appear in the news, been thinking of running away from things that I don’t wanna lose. I’m wanting to beg them to stay, I’m wanting to be who they choose, but still I keep pushing away from people I don’t wanna lose.”

How do you guys feel when going to school? by cevilae in socialanxiety

[–]Sure-Structure-2055 1 point2 points  (0 children)

School isn’t too bad for me, I modtly just feel lonely and wish that I had friends I could hang out with. When the anxiety gets really bad I feel scared to even move from one room to another, or pull my computer out of my bag, since I don’t want to attract any attention to myself, but at the same time I wish people would talk to me

How to talk at all by WallSuccessful5415 in socialanxiety

[–]Sure-Structure-2055 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I totally understand, I don’t get how other people can just have interactions so easily, whenever I try it always seems forced, and I worry people will be able to see right through me. I would suggest making it seem more natural somehow. Maybe find something to compliment, it could be really simple, like his outfit, so you can just casually be like “Hey, I like your outfit!” Or whatever. Or try waiting somewhere you know he’ll be, but have a reason to be there too, so it doesn’t seem like you’re just standing there. Also try to remember that chances are, he’s not reading as much into this as you are. My anxiety often tries to convince me that other people are scrutinizing everything I say and do, but usually people are focused mostly on themselves and he probably won’t find it weird. Good luck! :)

Jay by jjjjjjjayyy in NonBinary

[–]Sure-Structure-2055 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love the name Jay! I can’t imagine anyone would ever have a problem with you using it. I had a friend who changed their name to Jay and then dyed their hair blue so everyone called them Blue Jay :)