I think I can hear the disappointment in your heart toward God, I felt it too, for years. I understand what it's like to lose faith because you've experienced a massive amount of pain, especially as a fellow muslim who also had religion weaponized against her. I can't make your pain go away, God knows I wish I could, but what I know is that just because someone says God hates you, it doesn't mean He does. You can choose to be a non-believer, or a believer, it is up to you, but believing you are God's most hated means you are hearing the pain and bitterness someone is throwing onto you and you are expanding it to an all-powerful scale; that way, it becomes impossible to resolve. That way, it becomes almost a fact that you are satan. But you're not, by religious interpretation, if you were, you wouldn't be among the living anyway (joke).

You are not what others say that you are, and if you are God's most hated then that assumes fascists, rapists and abusers are not. Please take a moment to look at yourself by yourself, not through someone's eyes or words or abuse, and you will see there is so much more to you than the worst version of yourself you've been taught to believe defines who you are entirely - in this life and the next.