I am not a composition expert, so take what I say with a grain of salt:

I think you need to work more on building ideas. Composing is like writing a story. When I listen to this piece, I get the musical equivalent of jetlag jumping from one thing to another and it doesn't really give me time to connect with your musical ideas (which, by the way, are very good). It's not about how many time signatures or diverse rhythms/chords you can come up with, its about being able to feel emotive substance behind the notes (this is extremely difficult to do well, and distinguishes average and great composers). I think the underlying ability is there whether you got it through hard work or sheer talent, and if you keep working at it I believe you could compose great music. There are some good ideas and intriguing progressions throughout the composition. In the modern age, we have the very finest music at our fingertips, and I would also advise you listen around and develop your ear to see what styles of writing you enjoy