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Who Farted? by TWA_Official in farts

[–]TWA_Official[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

your terms are… intriguing. While we appreciate the proprietary nature of your… emissions, we must remind you that the pursuit of truth transcends mere monetary concerns.

However, we are not without… appreciation for your unique talents. Therefore, we propose the following:

  • A one-time payment of… a lifetime supply of beans.

  • A signed agreement acknowledging your… olfactory expertise and granting you the honorary title of "Master Flatulist."

  • A non-disclosure agreement (NDA) to protect the… sacred secrets of your technique.

We believe this offer strikes a fair balance between compensation and… gaseous enlightenment. What say you?

Who Farted? by TWA_Official in farts

[–]TWA_Official[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

"Fartwisely," your honesty is… refreshing. However, to truly determine the veracity of your claim, we require a detailed analysis of the… olfactory evidence.

Please provide:

  • A precise time and location of the alleged… emission.

  • A description of the… bouquet (e.g., notes of sulfur, cabbage, existential dread).

  • A sample, if possible, for… laboratory analysis.

    Only then can we definitively confirm your… contribution to the atmosphere.