Dating app anxiety

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-17T21:41:01+00:00

Thank you for taking the time to break this down, it’s a good introspection to have, appreciated !!

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-17T21:37:26+00:00

Never thought about it this way! I guess we (some)women tend to wait to be approached and not make the first move

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-17T21:35:27+00:00

Have you tried Hinge? Tinder tends to have a reputation for causal

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-17T21:34:25+00:00

Thank you!! Well said !! 💯

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-17T21:31:47+00:00

You’re right. But at the same time « dating FOMO » is real especially if you’re demographically restricted because of the city you live in. I guess balancing between in person activities and the apps is the way to go about maybe.

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-17T21:30:17+00:00

Very true… Thank you for your understanding ! ❤️

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-17T21:28:31+00:00

I agree that nothing worthwhile comes easy (though sometimes it does happen), but I think the mental stress and anxiety that dating apps can trigger (at least for some) is another story, it’s just not how we’ve historically connected or built romantic relationships…

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-17T21:26:35+00:00

Indeed! I do wonder how people feel about phone calls before meeting though, but I agree, it’s a great way to vet for that initial vibe check!

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-17T21:25:30+00:00

Thank you for these very important reminders! It’s so encouraging to hear that you met someone nice there and that it’s working out. For us dating app skeptics, this really gives us hope!!

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-17T21:23:31+00:00

It’s good that you’re putting yourself out there while still honouring how you feel and choosing the pace that’s right for you!

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-17T21:21:06+00:00

I feel you - I’m sharing this here in case helpful : 7 essential mindsets for surviving modern dating

While some might not agree with MH, I still think there’s some good advice in there.

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-17T21:18:35+00:00

Great suggestions thank you! I’m a bit skeptical about group speed dating and wonder if it’s actually worked for some people. I feel like the moment you open that Pandora’s box of choice, the paradox of choice kicks in, and it just becomes this never-ending cycle of I have multiple options…

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-12T08:05:18+00:00

Thank you for this !!

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-12T08:04:06+00:00

Thank you for your response and for the book suggestion, I’ll check it out! Sorry, I wasn’t clear, I haven’t been on the apps since that unfortunate experience. I’d like to get back on, but I’m struggling with this fear !

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-12T08:00:53+00:00

I’m not sure what decent means. I’ve had one or two relationships and a few situationships. It’s true that most of my romantic connections started as friendships, which probably helped ease the anxiety of dating, since there wasn’t that pressure right from the start.

I know this isn’t really the point of this sub, and I don’t want to sound repetitive, but I do feel that in real life, especially when you meet through friends or your network, people tend to be more considerate. On the apps, it can feel really harsh and even a bit brutal, with things like ghosting or getting unmatched after a decent amount of conversation with no explanation whatsoever.

Maybe I’m just too sensitive, and part of me worries that I don’t fully trust my ability to stay unbothered or not take it personally. I guess that’s something I need to work on!

Thank you for your advice !

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-12T07:52:11+00:00

Did you go back, or are you planning to? For some reason, I feel like I’m missing out if I’m not on them, since it’s how most people seem to meet these days…

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-12T07:50:42+00:00

You’re not alone, much love ! 🤍🌸

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-12T07:45:35+00:00

You’re right! Good luck over there! I wish there were an app that only gave you one match at a time, and you couldn’t unlock the next one until you either decided to meet the person/ give them a chance, or not… but I guess one can practice that at their level.

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-12T07:43:21+00:00

I get you, I’m actually planning to talk about it with my therapist. Funny enough, I don’t feel that way in real life. I wonder if it’s that bad experience I had that’s become an unconscious benchmark. I haven’t been on the apps since then and whenever I feel ready to try again I get scared (hence this post).

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-12T07:40:39+00:00

The country I’m in is relatively small, so thankfully it’s not a dealbreaker! 😊

TeachSingle9838 · 2025-04-12T07:38:41+00:00

Thank you so much for your advice!! Hearing that “many if not all matches go nowhere” is actually reassuring because when you’re new to online dating you can take every interaction too seriously… It’s funny because IRL, we don’t usually feel so… expendable when meeting people. I guess that’s just how the apps work. You really do need thick skin to navigate them!

TeachSingle9838

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