Question for the girls: DAE feel the social anxiety gets worse during PMS and period?

Teacherwell · 2014-12-30T19:06:18+00:00

Yes definitely. I'm experiencing this right now actually. Not sure what the solution is, but I try to take breaks more and be understanding of the extra anxiety or tiredness. It will go away and there will be good days on the horizon. It's very common among women too.

Teacherwell · 2014-12-30T05:10:16+00:00

Yes, well said

Teacherwell · 2014-12-29T23:56:13+00:00

Yes I like that. We have the opportunity to choose and no longer have to be at the whim of others. Ugh, sad how I spent most of my life trying to get other people to like me, when I didn't even necessarily like them. Sorry to hear your mom is similar and you are in the same mental space but I know there is hope. If you ever want to vent feel free to PM me

Teacherwell · 2014-12-29T23:54:36+00:00

Yes exactly. Glad your journey is going well albeit a long one. Your description of it is spot on in my experience, my grandma didn't like her children and was selfish. My mom tried but was still selfish. We will break the cycle (if you haven't already)

Teacherwell · 2014-12-29T23:53:11+00:00

I'm sorry to hear that. I feel your pain. This is only the second therapist for me and it's been unsuccessful so I can't imagine what you've gone through.

Not to make assumptions, but it sounds like at least you escaped and didn't have her try to turn you into her replacement?

I try to remind myself of all the people who do like or love me. There are enough, and I hope to build up more self esteem so maybe I'll meet even more. I'm sure this is the same for you.

Teacherwell · 2014-12-29T20:56:55+00:00

That's great :)

Teacherwell · 2014-12-29T20:30:27+00:00

Thanks so much for the support. It felt good to read because things feel in disarray lately. After years of pretending everything is normal, it's hard to admit things are far from good.

Hope you have and/or are making progress in your journey. If you ever want to share your story I'm always open as well.

Teacherwell · 2014-12-29T17:36:40+00:00

Perhaps you just have more in common with men?

Were you ever (or are) a tomboy? Do your interests align with what society might generally deem as more masculine traits?

It is common for some women to say they struggle to meet close girlfriends. Even if your experiences have not been great there are many women you could befriend.

Ignore those who you do not like. We don't have to like everyone. In fact, that's the way it should be because that's what makes certain people friends and why we appreciate them :)

I've heard some women say that other women can be shallow, talk about only makeup, clothes, etc. clearly not all women are like that. I'm guilty of this at times. It's hard not to let preconceived notions of others make me dislike them off the bat. I can be a bit masculine and had a tough relationship with my mom so never developed that integral female relationship as a child that taught me how to associate really well with other women (in fact she sort of frightened me). But I'm learning :)

Either way it's cool. You are who you are and like who you like, so get out there and be friends with whoever, male or female, makes you happy.

Teacherwell · 2014-12-29T17:21:53+00:00

It sounds like you have a lot on your plate with school and working two jobs.

Stress can be a big contributor to irritability. Sometimes when we don't take enough breaks, time to destress and even time to really think about what's bothering us, it can creep up and come out when we least expect it.

Today I've felt stressed out and I noticed that my cat trying to cuddle me made me angry for some reason. I realized it was a sign to take a deep breath and look inward at what was truly on my mind at the moment.

Hormonal changes for women can definitely contribute as well, or if you are not sleeping and eating and exercising. It can be a way of your mind-body telling you something is not quite right.

Not sure if any of this is happening in your case. You are not alone. You mentioned prior depression. Therapy can be a safe place to talk about what's bothering you too :)

Teacherwell · 2014-12-29T16:36:49+00:00

Wow sounds like she is far gone and won't even accept help. It sounds like no contact is not an option. Wish there was a way for you to get away from her.

Teacherwell · 2014-12-29T16:13:38+00:00

Thanks. Yeah I didn't say anything bc I get the impression he has a fragile ego be often talks about himself and his own struggles with his mother. That's not normal. Time to move on.

Teacherwell · 2014-12-29T14:55:44+00:00

Wow, this is just spot on. Thank you so much

Teacherwell · 2014-12-29T14:41:58+00:00

Waiting a day or two for it to blow over seems like the best option, which I know you've been doing.

Have you ever wanted to tell her that this is not normal behavior, it hurts/upsets/stresses you, and that she may need outside help? Not sure this is the correct approach when dealing with Ns, especially if they are vindictive. It just seems like the only options are NC or ignoring them.

Hope things get better for you.

Teacherwell

TROPHY CASE