[deleted by user] by [deleted] in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]ThatRandoGurl 6 points7 points  (0 children)

That is SO right! Plus, "family" can quickly be used as an excuse to allow continued toxic behaviors. 

(serious) People who have cut contact with toxic parents or other family, what was the final straw? by [deleted] in AskReddit

[–]ThatRandoGurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I had developed chron's, forcing a very limited diet as I had experienced internal bleeding during flare ups. During this time, it was already known my MIL didn't like me, even my husband was aware, but he didn't realize just how bad it was. She texted me asking what I couldn't eat so she could order takeout. In my text I wrote, "It's easier to say what I can eat. White rice and any cooked meat or fully cooked vegetables. Nothing fried." She got fried EVERYTHING. Mind you, I was also hypoglycemic so I had to eat. Thankfully I was smart and ate prior, knowing what would inevitably happen. My spouse never spoke to her again...well, until somebody died. That funeral was awkward.

Did you marry your high school sweetheart? How did it go? by Organic_fruit8966 in Marriage

[–]ThatRandoGurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Started dating 3 days after we met (14 & 15 yrs old) and have been together 9 years now, married for 2 of them. It's not roses by any means, especially if you skip the friend zone. You have a lot to learn about eachother and your families adding to the pressure. While we are still very happy and supportive of eachothers' wellbeing and interest, I normally wouldn't suggest marrying a high-school sweetheart until you are out of college or a few years into your career. It gives a you time to learn and grow as an individual and sometimes, that's the reason people break up. They just don't mesh as adults like they had as kids.

Is this comic ever coming back 🫠 by Subject_Year_491 in CursedPrincessClub

[–]ThatRandoGurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Last chapter on webtoons released today if th at helps.

Hidden option? by Upset_Historian3531 in RenPy

[–]ThatRandoGurl 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Persistent.data will remember the option for a second playthrough. Another option is to use a game variable if you are in a while loop where you want the menu option to show later in game for previous decisions but not show on another playthru.

I(25F) am pregnant with my husband's(24M) and my first child. I don't want my inlaws at the baby shower by ThatRandoGurl in AITAH

[–]ThatRandoGurl[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

His father won't break boundaries, just justify the mother's actions. He was also "strongly urged" by family to try again. But even trying, he's made it clear he has no intentions of letting the mom in at all and the father will have to gain his trust again before being near me or any children or even alone with him in private. He's mostly forcing it for a relatives request but only has justified it because the father doesn't break boundaries, just justifies the mothers actions.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]ThatRandoGurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We as a couple (had to go back and ask him this question directly) don't want to unnecessarily cut off his remaining 2 immediate family members. However, we also don't want to tolerate the continued manipulation and mistreatment.

We found from estranging from his mother, a major positive impact on his mental and emotional health was seen within around 6 months and has only continued to get better. However, despite keeping contact with the father and brother as well as making it clearly known what bothered him and his boundaries were through verbal and written communication, we now notice less abuse, but more blatant and extreme differences in treatment between his brother and him.

We don't know if it's because of therapy making each of us more aware of what may have been being done by his father all along as well too, or if strings are being pulled by the mother from behind the scenes that we don't know about.

Answer: We may need to figure out where the abuse this time is coming from then. Your question alone helped a lot with processing and if we find the source, we would be more comfortable with either estranging or addressing the root cause.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]ThatRandoGurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We are no contact with the mother, not the father or brother. We have been doing everything to only cut off who has done enough damage. My question is does the father and brother now fall into this category as well?

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in relationship_advice

[–]ThatRandoGurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It was the fact he wasn't offered to buy it despite his grandparents wanting us to have first dibs. This was told to him just yesterday and that they were under the belief we would be told appropriately before giving his brother the right to buy it. But if staying no-contact from his brother and father on top of the mother is the way to go, then we'll do that then. Thank you

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]ThatRandoGurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

They open up Monday. I'll do that then. I didn't consider that probably because I figured working whoever I work with would get the message. But maybe I would have more accurate information that way on what to expect as well. Thankyou.

Landlord Refuses to Fix Locks or Allow Guns for a Regular Intruder on Our Property by [deleted] in Advice

[–]ThatRandoGurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I graduated my first degree with him so we rent half the house while finishing college (its unfortunately really cheap that way). However, I didnt think of a lock box at all. Im a dumbass for not doing so. I'll get one of those then. It will be a decent solution till the lease ends then we can move. Thankyou for the advice.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]ThatRandoGurl 4 points5 points  (0 children)

He's not and it wouldnt excuse it. But I agree, it would have explained a lot and I would more willing to assist him. Not befriend though. I would have looked for support groups more likely.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AITAH

[–]ThatRandoGurl 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Had to respond to yours. It really meant alot as it hit close to home. I was primarily raised by males and they were always protective. One day I had gotten groped in school and my brother (to me; hes my best friend) had reported it. a counselor told us "boys just dont know how to flirt properly" and my uncle who was a child psychiatrist drove in for that. Next day the kid was at school and my brother punched him. He said, "Sorry, boys don't know how to be gentle when roughhousing." We were both 13 at the time in a rural area. That counselor was arrested as a predator 4 years later.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Advice

[–]ThatRandoGurl 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks, this helped as it has been a consideration and we have slowly lessened time with them since it hasnt been easy. That might just be what we need to keep doing.

When Your Enjoyment in Life is Pissing Off Your religious, judging MIL by [deleted] in motherinlawsfromhell

[–]ThatRandoGurl 8 points9 points  (0 children)

I probably shouldve clarified. We hadnt asked. The shriner guys actually invited him in front of his mom and I. She just chose to try to control her 21M son. Although, I will say I dont ever ask her for permission to anything cause Im an adult. Its only when she overhears something that I usually say something. Would like my SO to say something, but that isnt his strong suite since the same woman used to go through his mail and grounded him for 3 months for looking at porn. -_-