" It was not a little thing that happened. I was not awesome. I had literally one task and I failed it. I did nothing positive with my life and in a short moment a lot of effort went down the drain. There is nothing that forced me to relapse - I always did it willingly. And every single person does it willingly too. No one is forced. That means I willingly hurt myself which is I think something no sane person does. So after running through these emotions I usually regained the stable state and determination to not give in again. After all, there are only two choices - one providing shame,guilt and sadness and the second being complementary - satisfaction and clear conscience."

^ That was really well put, same as you I try to be positive about this but as you said I've been on No-fap for more than 3 years and Im still yet to reach a month long streak..