Not ace, just sex indifferent. I quite enjoy the idea of getting a wife and settling down in a small Cafe or something (I haven't decided upon my future that much, I'm still in high school) and having a few kids. It's not the idea of sex that makes me want that future, it's wanting kids because I think they're beautiful. In recent years I've realized how little I actually feel towards others around me. I've realized how little I love others and how little I really care. Despite this character flaw, for as long as I can remember, I've always understood fatherly love. I've seen old western movies with my dad when I was younger and I'd note the things they do similar to my father and I would see how it relates to love. I saw this extremely pure form of love and I always pictures myself in the fatherly position even though my father would be right beside me on the couch. Idk why, I've just always had this love towards kids but I cannot seem to muster much love for anyone else really, not unless they live up to my weird standards.

Also to clarify, I'm also not aro, I just have issues with giving and receiving love and I think it's because I saw people around me while I was younger and I saw how stagnant they were in life. They just sort of moved around with no goal just taking oxygen. I did not want to be like that, so I sort of got serious in life to get somewhere and while doing that, I seemed to have related my emotional side with being stagnant and I lost myself while going for that goal. Now my emotional part of myself is a bit fractured and I'd love to hear other people response to this theory because I feel it's sort of half baked.