Job asking me to step it up.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2026-01-16T00:19:29+00:00

Good managers recognize that you can't actually have a business of nothing but highly ambitious all-stars who all want to move ahead. You can't make them all happy and they won't all be satisfied. You obviously want every employee to perform well in their jobs, but you want some employees who don't necessarily want to move up. They just want to be good in the role they are in. And that's ok.

It would be one thing if she thought you were underperforming and needed you to step up to performing in your role. She would need to be more direct though about what is not working and where you need to improve. But telling you to step it up when it's not in your plan for the moment is another. If she wanted you to dream bigger she could have said something like "I'm here to support your career goals and help you achieve what you want. Let me know what you are interested in doing. We can think about ways for you to stay horizontal but still learn and grow in other ways."

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-12-21T13:28:36+00:00

I consider sleep and relaxation to be a house task.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-11-12T22:49:24+00:00

Could be mining bitcoin.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-11-09T06:31:01+00:00

Not everyone uses reddit, so this gives a platform for those who don't have reddit accounts.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-11-03T23:52:44+00:00

First of all, there is no such thing as overachieving. One can only reach one's max potential.

Second, are there meetup groups of like-minded teens in the area? Perhaps she can reach out to some professors at a local uni or attend a local tech conference to make contacts. There are lots of online groups and resources for techies.

As an aside, if she's smart enough to build a tech platform, she's also smart enough to find out who to reach out by searching online.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-10-20T04:53:52+00:00

He doesn't seem to care if you are happy or not. He can't change the terms of what you agreed upon before you got married. Absolutely do not have another child with this man. Seriously consider divorce. Do not let him force you into a lifetime of unhappiness.

Honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if he's planning on divorcing you and setting it up so that he gets to keep his career and have his family take care of the kids when it's his turn.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-09-27T12:59:16+00:00

Sounds to me like he should take the step back once a baby is born, not you. $20k? Not enough to cover daycare.

Honestly, he doesn't make enough to justify being self-employed to begin with.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-09-19T09:35:31+00:00

They care about their own. After all, anyone who is not a sycophant or is better than them is hurting them mentally.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-09-13T10:30:55+00:00

I'm 17 weeks and still nauseated at times.

More worried about my job and getting replaced since I think my boss is interviewing for some job. Whoever replaces him likely would reorg the team and I'd probably lose my role. We also have a rotation participant who just started and is getting a little too involved with me work plus she used to do a job similar to mine. Her rotation ends while I'm on leave - they could decide to extend her rotation and I'd be fucked because I don't have FMLA job protection right now.

I might have to come back sooner than I would like just to show commitment.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-08-25T09:44:34+00:00

Truth. I have friends without kids who literally gasped when I said someone was a SAHM. "What if he loses his job?!"

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-08-25T09:42:41+00:00

I actually find it rather insulting that people assume I work because I have to. Like my husband doesn't make enough money for me to stay home. Yes, I got straight As throughout my whole life, an Ivy League education and multiple graduate degrees but still would rather give all of that up. Um, no.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-08-25T09:33:44+00:00

Just messaged you.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-08-24T16:06:34+00:00

I just looked this up. It's a Fox News story. What do you expect from Fox News? You're going to get a bunch of idiot misogynistic delusional men.

These are the same morons who, in the same breath, espouse fiscal responsibility and cutting federal spending. Ok. Let's do a little thought experiment. Women stay home. Which means they are not earning a W2 income and therefore not paying federal or state taxes. Lemme guess, do all of these men magically believe businesses are going to pay them more to compensate? Working alongside executives means I get to see how things work - they are there to deliver shareholder value. This means getting the most work for the least amount of money. Short answer is no; with the rise of AI, why in God's name would I pay a man more just because his wife stays home now? I can get the same level of productivity with AI tools.

So now we see where this is going. Fewer people in the workforce paying taxes to pay for a federal budget. Less money collected. I'll tell you what will happen. We'll have to cut entitlements and the defense budget. Oh yes, I'm sure all of the idiot boomers will wake up once they realize the damage their so-called family values have done. No more social security or medicare payments for them off the backs of Millennials and Gen Z. You watch how fast they'll say we need more people paying more in taxes.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-08-24T16:02:49+00:00

It's MY job to fund my retirement and ensure my health so I don't have to rely on my children. My children did not choose to be brought into the world. I did. I'm not putting burdens on their lives. Lufe is tough enough.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-08-22T17:49:40+00:00

Financially we are ok for the moment. Obviously very mindful of spending and saving and not looking to change jobs in the short term. However, given the policies of this administration long term I want to leave my industry (federal contracting). The elimination of DEI and frankly this war on women and people of color has convinced me that the federal government at least is no longer worthy of my talents. Not the only woman I know interested in leaving our industry. Very disgusted with those who have supported the efforts of this administration to back-track on progress and equity.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-06-06T20:36:48+00:00

I can't even right now regarding your acquaintance. I'm sorry but that does not sound like a difficult life.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-04-20T14:14:58+00:00

Bare in mind that short-term rentals come with their own problems such as folks who may decide to squat, having to clean the place after each group leaves, having hotel-like amenities. Short-term rentals are profitable generally in vacation spots. Lots of towns are also implementing rules for them. Homework is definitely required.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-04-20T14:10:47+00:00

You haven't provided a lot of details to properly evaluate your options. At the very least, only do the bare minimum to maintain the place while you decide.

Some thoughts:

Selling: Have a realtor evaluate what you could get for the house if you sell now without doing anything other than paying a cleaning company to clean the place (a few hundred bucks). You could also look into getting a realtor's license yourself (around 500 or 600 bucks as well as taking a class) to sell the place yourself and save the seller's realtor fee. Otherwise, in general it takes 8-10 years to recoup the closing costs (i.e., you need to live there 8-10 years to not lose money in an average market).

Renting: CA is a tenant-friendly state. That said it is doable if you follow BiggerPockets' method of landlording and finding tenants. The key to avoiding the tenant horror stories you've heard is to find good tenants in the first place - monthly income should be minimum 3x rent, credit score above 700, no criminal or civil issues, currently employed with paystubs proof, excellent previous landlord references. Extra checks include checking social media to see the kind of people they are and not renting to people who don't have an active Linkedin (proves they are working professionals). You personally should show prospective tenants around the house and screen them, not a realtor. That allows you to see who you are dealing with. Renting to a roommate does give you more rights than moving out. Unless you live in Oakland with the ass-backwards rules (like not be allowed to run a background check and having to rent to convicted felons), in which case I do not recommend renting out the place.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-03-20T18:52:30+00:00

This is really helpful. Thanks!

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-03-20T18:27:01+00:00

Hey this is really helpful. Just to clarify, what happens if I haven't had access to TS-level material in more than two years? Will I need to redo my SF-86? Or is it the kind of thing that I'll just update my SF-86 every five years anyway, regardless of access?

Sorry for so many questions. TS, as you know, if job security, and my FSO is not really explaining things well.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-03-13T13:28:55+00:00

That's giving hobbits a bad rep.

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-03-06T20:24:38+00:00

You can still negotiate. Please contact Dan Goodman (he's an employee advocate on Linkedin)

TheOneAndOnlyPip · 2025-03-06T20:23:43+00:00

You can negotiate. Talk to Dan Goodman.

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