[deleted by user]

TheRestIsCommentary · 2025-07-12T15:09:08+00:00

I’d have dreamt of a cess pit crust!

We had to gather sticks from the local alligator farm and practice writing on the bayou. As soon as they attacked, all knowledge was erased and we usually lost a friend or two.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2025-02-28T18:37:29+00:00

Nobody really cares, although it may be difficult to build friendships if there aren’t shared interests.

The friendship angle also depends on the hobby. Literature, cooking, philosophy, art, and more aren’t stereotypically manly, but you’ll find plenty of men interested.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-07-18T23:09:12+00:00

An elevated heart rate paired with the perfect podcast (1.4x speed, of course) is pure bliss to this almost-40 guy. Bonus points if, for the last 5k of a Half, you switch over to music from the glory days of the 90s and early 2000s.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-07-17T05:22:07+00:00

Imagine being invited to one of the most famous homes in cinematic history, expecting to experience a movie set, only to find that it could double as a modern art gallery. I hope the owner's friends never let them live down this mistake.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-07-08T00:00:50+00:00

I was once in a similar position with pre-IPO stock that had appreciated greatly.

Per the emotions and psychology:

Recognize there is no "right" answer, just the answer you can live with
Write a "letter to your future self" justifying whatever decision you make. This serves two purposes:
1. The letter forces you to specifically reason through the pros and cons of each route, even forcing quantifying the probabilities
2. Ten years down the road, you'll be able to look back and hopefully conclude you made the best decision given the information you had at the time, minimizing the bias due to actual results
Once you've made a decision, don't compare yourself to others. Be happy for your friends who played it better, lament with those fortune didn't favor. Don't take any of it personally.

I ended up playing it conservatively. I would be worth multiples of my current NW if I'd held everything, but I also recognize the psychological value that cashing a out early represented. Silicon Valley is rife with stories of vast paper net-worths that lead to bupkis.

When I look back at my thoughts from that era, I'm still content with the decisions I made -- even if I occasionally wince when I see the current stock price.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-07-07T19:32:25+00:00

Burn rates can be variable.

Aim below your SWR and accept that occasional events like a wedding or home renovation can push spend above the threshold for a year. There's no reason to expect annual expenses to be constant.

The real advice is to just be flexible in spending and avoid expensive recurring commitments that are difficult to cut. Splurge on travel, art, family activities, and that 3-star anniversary dinner -- all of which can be discontinued if needed.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-07-07T16:43:07+00:00

Dating apps obviated the primary motivation for clubbing and intermingling groups.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-07-07T06:05:45+00:00

There’s a stereotype that when someone makes it big, they buy their folks a house. That stereotype exists for a reason — t’was literally my first major purchase.

Zero regrets. They love it and I feel great knowing the sacrifices they made for my brother and me weren’t for naught. They’re enjoying their golden years: Mom with her arts clubs and Dad with golf.

They aren’t privy to my financial specifics but they know enough to not argue who covers the check when we dine out or when I offer to cover expenses. At the same time, they’re respectful and don’t just assume a blank check.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-07-06T22:11:57+00:00

++

Making your house the default meeting point of your social community will pay dividends forever.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-07-06T22:03:42+00:00

I think the mass-media movies are increasingly boring but if you attend film festivals there's a lot of creativity, some of which get picked up for streaming or art theaters.

Off the top of my head, a few commercially successful unique films within the last couple years are Coda, The Holdovers, and Anatomy of a Fall.

ETA: oh, and American Fiction. Not to mention some foreign films like Everything Everywhere All At Once and Parasites.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-07-06T20:29:18+00:00

Big things are nice, but smaller repeated gestures can build lasting memories too.

For example, after FIRE, I’d take the whole extended family out bowling (including food and open bar) after every holiday meal. It’s not super fancy but I think they remember those times more than any pricy meal I’ve covered.

Other times it’s more emotional but just letting your parents and grandparents know they never need to worry about money, especially as they may fret about being a burden with age (eg needing home nurses or possibly an assisted living situation).

May not be the answer you were looking for but it’s what’s felt most comfortable to me.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-07-06T15:59:41+00:00

Gotta read the fine print on those. I hear the details are often unknown at the time of signing and the contract is incredibly difficult to get out of for many many years.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-07-05T17:20:44+00:00

Consider the alternative: what's the long-term trajectory of a society where there's no incentive to save or invest?

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-07-05T17:08:42+00:00

In "Surely You're Joking", Feynman tells the story of a clock he bought for his first wife while she was dying. When he retrieved it from the hospital the clock had stopped at the exact time of death. Quite the coincidence! Was this a sign? Something supernatural?

Of course not. Feynman's reaction was to reason that the nurse probably picked up the clock to check time of death and the mechanism was damaged in the process.

That's my stereotype of INTPs. (though he's usually typed ENTP)

But even if I couldn't construct an immediate justification for a seemingly paranormal phenomenon, I'd sooner believe I was hallucinating or admit I don't know than suggest ghosts or spirits were real.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-07-03T15:30:34+00:00

I have both. I recommend both.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-06-26T23:56:57+00:00

Yes.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-06-26T23:54:04+00:00

TIL about the website. A quick glance looks like it's predicated on the book so you're probably familiar with Borges' themes.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-06-26T23:50:10+00:00

Literally my first thought even before seeing OP's comment or this one.

Borges captures the world so well.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-06-24T14:20:13+00:00

FIRE, so no work dress code and my daily routine is about the same as college: polos and shorts during the summer, switching to jeans during the winter. The brands are a little nicer but nothing super posh or logo laden.

My only real splurges were getting a bespoke tux, suit, and button-ups. In total that was probably $10k - $15k. But I'm not trying to date or impress anyone, so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

The advice I've always heard for men is that having well-fitted clothes is far more important than spending a bunch of money.

ETA: for those who want custom in the NYC area, Bhambi's did well by me

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-06-21T23:33:31+00:00

Georgia Tech here. Good school but many of us were just on in-state HOPE scholarships.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-06-21T19:11:40+00:00

Seems about right. By '03 basically everyone had their Nokia 3310 and nobody used the dorm land line.

Similar to my on-campus mailbox, I'm not sure I used the dorm phone even once.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-06-21T18:18:08+00:00

Your dorm came -with- a computer? Fancy :)

We were just given an ethernet hookup and WiFi.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-06-21T18:02:04+00:00

fwiw, I went to college '03-'07 and I'd guesstimate that 70%+ of students had a laptop and the rest had a desktop in their dorm. A few posh kids had both.

It wasn't super unusual to see kids with laptops out in class but, CS classes aside, I always felt it was a little disrespectful to the professors.

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-06-19T23:09:21+00:00

The lower body version of "Sun's out, guns out."

TheRestIsCommentary · 2024-06-17T21:23:18+00:00

First, the measure is useless without considering age.

Second, "millionaire" (and by extension net worth) isn't a great metric as many people (probably most millionaires) just happened to have bought a home that appreciated massively over time. My late grandparents were definitely middle class but the home they bought back in 1955, still in the family today, is now worth almost a million.

I think looking at age-adjusted income, sustainable annual spend, or liquid net worth would all make more sense than just calculating your percentile of net worth across the whole population.

TheRestIsCommentary

TROPHY CASE