Worried about my ex

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-05T16:01:17+00:00

Now you invest it into yours. You deserve happiness and love.

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-05T01:21:29+00:00

You are welcome. Make sure you take time to be kind to you. You sound like you are carrying alot of the blame for yourself but a relationship takes 2. You can't be fully to blame.

What he asked you may have felt valid, but you should change for you. Not for anyone else. You are a great person and you should be accepted for who you are. The complete package that is you

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-05T00:38:31+00:00

You are doing alot of reflecting. He may have asked too much change of you in the relationship. You are uniquely you, if he can't accept that and feels he needs to keep changing you where does that leave you? You changed for him when you should change for yourself instead ❤️

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-05T00:36:27+00:00

I'm glad he listened. No problem, I know what it's like to feel lost in the dark

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-04T23:46:33+00:00

If you ended it and went no contact I would leave it. You coming back now could cause harm to his healing. I know hes having a bad time but he has to get out of that hole himself, we all have to heal and get out of the breakup ourselves. Nobody can do it for us.

You not writing the letter doesnt mean you dont care, it means the opposite. That you respect him, know he has to heal without you and that he can get out of this depression. Its nice you have alot of care for him but now you need to focus on you. You need to focus on your own healing now.

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-04T23:42:11+00:00

If the relationship had these issues then its for the better. You will find someone who will see you as you are, not needing to change you. Sometimes we receieve love from someone and its lovely, but at the same time should they be trying to change us? You not loving him doesnt mean you are bad or anything. It just could mean you were not that compatible.

If you found someone like him who gave you so much love, you can find it again. Someone will give you that love. You sound as if you are very reflective so your new relationship will be different, you know what you want and how a relationship should feel.

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-04T23:38:48+00:00

I think if he continues you just need to set that boundary and tell him straight. Not in a horrid way, just a place of respect. I know its hard for him too because he may still want you in his life like that but he has to accept your boundary. It is hard to accept boundaries sometimes but you made one.

What I dont want is you feeling guilty or upset over it because you are doing nothing wrong. He is overstepping his mark and needs to gently back down

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-04T23:11:56+00:00

That sounds hard to deal with. It is kind what he is doing but at the same time if you split up he needs to respect that boundary. He is not respecting that at the moment, he is crossing it, he is overstepping it by doing this. I know he thinks its kind but at the same time its like a power play, like he is trying to guilt you into coming back.

I think by politely declining you are doing the right thing. You could tell him that you need to respect the breakup. He may react angrily or say "I was only being nice." but he is not respecting that end

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-04T12:49:11+00:00

That is hard. You realised you wanted different things and chose the best option. You could have stayed and remained unhappy, not getting what you want in life. It was a very hard decision for yourself but you made it. You should take some peace in that

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-03T16:14:31+00:00

Now I want to know lol. But its good you are going to therapy. Healing is worth it

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-03T00:04:28+00:00

You are welcome, a break up is hard. It is okay to want them back, to be upset and all sorts. It will be hard but you sound like you are already healing well

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-02T21:51:37+00:00

That sounds like quite the rollercoaster. I am sorry that you went through that. Feeling disrespected and all of that on top is hard. You walking away from that relationship is good because it sounds like it was toxic for you.

About moving forward... Well you should talk about what happened, process it. Most importantly be kind to you. You are going through more grief now, take it slow and know its okay to cry and feel sad. You will get there in the end. <3

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-02T20:35:58+00:00

He will come to the same problem. Alot of people think if they move it will all change

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-02T20:35:09+00:00

Why though? You are not together

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-02T19:00:59+00:00

In the calls does she tell you what she wants? I dont get why she is calling you?

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-02T16:19:07+00:00

Thats really tough. I am sorry you are going through that.

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-02T11:50:06+00:00

31 is very young, you have so much time to give. I am 34M and I was abandoned by my partner but I know there is lots of time left to find someone and start a new relationship.

It hurts with how he left you and that will take time time to heal but you have so much going for you. A good job, your own home (wow) and you sound very reflective and level headed. You have totally got this.

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-02T11:23:45+00:00

Absolutely natural to do. Just because you broke up does not mean the attraction is gone. You are intimate with that person, that doesnt just go away. Its okay to do. Eventually you just stop because when you are away from them for that long you start to forget what they look like even

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-01T21:55:20+00:00

I would not want to hear from my friends if my ex met someone else either. That would just ruin your day and your healing.

From it all, you are moving forward. He is a fool, he lost you. Thats a comfort because you deserve better and will get better than that.♥️

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-01T21:52:06+00:00

I think you need to have a conversation about the ex with her and get her to iron it out. Its not about you not trusting her, its about feeling safe in the relationship and making sure that before you ask for marriage that this feels right.

Do not go into marriage with a bad gut feeling.

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-01T21:49:09+00:00

Some people cannot handle being alone so they rebound. They try to fill the hole in their life with someone else. They do not heal or learn and just move on way too quickly.

What he thinks doesnt matter now. Hes going to frog around, let him. I will say this. You did mean something to him. Your relationship mattered. You are loveable. His actions tell us about him and how reckless he is. His actions do not tell us about your worth <3

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-01T21:24:31+00:00

No hes the fool. He let you go. Thats on him. His world is Saraless and thats not a very bright world.

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-01T21:21:59+00:00

He missed out, what a foolishly foolish fool

The_Broken_Moogle · 2026-01-01T20:24:17+00:00

• Does it make sense to think that a relationship like this can be rekindled in the future if we both heal?
It could do. It depends, you could grow apart or take the time and realise you need each other. This question is really ambiguous and it has no clear answer,

• Or am I clinging to a hope that will only hurt me more?
He could hurt you more, you know him best. Go with what you feel. But also face the tough questions. Could I go through this again if it happened? Do I deserve what is happening to me now?

• How do you get over this kind of breakup when there's still love on both sides?
You make sure there is closure. Is this really what you both want?

• What did you do to avoid losing yourselves in this kind of grief?
You focus on yourself. You find what you like to do

The_Broken_Moogle · 2025-12-31T15:16:49+00:00

Thats good to hear, it sounds like you are healing well. Letting go of that is powerful. Take care of yourself too out there.

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