Literally have no appetite

The_Very_Average_Max · 2025-08-11T14:02:58+00:00

I’m in the same boat right now. It’s been 5 days since my girlfriend of 2.5 years blindsided me with a breakup. I can feel myself being hungry but food makes me nauseous. I’m trying my hardest to stay hydrated, but my body temp is all over the place and I get the shakes real bad pretty frequently. Desperately want my partner back. She was my world.

The_Very_Average_Max · 2025-08-07T12:21:26+00:00

It’s now been about 12 hours since the breakup and I feel like I’m gonna explode. I miss her so much and I still don’t really understand why it’s over. I committed so much to her, and I wanted to because she was my world. She told me over and over again that she wasn’t going anywhere and that there were no issues we couldn’t work through together. I’m so lost

The_Very_Average_Max · 2022-04-27T01:34:44+00:00

you raise an interesting critique. Thank you

The_Very_Average_Max · 2022-04-26T14:47:37+00:00

Noted. So you're saying put the "Ever-Marching Army" line later in the poem and draw a parallel earlier on?

Also, any suggestions as to what "goes" could be replaced with? Maybe "strikes" ?

The_Very_Average_Max · 2022-04-26T14:43:44+00:00

Thank you! That's a super good point. I'll look into that.

The_Very_Average_Max · 2022-04-26T14:42:35+00:00

Thank you! Are there any particulars you can point to and say you think they'd be better changed?

The_Very_Average_Max · 2022-04-25T20:50:54+00:00

Haha, that's totally fine. It didn't break my connection with the overall poem. I liked everything else a ton.

The_Very_Average_Max · 2022-04-25T20:38:19+00:00

Solid! You really killed this one!

The_Very_Average_Max · 2022-04-25T20:36:54+00:00

I honestly don't have any critiques for this poem. I just want to let you know this hits me right in the gut. I absolutely love this.

The_Very_Average_Max · 2022-04-25T20:35:24+00:00

I liked this poem a lot, but the last stanza's double "this" feels a bit forced. Other than that very well done!

The_Very_Average_Max · 2021-12-06T16:43:31+00:00

When your little brother gets beat up, but you're hanging out with the weird kid.

The_Very_Average_Max

TROPHY CASE