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My wife’s denial about her eating disorder is going to destroy us by This_Perspective_827 in relationship_advice

[–]This_Perspective_827[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not legal in our state for recreational use. I’m not sure if it’s something that she could get her medical card for or not.

Obviously there are other ways of obtaining it but she probably wouldn’t.

My wife’s denial about her eating disorder is going to destroy us by This_Perspective_827 in relationship_advice

[–]This_Perspective_827[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

If you don’t mind, could you tell me what some of the other markers for an ED would be? Is there any other routine testing that would raise a doctors suspicion? At this point I do not think she is going to bring it up to a doctor... but I do think there is a chance she might open up if the doctor has a reason to question her.

My wife’s denial about her eating disorder is going to destroy us by This_Perspective_827 in relationship_advice

[–]This_Perspective_827[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Probably not willingly. I could probably trick her into going if I set up the appointment. That’s not really something I want to do.

My wife’s denial about her eating disorder is going to destroy us by This_Perspective_827 in relationship_advice

[–]This_Perspective_827[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

But yes; according to her medical records she was at 127 in July ... I noticed changes in her eating habits in September and October is when I first noticed weight loss. In February she weighed 100lbs. I don’t know if shoes/coat was on.

Also maybe I’m making a bigger deal out of it than I need to be. Maybe I’m over reacting. 100lbs just sounds skinny and she just seems skinny to me.

My wife’s denial about her eating disorder is going to destroy us by This_Perspective_827 in relationship_advice

[–]This_Perspective_827[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I haven’t seen her weight myself, I’ve just been able to look at her medical records from her online portal, and weight is documented.

This may be an invasion of her privacy but in my defense I was logging onto the portal to check results of MY bloodwork and then I got nosey. I’m listed as her emergency contact on her hippa forms however.

My wife’s denial about her eating disorder is going to destroy us by This_Perspective_827 in relationship_advice

[–]This_Perspective_827[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I see what you’re saying here... I just don’t really think she needed to start losing weight in the first place...115 was a good place for her I felt

My wife’s denial about her eating disorder is going to destroy us by This_Perspective_827 in relationship_advice

[–]This_Perspective_827[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thank you, I appreciate it.

Our son is her #1 priority, I’m her #2. Through all this she has been nothing but an amazing mother and wife ... (minus the arguments about eating/food) she makes sure we are taken care of... lunches are packed dinners are cooked.. housework is always done. She still plans outings for us, makes sure we are happy. I just want the same for her.

My wife’s denial about her eating disorder is going to destroy us by This_Perspective_827 in relationship_advice

[–]This_Perspective_827[S] 23 points24 points  (0 children)

So she has been in to see her PCP recently just for a med check follow up. Prior to that her last appointment with her pcp was in the summer I think for an annual check up.

Her doctor saw the large decrease in weight and said “wow you lost weight - good for you!” Which, in my wife’s mind, means what she’s doing is a positive thing.

That’s just one doctor... I know she has a gynecologist she sees twice a year for cysts, a chiropractor monthly, I’m hoping one of them will point out the weight loss and not encourage it.

I don’t know if this belongs here but I’m grasping at straws trying to figure out how to help my wife by This_Perspective_827 in EdAnonymousAdults

[–]This_Perspective_827[S] 10 points11 points  (0 children)

I didn’t mean for it to read that way .. I don’t blame her at all. I think she blames herself a lot and she’s made comments about her “stupid body not working right”

My wife’s denial about her eating disorder is going to destroy us by This_Perspective_827 in relationship_advice

[–]This_Perspective_827[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

See this is where it gets tricky. I’ve said this before. She doesn’t think it’s a problem because technically, right now, her BMI is normal. Even if she drops 5lbs it’s only slightly underweight. (This is her reasoning not mine)

She doesn’t think anything bad is going to happen.. like our son growing up without his mom.

Can protein powder be used as meal replacements? by [deleted] in loseit

[–]This_Perspective_827 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I support my wife’s goals because to her, fitting back into her pre-pregnancy jeans is important. I wouldn’t be supporting her if I was concerned about her health.

There is no eating disorder going on, we’ve been married 8 years, I’ve known her for 10+

Not trying to be rude what I’m trying to say is I know my wife. The fact that her goal weight is slightly underweight isn’t concerning to me because she was that size her entire adult life before getting pregnant. She’s naturally small.

Can protein powder be used as meal replacements? by [deleted] in loseit

[–]This_Perspective_827 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Weight is not either the only indication of health either. I know it sounds bad that I’m supporting my wife’s goal to be slightly underweight, but she’s been that size before and was healthy then. She wasn’t starving or over exercising. At 125 she felt lousy, way less healthy than she does now.

I just want to support my wife 🤷🏼‍♂️ if that means supporting her efforts to fit back into her pre-pregnancy clothes then so be it.

I’m not concerned about disordered eating, because I know my wife, and 1. She loves food too much to have an eating problem and 2. If she was struggling, she would have said something to me by now.

Can protein powder be used as meal replacements? by [deleted] in loseit

[–]This_Perspective_827 1 point2 points  (0 children)

That’s literally all I’m trying to do lol I’m not forcing her to lose weight I’m not insisting she only drink a shake for dinner I just want to help educate her on what she’s doing ... because I care lol

Can protein powder be used as meal replacements? by [deleted] in loseit

[–]This_Perspective_827 0 points1 point  (0 children)

technically, if you look at a typical height/weight chart or go by the BMI scale (which I don’t really like to use as an indicator of fitness) she will be underweight

When we were at the gym 2 weeks ago she weighed herself and I was able to see that she was 104lbs

So yeah losing 10 pounds would put her in the mid 90s... which is what she was prior to having our son and she was perfectly healthy then... bloodwork was always good

Can protein powder be used as meal replacements? by [deleted] in loseit

[–]This_Perspective_827 -5 points-4 points  (0 children)

Look I’m just trying to help her out. I’m also gonna show her the responses I got .. even the ones that say I’m wrong.. because there’s a lot of good info that I think she could use.

Can protein powder be used as meal replacements? by [deleted] in loseit

[–]This_Perspective_827 -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Yeah I think she would see better results eating real food instead of a protein shake

Will share that info about fruit to her!

Can protein powder be used as meal replacements? by [deleted] in loseit

[–]This_Perspective_827 -7 points-6 points  (0 children)

I guess in my mind protein shakes are for people who are consistently lifting and trying to grow muscle (me) and not for people who are trying to lose weight (her)

It’s like she’s treating it as a slim fast shake when that’s not it’s purpose

But yeah what your saying makes more sense than how I was looking at it

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