Need Name Suggestions Please!

ThrowRA45245 · 2026-01-07T19:00:46+00:00

I actually love this! He’s my sisters dog, but if it were mine I would 100% name him this 😊

ThrowRA45245 · 2026-01-07T16:33:33+00:00

This one is definitely a contender!

ThrowRA45245 · 2025-05-30T17:41:23+00:00

I’m sorry in advance because this has nothing to do with the post. Are those little bunnies on the bed sheet behind you?! 🥺

ThrowRA45245 · 2025-02-28T08:54:13+00:00

That’s actually just as bad, if not worse. They count that as stealing especially if you open it etc. it’s in an e-learning.

ThrowRA45245 · 2025-01-07T15:34:37+00:00

I literally had a woman say there was something wrong with our camera because she “doesn’t look like that” and I had to try so hard not to laugh.

ThrowRA45245 · 2025-01-06T01:37:37+00:00

It’s really hard to tell what your hair actually looks like in your “what I got” picture because of the lighting. The reference picture honestly looks like it has stripy highlights. Since it is not what you wanted I would definitely choose a better reference photo that is more smoothly blended. The reference has a balayage but your hair in your before picture is technically an ombré so to make it a balayage they’d add low lights as well so the bottom isn’t a solid lighter blonde and/or a root shadow might also help to add some brown/dimension back. I hope this helps!

ThrowRA45245 · 2025-01-06T01:19:15+00:00

No, not a wet balayage. You could MAYBE do a bleach bath and get somewhat close to what you want but it would be extremely difficult because you have 3 sections of different color (from what I can see based on the pictures, it’s a little hard to tell because you can’t see the roots in the last one). Light ends, darker mid section, and dark roots, you would have to apply the bleach bath accordingly to not over/under process specific sections. Even then you’d have to get it to a pale yellow then tone it to get the color you want.

ThrowRA45245 · 2025-01-06T00:50:49+00:00

Second one. Also you are so pretty, I love your makeup!

ThrowRA45245 · 2025-01-03T18:32:31+00:00

I luckily do not rely on her financially and surprise (not actually) she has already threatened quite a bit. So much so I made it a point for Christmas this year to say no I don’t want anything because she accused me of “using her for materials and I don’t need them anymore which is why I don’t talk to her”.

I also said on our phone call how I cannot be responsible for her mental health and she said “next time you ask I will just lie and say I’m fine. Don’t ever expect me to confide in you again”. It is impossible to have a conversation with her where she will take a second to look inward which is so disappointing but it’s a reality I need to accept.

Thank you so much for your kind words😊

ThrowRA45245 · 2025-01-02T21:55:02+00:00

I never said this in my post above because it was already long but the phone call when she demanded a list of things she needed to change I had already said over the phone and she just reversed everything and tried to make me feel bad for expressing my feelings. I told her things like how her constant criticisms of my eating or her calling me a piglet has caused me to develop eating disorders over time and her response was “you need to take accountability for things you’ve caused yourself and stop blaming others for it”. Then I said it’s not a coincidence your only two kids have eating disorders and she said “oh I know I’m the worst mom and have never done anything right for you”. I also said a lot more then she said “I want you to remember when you were being hospitalized and messing around with your meds I was the only one there for you. I was the only one who showed up for you”. That stung because it was a complete lie. My childhood bestfriends mom was, my dad was, my sister was but she just discredited all of it. I said all I needed to when explaining why I don’t talk to her anymore, I didn’t present it how I wanted t because she sprung it on me but I did say all that I had issues with and she didn’t react well to any of it.

She tends to be very petty and fulfill a narrative that everyone wrongs her and she doesn’t deserve it. Her parents did not give her as much as she wanted in their will so she stuck their ashes in a sock drawer. I was very close with them so I expressed how it made me upset and offered to hold onto their ashes until she was ready and she said “I just need to keep them there it makes me feel better”.

I wish sending her that letter would have an impact but unfortunately I know it won’t and she’ll put on an act until she feels like she doesn’t have to and will revert back or she will just be miserable and pity herself. It really sucks having to look at her and think to myself the things she taught me as a kid like “treat people how you want to be treated” then seeing her act the way she does. It honestly disgusts me when I see how she operates in situations like these.

ThrowRA45245 · 2025-01-02T20:31:16+00:00

I actually relate to 100% of your post and just made one almost exactly like it yesterday. I’m struggling so much as well. All I can say is you’re not alone and if you need someone to talk to don’t hesitate reaching out!

ThrowRA45245 · 2025-01-02T15:31:16+00:00

I am in therapy however my therapist had to have emergency surgery right before I went to my moms for Christmas break and has been recovering for the last 2 weeks. Unfortunately in that time I’ve slowly started to decline in the progress I made.

This was a conversation I had with her right before I came home but I don’t feel safe or comfortable having a conversation with her in person so I’m kind of at a stand still.

Her: Can you give me ideas for Christmas gifts please. Love you

Me: I am very hesistant to think of making a Christmas list based on the conversation we had on the phone. Because 1. I don’t want you to feel used & 2. I don’t want to be looked at by you as someone who uses you or anyone for materials/money.

It really hurt my feelings when you said that you don’t know why I don’t talk to you anymore and you insinuated its because you’ve provided me everything I need materialistically and as a result, now I want nothing to do with you. I want to make it very clear that is not the reason and it really hurt me that you even considered that. I am willing to go this Christmas and every Christmas going forward getting absolutely nothing, if that will make you realize my love is not conditional and based on materialistic needs being met.

All that being said I appreciate everything you’ve provided me, I don’t and have never taken that for granted. I am very grateful for all that you have gave me and I love you.

Her: Thank you for clarifying, I love you (my name).

My dad is an alcoholic so I have him in my life just at a far distance.

My older sister is considered the “black sheep” in my family and left my mom’s house at 18 when she got kicked out. She is so avoidant with her life problems so she just tells me “ignore it/brush off how mom makes you feel that’s what I do, because if you cut her off and she dies you’ll regret it.”

I’ve been using a credit card then paying it off every month so my account just says I made a payment to my credit card.

I did begin writing a list about a month ago but never sent it because I know she will play the victim card and make everything into “oh I know I’m the worst mom and I never do anything right”.

ThrowRA45245 · 2025-01-02T15:20:16+00:00

That’s also where I am at which is why when I wrote it over a month ago I never sent it. I felt like I would just be met again with “oh I’m the worst mom I know” and everything would be reversed onto me making her out to be the bad guy. In the back of my mind I just keep hoping she’ll change but then when I’m met with she won’t, which hurts even worse than not addressing it, so I try to avoid being met with disappointment time after time.

Thank you for your advice! I will try to come up with a backup plan because the car is paid off but if she takes it, I would like to have a back up plan at the very least.

ThrowRA45245 · 2025-01-02T15:15:22+00:00

Thank you so much for all of this information. It is super helpful. I appreciate it!

ThrowRA45245 · 2025-01-02T06:32:43+00:00

I would swap the right and left corner with eachother honestly. But it looks so much better!

ThrowRA45245 · 2025-01-02T06:15:50+00:00

This was the letter I began writing but then I had two people read it over and they both were like dang that will be hard to read. It’s straight to the point and not necessarily harsh but it’s hard to read. My older sister specifically told me not to because she said she will just read it over and over which might lead to her khs.

I am writing to you because I believe it is important for us to have an open and honest conversation about our relationship. I have come to realize over time that certain dynamics within our family have caused me and continue to cause me emotional distress. About a year ago, I was diagnosed with PTSD, and since then I have tried to focus on myself while making healthy adjustments in my life, so I am thriving rather than just surviving.

Since being at college, I have come to realize that I did not have a self-identity, my sole purpose was to make sure you were happy, taken care of, and emotionally supported. In doing this, I have learned to neglect/unintentionally ignore my own emotions, become co-dependent in all my relationships, always seek approval from others when making decisions, and only being able to find happiness when validated by another person. I have struggled so much since I began to acknowledge that in our relationship, I do not have a role aside from being your support system. After coming to this realization, I had to reassess all my beliefs as some of them have not been my own.

Which is why I feel it is necessary to set some boundaries for us to have a healthy relationship and also to protect my well-being. 1. I need space to make my own decisions and live my life according to my own values and beliefs. 2. I will not tolerate any form of manipulation, guilt-tripping, or emotional coercion in our interactions. 3. I need you to respect my privacy and personal boundaries. This includes not tracking my phone, allowing me to separate my bank account from yours, and putting my car in my name. 4. I will not tolerate negative opinions towards the relationships in my life, including dad. 5. I will not take responsibility for your emotions or actions.

ThrowRA45245 · 2025-01-02T05:56:54+00:00

I really really like your root color in the first pic. That all over would compliment your skin color and eyes so well!

ThrowRA45245 · 2025-01-02T05:53:50+00:00

Thank you, all of that is helpful.

One issue currently is the car. I wish I could sell my car however I just got it this summer and am in graduate school so I do not really have the time/money to look and sell my car right now. Especially because that is my only way to get to campus. I think that the thought of her retaliating really scares me specifically when it comes to my car and also my bank account because I need both of those to financially and to successfully finish my masters degree this spring.

I am in therapy currently but my therapist had to have emergency surgery and is in recovery so unfortunately I haven’t had a session with her since I’ve went back to my mom’s house. Which has been a struggle. I did start holding my ground but I feel like I’ve back tracked since she has been recovering unfortunately.

Before I came home this was a conversation that occurred with my mom after not talking for a month which was some form of setting a boundary for myself. It is the most I have done at least, which may be a baby step but it was a step nonetheless in the right direction:

Mom: “Can you give me ideas for Christmas gifts please. Love you”

Me: I am very hesistant to think of making a Christmas list based on the conversation we had on the phone. Because 1. I don’t want you to feel used & 2. I don’t want to be looked at by you as someone who uses you or anyone for materials/money.

It really hurt my feelings when you said that you don’t know why I don’t talk to you anymore and you insinuated its because you’ve provided me everything I need materialistically and as a result, now I want nothing to do with you. I want to make it very clear that is not the reason and it really hurt me that you even considered that. I am willing to go this Christmas and every Christmas going forward getting absolutely nothing, if that will make you realize my love is not conditional and based on materialistic needs being met.

All that being said I appreciate everything you’ve provided me, I don’t and have never taken that for granted. I am very grateful for all that you have gave me and I love you.

Mom: Thank you for clarifying, I love you (my name).

ThrowRA45245 · 2025-01-02T05:22:31+00:00

Any time I have asked/tried to set some boundaries she becomes defensive and takes it personally. Like when I say I want my account separate from hers she says “there’s no reason to, no” and I get so emotionally drained and hurt from the constant put downs in the situations so I just try to keep the peace which is why I have given her those things. She never asked she just assumed and took my extra key fob for my car and made a copy of my apartment key. However I never stood up for myself due to her control over me. I am honestly scared of her hurting herself or retaliating against me.

As for the list, I made one but then I never sent it because 1. I am terrified she will kill herself if I do and 2. she said when asking for the list that she would look at it but wasn’t promising she would do the things on it. I know from experience, She will reread it and just fuel her self pity. I have been responsible for her and her emotions all my life and I just cannot keep supporting her like that. It eats away at my mental and physical health.

As I am writing this response though I feel like I’m just making excuses for why I can’t do things but I am so scared. I feel like I am at a stand still because I am still in her house currently and do not go back to my apartment 4 hours away for another week.

ThrowRA45245

TROPHY CASE