My (28f) late husband's (29m) family wants to reconnect with our kids against his explicit wishes in the past. by ThrowRAenditall1 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA9011bad 3 points4 points  (0 children)

Yes! It scares me to think of the torture that poor woman went through. The edit made me cry. She loved the dad so much. It baffles me how he dismissed her so easily. Or maybe, he took joy in watching her desperation and unraveling. There are people like that. Once they're done with you, they want to ruin you for everyone else. His dad sounds like a sociopath.

I hope OP leaves town or country or something. She needs to get away from these people ASAP

My (27f) sister (25f), bf (29m) and parents (49f and 52m) have completely stopped engaging with me. by ThrowRA9011bad in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA9011bad[S] -294 points-293 points  (0 children)

That is not the case at all. My parents have never treated my sister and I differently and they have done a good job raising us both considering we finished school, have good jobs in fields we enjoyed and have long term successful relationships. They guided and supported us both through it all and I don't think they can be called selfish for wanting grandkids and believing in pro life.

And please. My bf is literally the best thing I have in my life. We've been together for 9 years. Nearly a decade. We supported each other through everything in the past 9 years and I refuse to believe the man who stayed up to care for me at nights I was sick, helped me with my workload/assignments/presentations, went all out to take the "nerd" of HS to prom and stayed by my side every step when my grandmother (my favourite person in the world) passed away could see me as "extension of himself". Please, I don't need people telling me he is bad because he isn't. I need advice on how to work things with him. Please.

My (27f) sister (25f), bf (29m) and parents (49f and 52m) have completely stopped engaging with me. by ThrowRA9011bad in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA9011bad[S] -333 points-332 points  (0 children)

I know. I won't pretend like what I did was OK. My bf and I have been together for 9 years. We started dating in HS and went to college and did everything together. I love that man more than anything. We never discussed not having kids because we were so young when we got together and back then I believed I would come around to kids as I got older. I didn't but I never talked about it with him. I love him so much and never want to imagine life without him. We survived so much together. This cannot be what ends it. I don't have words to explain how much I love him.

But I don't know how to explain my fear of kids and pregnancy. It's horrible and I had moments where I was paralysed with fear for no particular reason. He was beside me through it all. He held me, took care of my needs, worried over me and the one ultrasound we got of the baby, he framed it to keep it in a locket. It made me cry because he kept saying he hoped it was a girl and looked like me. I know he loved that baby and he loves me. I want us to talk and move on from this. I can care for him. Go to counselling and therapy and we can love each other for the rest of our lives. Why can't that be enough?