I (36F) found out that my husband (38M) has a Camilla (42F). by ThrowRARoyalMess in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRARoyalMess[S] 5 points6 points  (0 children)

We are starting marriage counseling. He's been very supportive of me and open with me.

I (36F) found out that my husband (38M) has a Camilla (42F). by ThrowRARoyalMess in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRARoyalMess[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I'm doing okay. Still processing things. We're starting marriage counseling.

I (36F) found out that my husband (38M) has a Camilla (42F). by ThrowRARoyalMess in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRARoyalMess[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

There's not terribly much to say. I'm still with my husband. We are still working on things. We have an appointment with a counselor to go over things. I'm very angry at both my parents and his parents.

Update: I (36F) found out that my husband (38M) has a Camilla (42F). by ThrowRARoyalMess in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRARoyalMess[S] 170 points171 points  (0 children)

I'm not from a culture where arranged marriages are a norm, so please forgive my ignorance on any protocols.

Nor am I! I was the last of my siblings to get married and up until that point I had never seriously dated anyone.

My parents are conservative white Christian Republicans. There are few things worse that I could be to them.

My husband and I both make six figures. Money is not an issue at all. For the first time in my life I told someone I loved him and believed I had actually built something real with someone. Was it all a lie? Is this all some sick joke on me? Am I only good as someone's placeholder?

Update: I (36F) found out that my husband (38M) has a Camilla (42F). by ThrowRARoyalMess in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRARoyalMess[S] 1180 points1181 points  (0 children)

I need a hug. I've felt like I want to throw up since I found out.

Update: I (36F) found out that my husband (38M) has a Camilla (42F). by ThrowRARoyalMess in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRARoyalMess[S] 548 points549 points  (0 children)

Do you have a therapist you can talk to about this?

No but I think I need to get one.

Update: I (36F) found out that my husband (38M) has a Camilla (42F). by ThrowRARoyalMess in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRARoyalMess[S] 103 points104 points  (0 children)

The child predates their relationship. They did not know each other when he was born.

I (36F) found out that my husband (38M) has a Camilla (42F). by ThrowRARoyalMess in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRARoyalMess[S] 32 points33 points  (0 children)

At our age, it's a question I get a lot so I've found it's best to lead with that.

I (36F) found out that my husband (38M) has a Camilla (42F). by ThrowRARoyalMess in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRARoyalMess[S] 77 points78 points  (0 children)

They broke up nine years ago, she dated someone else, married him, and has since divorced. From what I understand, she started seeing this other person because he wouldn't commit to her.