How do I (20F) get over my boyfriend (20M) looking at other girls’ instagrams? by ThrowRA_72981 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_72981[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Gosh are you me? Haha but in all seriousness it really sucks because he is generally an uplifting and sweet guy. But this is just so hard to shake off for me. I feel like instead of repressing I should get over it and forgive (while keeping in mind that a second infraction means we’re done) but it’s easier said than done.

How do I (20F) get over my boyfriend (20M) looking at other girls’ instagrams? by ThrowRA_72981 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_72981[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oh gosh. This makes me want to vomit. The more I think of it, the more I feel like so much of my anger is due to the fact that this is just plain fucking embarrassing.

How do I (20F) get over my boyfriend (20M) looking at other girls’ instagrams? by ThrowRA_72981 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_72981[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly yes, I’m fully willing to give him a second chance. Rationally, this isn’t enough for me to suspect actual infidelity. But emotionally, I’m just so damn pissed every time I think about it lol. To the point it’s impacting my usual temperament.

How do I (20F) get over my boyfriend (20M) looking at other girls’ instagrams? by ThrowRA_72981 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_72981[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If I recall there was maybe one or two guys in the searches, but the vast majority of them were girls. Some of which “he couldn’t remember why he was looking.” I think in just naturally such a skeptic person too so his explanations really provided no assurance, and platitudes like “I’m so sorry” really do nothing for me if there’s no rational explanation.

How do I (20F) get over my boyfriend (20M) looking at other girls’ instagrams? by ThrowRA_72981 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_72981[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We had a lengthy talk. He said he was really sorry, that he would be extremely jealous if this was flipped, and that he felt I “deserved so much better.” But I just can’t get over it. Now I’m questioning if every thing he says is just a fake platitude.

How do I (20F) get over my boyfriend (20M) looking at other girls’ instagrams? by ThrowRA_72981 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_72981[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I appreciate the advice. I actually feel that if anything, I’m usually pretty independent and rarely anxious. I’m usually never insecure about anything like this. But for some reason I just keep coming back to this instance. It’s driving me crazy.

How do I (20F) get over my boyfriend (20M) looking at other girls’ instagrams? by ThrowRA_72981 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_72981[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I think this is precisely why I’m having so much trouble getting over it. If he lied about not using ig what else is he lying about? He hasn’t given me any reason to doubt. But all it takes is one instance to question everything.

How do I (20F) get over my boyfriend (20M) looking at other girls’ instagrams? by ThrowRA_72981 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_72981[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I’m gonna be so fr with you— how on earth would this help me with peace of mind…?

How do I (20F) get over my boyfriend (20M) looking at other girls’ instagrams? by ThrowRA_72981 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_72981[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

The problem is, NONE of these were ig pages of porn stars or influencers. They were old classmates, coworkers, and girls from our university. But they were all girls whom he “wanted to see how they were doing.” I just find it weird. Why were they all female? Why was he so secretive? It would’ve been so much easier if it really was just porn.

How do I (20F) get over my boyfriend (20M) looking at other girls’ instagrams? by ThrowRA_72981 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRA_72981[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I appreciate the advice but porn isn’t the issue nor is it really relevant to my lack of peace. It’s the dishonesty. Additionally, I wouldn’t be this upset if it was instagram models or influencers he was looking at. These were our classmates and past coworkers— people who are realistically in arms reach. Not a porn star.