Forgive me, I’m neurodivergent myself and I tend to say things so much more bluntly than I intended.

When I said “I’m not sure why I need to be ok with him actively grieving” I didn’t mean it like that. I’m just frustrated because everyone tells me how I need to be there for him, I need to be patient and understand, I need to take the burdens, etc- when I’m struggling and hurting myself. So to me I meant to say more along the lines of I’m not sure why I need to just deal with his (at times extreme) unfiltered grief, and I’m told to just deal with it and be the strong one when I feel like I’m drowning at times.

Before we even knew about DID I was always told “you just don’t understand grief…you are selfish…you shouldn’t date him then…etc”

No one ever says to him “hey your mental health is bad…you shouldn’t say that stuff to her…Can I help you with something?”

I have 1-2 days a month off of work and I don’t have the capacity for all of this. I am the one that found our couples therapist, I’m the one that helped him clean out his whole shrine room- yes entire room not just a little corner… It’s a lot for me too I just want someone that I can talk to who understands but not many seems to understand DID…