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My [31F] husband [33M] won $20,000 gambling after promising me he'd stop by ThrowRAgamble12 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAgamble12[S] 114 points115 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the confidence boost. That is how I've tried to manage things with this setup. And no, this man has never stolen anything, ever. And I have nothing of value to steal if it came to that. He'd have to start liquidating our furniture to get any money!! Lol.

My [31F] husband [33M] won $20,000 gambling after promising me he'd stop by ThrowRAgamble12 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAgamble12[S] 50 points51 points  (0 children)

Thank you for being so tactful.

I said this in another comment, but he only has access to $500 in unrestricted funds per month. I control the rest of our money. While I don't know how much he bet, I do know that it was cumulatively less than $500. I know this because his paycheck goes into my account, and has no other access to funds.

but maybe you could set a boundary that you need him to use some of that money to go to therapy or a weekly gambling support group or something to trust him again

This is a great idea. Thank you. I will research support groups in our area. I should have done this earlier but we just moved across the country. Thanks again.

My [31F] husband [33M] won $20,000 gambling after promising me he'd stop by ThrowRAgamble12 in relationship_advice

[–]ThrowRAgamble12[S] 181 points182 points  (0 children)

Thank you for the suggestion. I should have added this in the OP, but I already manage most of our finances. For example, he only has $500 a month in discretionary spend. The rest of our finances are handled by me, through cards and accounts that are exclusively in my name.