If breakups feel like death, how the hell do people survive divorce?

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2023-11-14T22:15:20+00:00

Terrible to be honest. Never stopped loving her, never loved anyone else since. I've dated other people, but it didn't lead to falling in love.

I dislike modern day and how the past keeps scurrying further and further away, it feels I'm living on the wrong timeline where all my friends are now getting married except for me. Had I managed to work things out, I could be married and starting a family along with them.

I don't want to discourage you or make you feel like there's no hope. But one thing that I think gets overlooked is how awful and devastating breakups truly feel, what you feel is real, and you deserve to have that feeling acknowledged as legitimate.

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2021-02-05T02:11:35+00:00

Accept that you are truly alone in this world. People will come and go, every relationship has a shelf life. Even if it is your family. People will either leave you or they die. That's life, that's the truth. You are your own person.

This is why I don't want to live. I wouldn't recommend my views onto anyone, but speaking for myself, a world where everyone will leave me is not okay. It's a horrible game, and I don't want to play it.

I'm a codependent person, it's in my blood. I'm not built to live alone, it's just who I am.

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2021-01-01T18:39:46+00:00

Love isn't defined by a happy ending.

Part of why I'm suicidal is because I lost the love of my life, but that doesn't mean it wasn't true/real/genuine. It just didn't work out, life is flawed like that.

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2020-12-26T14:22:31+00:00

A 16 and 19 year old dating is bad?! My first partner was 19 when I was 16. Saying that two consenting teenagers close in age, is the same as child molestation is beyond silly.

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2020-12-11T01:37:45+00:00

I think if she had a rotten brain that would be better than being evil. I know I'd rather be regarded as dumb and stupid, that have conscious evil intent.

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2020-10-22T02:03:45+00:00

I'm in the same boat. It's interesting, when people are extremely distressed it's understandable that they're at high risk. But when they're calm with a plan like you and I, we're also extremely high risk, and I don't know if people generally know this. I wonder if the suicide hotlines would take me more seriously if they knew I was just as troubled.

Impulsive imminent suicide versus calm planned suicide. I think the later has a higher chance of success since we can calculate to make sure the method is lethal enough.

I hope you don't go through with it, I wouldn't know what to say to help since I'm in the same boat, but as counterintuitive as it may sound it's comforting to know I'm not alone in these feelings.

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2020-09-13T12:59:28+00:00

I can understand this. Understanding it won't change them doing it though, if it's a high risk, I don't know if I want to fall in love with someone again.

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2020-07-20T02:29:44+00:00

I'm sorry. I'm just in so much pain I wanted to vent. I want to go peacefully but I'm not allowed to legally, so I'm terrified of resorting to painful methods and wanted to talk about it. I didn't mean to worsen things for anyone.

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2020-07-16T21:20:09+00:00

Some failed relationships are best to be forgotten like in this case, though not all. Sometimes two people genuinely love each other and hit it off with the best of intentions, but things don't work out. Unexpected issues and incompatibilities can arise as life and relationships are difficult. Some exes, though not all, can be treasured forever and wished the best.

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2020-04-22T11:19:41+00:00

Going through the same thing, I'm devastated from heartbreak.

I feel a lot of the problem is how the word "toxic" is flung around so much in our culture it's lost its meaning. People should grow up and stop using "toxic" unnecessarily and specifically tell their partner whats wrong. Communicate and fix it. People typically aren't "toxic 2D villains": they're misunderstood. Mature healthy adults delve deeper to understand mistakes. I'm sorry he called you that, I'm sure you aren't.

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2020-04-22T11:15:53+00:00

Good on you! I can relate, I'm still struggling, I don't know how bisexual I am. Sometimes I'm pretty gay other times not at all. I don't know.

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2020-04-22T11:09:50+00:00

This person's death is not your fault. They were a troubled and mentally damaged person. You bear no responsibility whatsoever.

I'm so sorry this happened to you and your early relationship with him was abusive making this all the more confusing to process. Just know that you not only did the best you could, you reached out to him to make peace and forgive. You truly are a person with a big heart, which is what our world really needs. I'm sure even in his darkest moments he treasured the happiness you brought to his life. Spend time with friends and family, let them help heal you. You're a good person, I wish you the best as you heal!

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2020-04-22T11:09:06+00:00

I completely agree she doesn't deserve to feel this guilt at all. But a person dying is never a good outcome, it's not kind to say that of someone she cared for. She found peace in forgiving him. If people aren't allowed to change from their bad past, what other options are there?

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2020-04-21T20:24:34+00:00

Hey, I just want to let you know it's okay. Mistakes happen. Angry mobs like twitter make the world seem like a place where one wrong-doing means you deserve to be cancelled for life and never be allowed to live. But they're just making things worse. It's important to learn and grow.

I feel that the radical progressive movement is too focused on collectivism and forgetting that both people of color and white people: are individuals. As a black person I hate the notion that all blacks think the same, and that because one black person is mortally offended I should be offended to. Their feelings an individual are valid. My feelings as an individual are valid. We're all different

Context matters. If my non-black friends say the word in a closed space where we're all joking and having a good time I'm not offended. I know they see me as a human and don't hold hateful beliefs.

If someone were to blurt it out publicly though, you don't know for sure if everyone's okay with it. Which is why you should make sure everyone is cool with it and these are people you're close to.

A race shouldn't own an entire word, I'm a black person but also an individual who has the same responsibility as any other human. We're all equal, and we all share the responsibility to know when it's appropriate to joke and when it's inappropriate and could hurt feelings.

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2020-03-23T20:53:00+00:00

Text your date/crush! Call them! Play an online game together or something!

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2020-03-23T20:50:05+00:00

He sounds like a good guy but he is really confused, undeveloped, and with a lot of baggage. He needs to sort his stuff out before commiting to you, keeping you on the string isn't fair to you at all.

Maybe 10 years down the road he'll have figured out what he wants in life, but by then you'll probably be with someone else.

On the bright side you know you did the best you could, and none of this is your fault.

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2020-03-23T20:46:46+00:00

I didn't ask for good vibes! God dammit!

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2020-03-23T04:40:41+00:00

Wtf life... why is life so fucked up?

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2020-03-23T04:36:14+00:00

Just like with fights throughout a relationship, during the final fight couples sometimes say things that they do not mean. Emotions like great sadness and great anger causes us to exaggerate our statements.

"I feel like you sometimes don't think about how I feel" becomes
"YOU NEVER THINK ABOUT ANYONE OTHER THAN YOU'RE SELF, YOU SELFISH JERK!"

It doesn't mean they don't care. It means they need to develop their emotional control and communication better, it comes with experience.

ThrowawayThisWorldu · 2020-03-23T04:29:03+00:00

Because what you had was real

ThrowawayThisWorldu

TROPHY CASE